My So Called Life

I'm not a perfect person...

2011-08-20T01:23:00.012+10:00

Craziest thing happened the other day. Ok maybe not crazy per se but this freaking 'the reason' started playing on the radio and I was just like oh my god what is this song and which era of my life is it even from?? I figured pretty quickly it had been a one hit wonder but also knew I had probably listened to it on repeat about a 100 times. And magically the name of the band came to me. Hoobastank. Haha. What the hell kind of name is that??! I still couldnt really remember when or why it was popular!! But knowing me, it probably had something to do with some angsty issue or the other. Mind you, this is early 20s angst!! Not teenage angst!! Will the angst never end??!!

Great, I've now decided to continue with the angst theme and play these early 20s theme songs. The Blowers Daughter. The melody still haunts me!! I can't take my eyes off of you. I can't take my mind off of you What is it about the arrangment? I think it's the strings that really get you.

Anyway, angst and early 20s reminded me of another old favourite that for some reason is not on my iTunes anymore. How could this happen. This was THE song when I left home all those years ago. Can it really be 9 years??!! And did you miss me while you were looking for yourself out there... I have not felt this vulnerable in years. Not since those early lonely Carlton years... I'm really not even sure how I can get past it this time...

No trip down angst lane is complete without Coldplay. Yellow is also from that early era but then for a really long time there was nothing in that vein. And then suddenly the bell rang and it all went down... Nothing in my life I don't think can compare to what I had to let go, the way she really broke my heart without even meaning to. It was the hardest part.

Aaaaaah. I need to remember that I'm only blogging and I don't need to say it all in one post on one night but once the floodgates are opened... Anyway, I could go on about angst and come up with about a 100 other theme songs but I shall close with just a couple more...

This isnt really angsty. I actually think no song defines our relationship better than this. Apart from the fact they're not together when the song is being sung...

'Drinking with you when drinking was new'

'Wake up cold coffee and juice. Remembering you. What happened to you'

Ok so I really really loved this song when I discovered it but at least we've reached my mid 20s now. Oh it's what you do to me. Haha. That's definitely not my favourite part of the song. These are the lines that get me everytime.

'I'm by your side

Ive got so much left to say
Even more in love with me you'd fall.'

But this is the kicker...

'I'd walk to you if I had no other way'

So let me close with something I've recently discovered. But before all that, how can I not mention my darling puppy, the real Penny Lane... There are some times I think, oh my god, why did I choose responsibility over freedom (mainly on fri evenings) but one look at her adorable mug and I melt. There are no regrets. She is the best thing that has ever happened to me. I loved Holly and Chocolate and the ones when I was younger but nothing compares to actually doing every single for them day in and out and the unconditional love and complete dependence they provide in return. Just waiting and hoping. For their next meal or their next play... And that I think is the main difference between a child and puppy. The child will eventually grow up and need you less and less and completely lead their own lives which is a great thing but it just reminds me more acutely about how my Penny needs me for the rest of her life and that is not something that will change. My life would be incomplete without her to greet me every day and night, without her licking me every chance she gets and especially without her cuddling up to me late at night or early morning. Don't matter who's uncomfortable. As long as her head is resting on me and she feels safe and I feel loved...

So rock it till the break of day
This is why we play these games

Tonight I will love love you tonight... Give me everything tonight

2011-08-14T03:25:00.002+10:00

What is my world coming to when a song by Pit Bull makes me reminisce??! For like a month ago??! I've decided to start blogging again. But micro-blogging i.e. twitterish bursts of wisdom but not limited to 140 characters exactly. But not my epic sagas of yore either. Haha. Fat chance. Let's see what happens!! So back to Pit Bull of all people. I assume it is actually a person. I wouldn't have a clue of it's a pseudonym or a guy or girl or group or what. Anyhoo, so about a month ago, I visited the party capital of the world and had one of the best nights of my life. Not exactly sure how or why but it was freaking awesome. I won't get into the details but suffice it to say we rolled Miami to Ibiza style with the Swedish House Mafia and Hed Kandi!! But that wasn't even the most awesome part. It was being my usual wide awake self at 7 am and convincing folks that the only thing to be done right there and then was to swim in the ocean. So fearlessly I dove in and floated about for a couple of hours and watched the sun rise and everything. I also know I couldn't touch the sandy floor a number of times but apparently when one is drunk, there is no fear. Ironic because not touching the ocean floor is probably when you need your wits about you the most. But it wasn't the first time and it won't be the last time. Come to think about it it wouldn't be the worst way to go. I'm never happier than when I'm floating about in the buoyant sea, alcohol gently clouding my normally overly practical judgement!! Honestly my best times in life have been in these similar circumstances. Only the sea/country itself changes. India, Australia, Fiji, Thailand, Malaysia, Italy, Spain, France... I have very simple needs :-) So anyway, that was my point. This song reminds me of Ibiza which reminds me of yet another free ocean moment... And then there was the drive to France... Road trips tend to sound more romantic than they really are... For most of it, the freeways roll into each other until they're one big massive stretch of grey nothingness with the occasional beautiful ocean view or snowcapped mountain thrown in but on every such trip, there always comes that moment where it all comes together and the right song plays and you remember why you started this trek in the first place and you manage to catch that fleeting elusive wind of pure contentment... So Pit Bull rocked it this time... Who could be next :-) My roadtripping tales for another time then...

Cherry blossom girl

2011-05-27T04:10:00.001+10:00

I can't believe I caved that way about age on the last post. Believe me, I'm still strongly for being older and wiser over being younger and thinner! Ok that was a lie. I'm totally for being thinner! Anyhoo this is totally my year for getting fit. I'm halfway there and it ain't been easy. But once you're on your on your way it's amazing how every little thing makes a difference. Anyway don't really want to talk exercise. So over it! I really want to blog about all the awesome things that've happened in the last year and a half but I don't know where to begin. Should I start with the wedding? Was it seriously a year ago? But there was so much even before the wedding. The planning, the dress fittings (the severely hungover Sat morning fittings), Bikram yoga (or boga as it was affectionately referred to), the weekly pilgrimages to Adelaide, it feels unreal when I think of it now. I search for things in my email and unintentionally come across these incredibly whiny bitchy spoilt brat emails to my parents. I honestly cringe when I read them. Did they really give in to my every whim so easily? Did it matter to me so much? At some level I always knew that the only thing that mattered was the fact that I was marrying the love of my life. That was the same level that barely planned the honeymoon apart from the flights and the hotels. That's odd no? Shouldn't I have been more stressed about the trip being perfect? But strangely it didn't bother me one bit. And even while I was on it, I really didn't care where I went and what I did. I was so relaxed. As long as I got food and drink and sun and sleep and shops. And so much beautiful ocean. But that's a whole other story. I know that most Indian brides especially don't stress about shit... It all just happens magically. I always knew that was never how it was going to go down with me. But I also didn't realize quite how hard I had to work to realize my perfect wedding vision! I got to India 4 weeks before the big day and as much as I partied and socialised by night, the amount of work I did by day (and quite often by night) was quite incredible! Don't let anyone ever tell you planning a wedding is easy. It totally ain't. Especially if you're a perfectionist and a dreamer / idealist like me. That was the great part though... it turned out to be the most awesome and perfect week of my life, ups and downs and all! There may be a couple of things I'd do differently if I had the chance again but mostly that's how I'd it again. And that's how I'll relive it in my mind every year! Oh my god, it was the worst of times but mostly it was the best of times! :-) Its impossible to record all the crazy moments. I guess the best thing for me was always the fact that I had my dearest friends around me and my dearest family around me. And my hon bun was always there to defuse every bridezilla moment (and there were a few non-humourous ones)! But there were also many humourous Bridezilla moments and I'm so gonna miss her!!!! So anyway, there was a lot of lead up to the wedding and every minute and every day was so very special and one of a kind! I don't think I ever really knew what to expect with getting married but I know for a fact that I'm so happy that I had 4 whole weeks to deal with it and didn't rush it all in like 1.5 (and even 4 was barely enough). So getting down to brass tacks, there we were... back home. Right where we started. 8.5 years later. Many times when I thought about it later, I wondered why we went back... The peope we cared about would've made it Bora Bora even if that's what we wanted. But could we have had it any other way? I honestly don't think so! It might sound trite or self-rightous to say this, but I think we owed it to ourselves and our stupid adolescent town! In my life there are places I remember! So anyway, there we were, right we started. And I couldn't have been happier:-) Even when things went to shit and folk pissed me off and the weather refused to give us a straight answer, not for 1 second did I doubt that my "best laid plans" would dare to go against me and mess everything up.

So what else shall I describe?

Rattle and bones

2009-02-21T06:13:00.002+11:00

It's been 1 year and a few months since I've written... anything... It's probably the longest i've gone since I started writing. And I started writing when I was 10 or 11. Oh dear god. That was almost 20 years ago :-( Ok so I try really hard to not like think about the fact that I'm almost 30 or whatever and I really try to live in the moment and everything but sometimes you remember all these days gone by and it really fucking hits you that that life is no more. New game, new rules. Even when I was thinking about writing again all I wanted to write about was my awesome summer and summers gone by in general. I'm 27 but a smell, a song and I'm back where I belong. Madras. The 90s. So yes it's true, I'm not as MAD about MADras as I used to be but the way I remember my wonder years will never change. They were totally the best years of my life. And that's funny cos I feel like my best years are still to come. For some things. Oh my, it's all so confusing. What does that even mean... Your sex is on fire?????!!!

I've got this energy beneath my feet like something underground's gonna come up and carry me

2007-11-30T16:11:00.000+11:00

Oh dear… I just have so much updating to do it’s not funny. I might also add that I am mildly miffed that I am getting such few comments considering the hue and cry about the fact that I disabled it in the first place :-p Lurkers, show yourselves now!!

November has been a bad month for me, health and well being wise… when I’m not falling sick, I’m merely falling. I’m so over it. My goal until the end of 2007 is to not get hurt… it’s a very ambitious goal but I’m keeping my fingers crossed. Speaking of the end of 2007, I can’t believe it’s so near… where the hell has the year gone?! I have barely 2 weeks left at work before I disappear for my much deserved 4 week break to India and I can’t wait.

I can’t even remember where I left off… September, October, November?! All I know is I (we) have been traveling at such breakneck speed, the crash was only inevitable… alas, it appears I am not invincible after all, but I am used to simply picking myself up and shaking off the debris and getting right back on the wild horse again. There has been so much going on… there’s been much of the usual… birthday parties, nights out on the town, concerts and shows (Phantom of the Opera – spectacular, I didn’t want it to end, Linkin Park – craziness all around AND we watched it from a corporate box which made for a nice change, The Killers – soooooo great and I think I have a teeny weeny little crush on Brendon Flowers)… there’s been much of the unusual… this crazy long drive to a rave which turned out to be 200km from Melbourne and in the middle of some windy hills and the text message said follow the signs and follow the fabric and my drunkenness was well tested as I looked out for tiny scraps of cloth, it started out as big floroscent t-shirts and then it became boxer shorts, until it finally dwindled away into tiny nothing scraps of fabric… and what was intriguing was just whenever we thought, enough, let’s just turn around and go back, we’d see another little piece of fabric… all of that to get to this crazy rave in the middle of nowhere with a huge bonfire blazing merrily and sound and lights and even fighting dogs… and there were stark Christmas trees that shone white in the headlights and when daylight was breaking on the drive back, there was a most surreal scene where it seemed like the valley beside the road was filled with soft fluffy clouds… but I didn’t think there were any valleys that deep on our route… was it really clouds… or fog… or a figment of my tired imagination? I only know that I had an insane urge for 1 tiny second to jump out of the car and float down into that soft inviting bed of white… then there was that trip to Byron… so much fun as expected… pictures, but not today… then there’s been food, so much food, quite unusual for us… and Diwali celebrated after almost 10 years for me… and so many friends visiting from overseas and interstate and other friends moving here to live… and who can forget the devilish hen’s night and the rambunctious bucks night (hearsay of course) and the Survivorish merge which is actually usual.

So again, I realized that my November number was almost up so quickly wrote this up to have this month on record too. I really don’t know what I’m aiming towards in terms of future blogging but at least I will try to make until the end of 2007. So tomorrow is the first day of summer and 25 days to Christmas and so much more hoo haa, it’s going to be unbelievably ridiculous. Sometimes I get very very tired.

I've got this sentimental heart that beats but I don't really mind (and) it's starting to get to me
Now.."Why do you waste my time?" is the answer to the question on your mind
And I'm sick of all my judges so scared of what they'll find
But I know that I can make it as long as somebody takes me home,every now and then...

'Cause I'm just a girl, little ol' me, Don't let me out of your sight...I'm just a girl, all pretty and petite, So don't let me have any rights...

2007-10-30T15:47:00.000+11:00

I sometimes feel that for someone who doesn’t know me except through my blog, they probably wonder a little at my seemingly endless alcohol capacity and they probably even think I’m somewhat of a ditzy blonde type character what with only writing about partying on my blog. So I am now going to try and dispel all these notions by telling you more about myself and the things I love slightly more than Bacardi Rum… only slightly, mind ;-)

I love my significant other, mind, body and soul. You would think we’d be mildly bored after 7.5 years (getting quite close to 8) but honestly, without wanting to get all sentimental and mushy, it’s even better than when we first started out because now we know who we really are and how we fit together whereas then we were such clueless kids stumbling our way through the sweltering Madras social scene and those first couple of cold, lonely Melbourne years. Now, the 7 year itch has well and truly passed and each day is better than the next!!

I love my baby sister and she is the only person so far I would willingly take a bullet for!

I love my parents and all of my immediate family in spite (or maybe because) of their exasperating ways

I heart Labradors (and ok, most dogs)… again this is mind, body and soul. One despondent look (particularly from Labs) and I am a slushy pile of putty for them to do with me what they will. I love and miss Holly and Chocolate and Fudge and Biscuit and Ginger and Teddy and Rusty and Tipsy and Frosty. Now is probably a good time for me to introduce the latest additions to my family in Madras… presenting Tipsy the Holly look alike and Frosty the little mongrel rescued from the Blue Cross (yet another birthday present)!

I love my friends and I have some pretty darn great ones… I believe you can tell a lot about a person from their friends so obviously I am pretty freaking AWESOME since my friends are pretty freaking cool too!

I wouldn’t go so far as to say I love my job but I do feel gratified when I have a clear deliverable to work towards and there’s a total adrenalin rush until I hand it in… then I get a bit bored because the fun part is over and I hate going back into the document to simply change things based on feedback… it’s just too boring. But I do love a glowing commendation on a job well done. I guess it’s hard to really love a job when it’s a job, rather than a profession. I never really leaned towards a doctor/lawyer type of thing… I think the closest I got was wanting to be a chartered accountant. Not sure what happened there… I think computers came along and that was the end of that. So 8 years later, I’m still in IT and I can’t complain… I think mostly I do like systems and processes better than I like numbers. But on some days, I’m not so sure…

There are plenty of other things I love in my life but they might be on par with a party night out or just under… I love reading… I’ll read absolutely anything although I do prefer fiction. Reading and my alcohol intake do not go so well together because no matter what the time and irrespective of how blind I am, I will pick up the book on the bedside table without fail and attempt to read… sometimes I’ve managed to get through whole chapters but the next day it’s all such a blur, I have to go back and start over. And this has happened time and time again… nonetheless I persevere…

I love eating chocolate and going out for Italian and Indian food. I love drinking my hot chocolate in the mornings, even in summer… although I’ve cut them down to about 2 a week. I love flowers… white roses and colourful tulips… I like going to the movies or curling up on the couch with a DVD… I am also a total couch potato Monday to Thursday and have numerous favourite must see TV shows per day. I love eating potato chips and ketchup… I’m not sure why I’m bringing this up but I suddenly thought of them and can’t help drooling… I completely drench the chips in ketchup and then mix them up with my hands and eat them like rice and yogurt… it is to freaking die for! I also love eating ice cream but that’s the last thing I’m going to say about eating since this is not a food post! I love listening to music on my way to and from work and I love singing along to live guitar playing. I like reading other peoples blogs (when they update them… hmph!) and my newest online obsession is Facebooking! I also like catching up with friends on MSN, the phone or email but there’s never quite enough of it, one feels. Oh my god, how could I forget… I love owning new stuff (and hence, have to carry out the necessary evil of shopping to get there)… I love driving with the sun roof open on a warm sunny day and I love crossing the river when walking back home (because as you may or may not know, I heart bodies of water)… I love sleeping… if there is no alcohol in my system, I can sleep and sleep for even 12 hours each night. But alas, alcohol does not mix well with my sleep patterns and I jump right up with the slightest noise and the smallest toss or turn from the person lying next to me. It’s just punishment for how well I sleep during the week I feel. This is why my Saturday/Sunday mornings are always crap! That’s enough for now about things I like to do.

Concerning my personality in general, clearly I am not blonde and I am certainly not ditzy… I’m quite the opposite of ditzy really… I’m a control freak so I know exactly what’s happening when… that doesn’t mean I don’t go with the flow and don’t do stuff unless its been planned and I’ve been told well in advance… if such a spontaneous plan comes up though, I mentally have to readjust stuff in my head to get my life back into sync i.e. laundry postponed until tomorrow, grocery shopping absolutely has to be done today so whatever happens getting to Safeway by 6:00 pm, after two beers won’t have mood to cook dinner so any leftovers available… nope… dinner out then, etc. etc. I also feel I have borderline OCD but let’s dwell on that another time. I guess another thing about me is that I am rather a lazy person but once I get started on something, there’s no turning back. So this is where my mental to do list helps me move my ass because when it gets over 5 items, I’m in serious trouble and that motivates me enough to cross off at least 3 items in the one go. So yes, I am also a bit of a procrastinator. This also explains my couch potato habit for most of the working week… that’s why, when the weekend rolls around, the promise of alcohol and fun times with good friends is what perks me up and gets me off the couch. And once I’m off it, I am never very keen to get back to it (metaphorically speaking) and insist on partying till the cows come home.

This leads in nicely to the next topic – the one regarding my bottomless pit of desire for Bacardi Rum… it is not true at all that I have a bottomless pit… quite the contrary… sometimes I am terribly hungover and no amount of coaxing will convince my stomach that drinking again is just the ticket to recover… at other times, my stomach gets full really quickly and again no amount of coaxing will convince my stomach that 2 drinks is not an acceptable limit at which to stop drinking. Then there are other times where I stupidly start off with beer or wine and then try and switch and oh boy does that fail miserably most times. If I’m lucky I just get really tired and want to pass out. If I’m unlucky, I feel like I’m seasick and almost always have to throw up to recover. So as per that other control freak aspect of my personality, since I know what I’m doing most weekends i.e. birthday parties, etc., I am mentally prepared to have a great time so somehow that helps me drink heaps and since I am also off the couch, I really just love to stay out and party on! Sadly, not everyone is off the same temperament and on most occasions I am forced home when people around me are passing out or the party is packing up! But look me up on the Sunday and chances are I am back to my couch potato mode and it will take rather a lot to induce me to drink and even then I will stop at like 2 or 3. Luckily, whether I have plans on Friday or not, I am totally up for anything because it’s just terribly depressing to hang out at home on the couch on a Friday evening and I am only tempted to do it if I have a very very big Saturday planned.

That about wraps it up for now. My next post will go back to it’s partying ways and be all about the last one month and it’s 101 birthday parties, concerts and other events. Things are also brightening up considerably... glorious daylight savings time is back again and we've had a couple of wonderfully warm summer days... This weekend I am off to the eastern most tip of mainland Australia – a delightful little coastal town called Byron Bay. Going with 6 others so should be heaps of fun. And in the meantime, be safe and drink responsibly :-p

It's so hard to get old without a cause, I don't want to perish like a fleeing horse,Youth's like diamonds in the sun, and diamonds are forever

2007-09-30T03:38:00.001+10:00

So I've got to be as quick as I can... the laptop battery is so going to die in all of 15 mins and I'm so not braving the cold in the lounge just to freaking blog... I mean, this is spring and all but it's like mid-winter really... it's not fair, really, but there ain't much we can do. Anyway, enough about the stupid weather... I hope and I pray for warmer weather soonish!!

So the strange thing is, how that song from the last time still has a total hold on me... I mean, honestly, that's the only reason I'm even blogging tonight... if I hadn't had to listen to that song, I wouldn't even be awake right now. And I don't even freaking like Coldplay... as a matter of fact, I'll go as far to say I hate Coldplay...

That'll probably ruffle a few freaking feathers... but what can I say or do...

So anyway, I had the awesomest birthday... I think it always helps when your birthday is on the weekend... that means the whole world can party with you without missing work and feeling guilty for whatever reason. So my birthday began on Thursday evening when we prepared to go to the Steely Dan concert... it was full on... we had many drinks and tapas and then headed to Rod Laver and once the concert started, fully sipped on the hip flask and before I knew it, the concert was finished. I mean, I like Steely Dan and all but I'm not their biggest fan. I really love Dirty Work but they had some total Mary J. Blige type character sing it which just totally pissed me off and ruined it for me!!! Anyway, we all had a blast though and had many more drinks after the concert also. Friday was a total mess... recovering from Thurs night and attempting to clean the house in preparation for Sat night but not really making any progress. Anyway, Fri evening arrives and my lover and me go to dinner and have a couple of drinks and then he pretends like I absolutely have to go to this friends house to say Hi and way before I get there, I totally know all my friends are going to be there drinking away. So that's exactly what happens... and I have many drinks on my birthday eve with my best friends and we smoke cigars and all, just for a change. And at midnight, a home made cake comes out and champagne and all... and many overseas calls also arrive and it was just freaking awesome!!!

At about 5 am, we stagger back home and I open all my presents from my lover and try a few things on as well and somehow get to bed by about 5:30 am... alas, I am forced awake by 10 am thanks to many more overseas phonecalls... seriously, it is the only day in the year, I actually give a crap about my mobile and keep it beside me at all costs!! Anyway, there is no hope left after that and I still don't even have the energy left to clean and all... at about 6 pm, things are exactly the same and I am just many more phonecalls down. Finally, I force myself to get my act together and sleepwalk my way through cleaning the house and get ready and stuff and before I know it, it's 9 pm and my guests are arriving. And from then until 7:30 am, Sunday morning, who even freaking knows what happens. It was just madness all around. It was really awesome. And I got soooooooooo many presents, it was crazy. So much fun. And I think everyone really had a blast, that was really the best part. And the biriyani that I ordered totally got cleaned out in all of 2 hours... it was crazy... not even one grain of rice was left over. :-)

Absolutely nothing exciting has happened since then... I mean, obviously the week was completely crap and this weekend was supposed to be easy but with someone's birthday drinks last night and someone else's birthday drinks tonight, it's hard to slow down!!! So it's not strictly true that nothing exciting has happened, but for me, my birthday and all it's associated shenanigans are the eptiome of party time for the year.

The strangest thing... for a few years in between, life was strange... it wasn't as happening and I honestly wondered how smart I'd been with some of the choices in my life!!! But now, I can honestly say that I love my life more than ever and it doesn't really matter that I'm 26... I still feel 18 and my life is still as exciting as if I was indeed 18 :-) I mean, honestly, 18 till I die baby!!

Speaking of babies, my best friend's baby is almost 2 years old and obviously I still haven't met him yet but amazingly he's learnt my name... it's sooooo adorable... I spoke to him the other day and he's totally like Hi, Bye, Ithi.. awwwww.. sooo cute!!

But speaking of other babies, my baby sister is now 18... she still totally breaks my heart though!! I can't wait to hang with her in December and hopefully I can show her the way. Oh my god, did I mention the fact that she got a freaking Labrador puppy for her birthday... I'm so happy cos I get to hang with this puppy in a couple of months but I feel so sad that I can't get a dog of my own :-( And apparently, she looks like just like my beloved Holly... that figures... Christmas and New Years is going to be soooo weird this year. I'm not exactly sure why...

So I've decided to open up commenting again... haha... I'm really not sure why I stopped... but, whatever...

Sometimes when you take a step back and think about life in general, it's a bit frightening... because life is incredibly strange and it really takes you full circle... with the things you do and the people you meet and the way you change...

Also, this Forever Young song... I used to love the original by Alphaville until I actually listened to Youth Group and then it was totally like, oh my god, what were Alphaville thinking?! That just goes to show... old is not always necessarily best... this song I only like the remixed Youth Group version now... Alphaville is just yawn... but there are obviously other songs where this doesn't apply at all and old still rules!!!

It's going to be another freaking awesome year... what else is new ;-)

Forever young, I want to be forever young

And the hardest part was letting go, not taking part… you really broke my heart…

2007-09-19T19:20:00.000+10:00

Wow… can’t lay claim to the mid-20’s for much longer… how the world turns and how the time flies… It’s like I blinked my eye and there went my childhood and my adolescence… happy days, all.

And now here I stand, a young adult… I guess this is kind of the end of another era… my last unmarried birthday… by next year this time, I’ll be someone’s wife… woah… that just feels slightly older than young adult.

Anyhoo (sorry Guitarman :-))… as per my new life outlook, no melancholy about getting older. Instead, I will embrace the fact that I am technically another year wiser… (really, I am)!

So since we last chatted, that weekend didn’t turn out to be quiet as originally thought after all… Fri night was a drinks on the town session, Sat was an all day bbq and beer session (not that I drank) and Sun was quiet recovery. Then the weekend after, again, the Fri night was a drinks on the town session and this one went kinda outta control again what with agua shots and jagerbombs yet again… we need to sooooo stop visiting that bar… the bartender is our new friend and he fully encourages us. I vaguely remember everyone coming back to our place and playing Pink Floyd and Toto and singing at the top of our lungs at 4 in the morning… poor neighbours. That Sat was another wedding dress expedition… I am soooooo over it. Then we hung out in a music store for about 2 hours while the Guitarman purchased a brand new electric guitar and I mused the sad fact that that guitar of mine has just been sitting in it’s stand untouched for almost a year… I really must learn a song or two… let that by my resolution in this new year of my life. Then we went to the bar beside the river of yours truly fame for a couple of beers with a couple of friends. And then we welcomed back Sam newly returned from a trip home and I finished a whole packet of murukus by myself… it was unreal heaven, and the best part was I got to take a packet home with me (not that it lasted long)!!

Finally, last weekend was a trip to some friends’ parents’ house out in country NSW called Grifith. It’s about 5 hours drive and we rented a people mover to take all 7 of us… the car was great… it was roomy and comfy and had 8 cup holders which were incredibly convenient because even the esky so sweetly fit between the front 2 sweets so it was almost tooooo easy to fix drinks the whole way up. And that’s just what we did… it was awesome… we also had great music so we sang a lot and after the stars came out it was just totally surreal to look at the sky, sip my drink and sing along to the songs of my youth and occasionally laugh at something someone else says or something I say myself. I also remember stumbling in to meet the parents and eating the most amazing biriyani we’ve eaten in a while since it was all so wonderfully home cooked. Oh, and who can forget the cutlets… my all-time favourite item.

The Saturday we woke up after very few hours of sleep and after a healthy brunch of idli, dosa, departed on a winery tour since the Region is big on wine and wine making. Tasted about 3 wines and the buzz from the previous night just came rushing back. Met a few cute dogs, took pictures beside a body of water called Lake Wyungan, and then paid a visit to a farm. It was a total Ol’ McDonalds farm with sheep and horses and chickens and dogs and a special little treat… we see kangaroos hanging out in the wild. It was a great experience… we got a crash course in sheep shearing and crop planting and land leveling and we saw first hand the impacts of the drought and water restrictions… so terrible… it really breaks my heart.

The rest of Saturday was a blur with plenty and plenty of alcohol and more cutlets and some mouth watering pork curry, potato and paneer mutter. It was unreal… for real. One by one people dropped like flies until there were only 3 of us left (me, as usual… I can party till the cows come home, man)…

The Sun was truly terrible… the channa bhutoora and chicken chettinad helped ever so slightly. And then it was time to depart back to Melbourne… it was actually a fun drive back considering we were all so f***ed up… we smoked a couple, laughed about the events of the weekend, watched the fingers of God reach out through the sky, I tripped out watching the trees this time, sang even more songs, witnessed a truly insane wind and dust storm, stopped at a 24/7 diner for coffee and a snack only to have the power go out and them telling us to get out… it was spooky… very Texas Chainsaw Massacre like… the wilderness, the storm, the power cut and everything… But we reached Melbourne safely after all. What an awesome trip!!!

It didn’t end there… Mon night, we caught up to eat the leftover food the parents sweetly sent back with us… was even better because we were actually able to remember what we were tasting this time. Also, considering the excesses of the weekend, it was mind boggling that we all had a few drinks that night. I decided to put it in my birthday week quota ;-)

And now we are here in the middle of my birthday week… it’s only getting better… I have the Steely Dan concert tomorrow, not sure what I’ll get up to on the Friday but I have my presents to look forward to at midnight, and then the birthday on Sat with all the exciting overseas phonecalls and finally, the mandatory partaaaaay on Sat night!!! It’s going to be great. I really miss my sister though and wish we could celebrate our birthdays together… it’s hard letting go… it really breaks my heart. Happy birthday baby sister…

How does it feel? To be without a home... To be a complete unknown... Like a rolling stone...

2007-08-31T18:52:00.000+10:00

So I suddenly realised we were almost at the end of August and I didn't have a post on record. I could blame my online presence on Facebook but that would be a lie cos I've only been on Facebook for about 2 weeks. And what a 2 weeks it's been on Facebook... in about 3 days, I had amassed some 100 friends and 50 wall posts and the number is still growing although obviously the number of Facebook notifications I get per day has depreciated slightly. Man, this Facebook... it's freaking mad. But anyway...

So what else has kept me busy since the last post... a lot, actually. I posted how I was dying the last time and then I went to my cocktail thing on Fri night and thought, let me stay away from the ice so I'll drink wine but it was free flowing spirits so I couldn't resist swapping to Bacardi and ice. Many drinks later, we stumbled home after dancing away and went to bed very smashed. I woke up the next day feeling not bad at all and so went and partied away that night too at the housewarmings and everything was all fine and wine. And then horror of horrors, I wake up on Sunday afternoon with the most god awful splotchy red rash all over my body. It itched and it itched and I thought I was going to die and obviously there are no doctors who work on the weekend and apparently I would've been laughed at if I'd gone to the emergency room with a "rash" and then called this doctor friend for advice and she's like oh well, if she doesn't have a stiff neck, it's probably not meningitis! So that of course made me start imaging a stiff neck and having just watched an episode of House the previous week where the patient develops splotches and they suspect meningitis, I was so sure I'd be dead within the week. Anyway, I went to the doctor the next day and she gave me an anti-allergy shot and all was well and I am obviously still alive but that was quite a scare. So I attempted to take it easy the next weekend by staying away from alcohol and I did but that was totally the last "easy" weekend...

4 weekends ago, headed out on a Fri night and had a few drinks and I'm not sure at what point things started getting out of control but pretty soon everyone was hammered and went to a couple of other places quite unnecessarily and the next day, absolutely no one could remember anything from after about 11 pm! The Sat was dreadful... I think we were still drunk in the morning when we made pancakes and called my aunt and uncle. Then, went wedding dress shopping and didn't find a thing but bought many other things instead. Then went to favourite Mexican restaurant for friend's visiting mom's birthday dinner. Drank a few margaritas to stay awake but didn't help much. Then played squash on Sun morning and went to Queen Vic market to buy meat and vegies and then fought time to get ready to go to friend's afternoon engagement party. Then ate takeaway pizza dinner, watched tv and went to bed. Then almost died of muscle ache on Mon morning since exercise was after about 5 months!

3 weekends ago, headed out for another Fri night on the town. All this Fri night business was to farewell friends going to UK and Darwin. Pub crawled a bit and got mildly buzzed but didn't go as mad as previous Friday. Saturday was still crap. Sat night was friend's birthday party so went to house with favourite labrador retriever in Australia and chased dog around all night but as usual was ignored in favour of food items. Again, drank Bacardi to stay awake but didn't help much and added complication of beginning to feel sniffly at about 1 am. By 3 am, feel like total crap and head home to pass out and pray I have somehow escaped throat infection! Sunday is easy but very painful because head cold I thought I had avoided from 2 weeks previously finally arrives in full form!!

Super crappy week ensues with not being able to take time off from work. It's always like that isn't it? That's why I use up my sickies when I just want to have a lie in... chances are I won't be able to take time off when sick anyway. Mid week farewell bbq helps to chase sickness depression away ever so slightly.

2 weekends ago, started tanking up on Fri evening in preparation of Bob Dylan concert! By the time we begin walking to concert, opening act is surely over but we walk faster and slam ready-mix in hope Bob hasn't started yet! But he has and for 1 hour we listen to songs we have never heard in our lives. Slam from hip flask in hope concert will start making sense but to no avail... finally, first song in encore is Like A Rolling Stone and heave sign of relief that I know at least one song from total concert! So night continues with more walking and more pit stops before arriving at official farewell party destination, The Order of Melbourne. Many more drinks consumed and one more bar and house visited before finally stumbling back home again. Sat is crap yet again! Sat night, dress up and head out to yet another engagement party... what a year for couples around me and me getting engaged it has been! Drink wine based punch and hang out for a few years but of course body can't handle yet another alcohol bout so take it relatively easy. Sunday is not so bad after a few weeks.

1 weekend ago, plan a quiet Fri night with a few people and a couple of drinks at home and maybe a round of poker but things don't go according to plan and quiet night becomes rowdy poker session and at 1 am people insist we go out! So out we go... back to the scene of the 4 weekends ago crime and who even knows what happens for about 2 hours. Vague memories of agua shots and jagerbombs! Stumble out of the bar at 4 am and have crazy adventures on the streets because the boys are outta control... somehow bundle everyone and souvenirs from the street into a maxi cab and drag everyone home for more drunken hi jinks before thankfully everyone finally goes to sleep. This Sat is the crappest yet and everyone is definitely still wasted at 11:30 in the morning. Head to breakfast and eggs benedict are not helping the cause at all... Great news, Sat is free for the first time in months and can finally sit at home and do nothing for a night. Sunday is also relatively peaceful after a great night's sleep and amazing 22 degree weather and bright sunshine and sipping Coronas in friend's backyard.

Happy weather days are here again... however, slightly deceptive it's been since last weekend... blue skies, low twenties temperatures, light winds... and then today, we were blasted with total winter weather again, just a reminder from Mother Nature that today is still the last day of winter and spring is absolutely no guarantee of sunny skies!!!

Two farewells were also said :-( Sad, but such is life...

This weekend... absolutely no plans... but you know what they say about the best (non) laid plans...

Cold rain down on my face, buses hurry on... Work's out, here comes the race... People heading home...

2007-07-20T14:58:00.000+10:00

So we are now officially past the halfway mark of winter but this is absolutely no guarantee of warmer happier weather in approximately 45 days.

I miss the warm sun... it feels like forever since she went away...

I even miss the 16 degree days and the 12 degree evenings... we are barely making it to double digits these days

This week we celebrated (or rather, commiserated) the coldest week in years... it rained and it hailed and it snowed (nearby) and the wind, oh dear god, the wind... such a cruel, bone numbing, brain freezing wind.

Waaaaaaaaaaaah... I feel awful... after weeks of subjecting my poor body to its usual rituals of cold drinks and harsh smokes, the added inevitable exposure to the elements courtesy mother nature in all her winter glory, has made my body screech to a grinding halt and scream enough is enough... you are now going to pay in slow, excruciating pain for what you put me through on a weekly basis and which I normally take with nary a complaint!!

The worst part is, this is like the calm before the storm... so I'm rather concerned about what's going to happen after this weekend... since Sunday night, I've had this severe pain in my sinus area and some desultory sniffling from the nose but no disgusting yellow phlegm or horrible pain in the throat which is always the harbinger of that most dreaded of winter afflictions, the mighty throat infection and flu requiring trips to the bathroom every 2 minutes to spit out all the phlegmy mucous and self-prescribed antibiotic tablets all the way from India every 6 hours. But anyway, all that I can deal with... it's awful and it sucks for about 4 days but then I'm always well on the road to recovery. This time, I feel like crap, I'm nowhere near 100% and yet, I have none of the usual cold, flu symptoms except for the heavy head and occasional drippy nose. But if I like do something, like walk from the couch to the kitchen or from work to home, it totally exhausts me which is why I know I am not 100%. So anyway, I am not medicating myself and have been waiting for improvements hopefully the whole week but absolutely nothing has changed since Sunday night and I am almost looking forward to the excesses of the weekend to act as the catalyst to bring on the storm... this false lull I just cannot handle anymore!

What a full weekend I have in store for me also... I have a work cocktail thing tonight and it's very unnecessarily black tie so I have to wear one skimpy cocktail dress now in the middle of winter... if I am not drowning in my own phlegm by Monday, but still feeling sick, I will be very very concerned. Tomorrow night, two housewarming parties to hop between and both are at some opposite corners of the world but such logistical issues will never deter such a hard core part"ier" as me... in the middle of all this recovering from tonight's hangover, getting wasted and party hopping, I must absolutely make it to Borders sometime tomorrow to pick up my new Harry Potter book. I pre-ordered of course but I fear if I go too late, I will miss out on the complimentary stuffed owl Hedwig... hehe! And also, I must make some time to read the damn book this weekend although I will fully savour the book and not read as fast as I can just to get to the end so by Monday, I will probably be the only one who has no idea who is going to die and will have to avoid all media like the plague because already the spoilers are spilling out in the thousands! I do not expect a non-Harry Potter person to get why this is a big deal at all. As much as I will miss the magical Harry Potter world, I read a rumour that next she is going to start writing mystery novels... sniff... my favouritest genre ever... good god, she will kick ass! And to round off this Harry Potter week of mine, I went to the movie last weekend at IMAX because the last 20 minutes had some 3D action... the movie was ok, couldn't come close to the book, but who really cares, Harry Potter is Harry Potter. The 3D was pretty lame.

Then, I'm trying to think if anything of great import happened to me since the last time I posted... I don't really think so... just the usual weekend shenanigans... ooh, one Sat night, we played poker and I kicked ass... we played with money for a change and I doubled my initial $10 kitty. Then, last Sat night, we went clubbing... just the weekend before I had noted that it had been a while since I had gotten to one of my total wasted stages where I am heaps of fun to be around but chances are I will not remember a thing the next day. So that was last Sat night... it could account for my feeling ill this week too!

Add to that, the weather is totally getting me down and there ain't no silver lining in sight... severe case of the winter blues... the fun weekend will hopefully drive them away temporarily!

Cold rain out on the street, I am all alone
With cold rain down on my face
I am heading home

Happy Anniversary to Me... Happy Anniversary dear So Called Life... Happy Anniversary to Me

2007-06-29T17:17:00.000+10:00

I would now like to congratulate myself on one continous year of blogging... even if I have been averaging only about 2 posts per month, at least I have every single month since June last year on record. I look at my 2005 archive and it shows 65 posts... how on earth?! I must've been super freakin' jobless... especially considering the average length of my posts and it was only over a period of 6-7 months. This last year, I haven't even reached half that. Anyway, we have reached the end of one month of winter and it has been horrific... I am ready to kill myself... really... it hasn't been this cold in June the last few years... too depressing!

On the work front, I moved to a different client and project 2.5 weeks ago and that has accounted to my slackness in updating but it has been great working here compared to my old project. Probably another 2.5 weeks here before I move on to the next client.

On the personal front, last time I touched briefly on the citizenship thing so to elaborate, yeah, after two years and some of being permanent residents we were eligible to take up citizenship so we did! I still have to apply for my Australian passport and then I have to get one of them Overseas Citizens of India cards and I believe I have basically lost my right to vote in India which I never gave a shit about anyway but now have to vote here or you get fined and stuff so that'll be rather annoying although I think they have online ballots and all which should be convenient. The ceremony was ok... we took a pledge of committment and then our names were individually called out to receive our certificates and I was on the edge of my seat waiting for my name and of course when it was called, I almost tripped and fell because my heel had gotten tangled in my handbag strap but made it to the stage and off without incident. Then we all sang the National Anthem which is not that hot an anthem and we were given native plants which I have promptly killed with neglect as always. The citizenship interview that we went for before all this ceremony jazz was actually funnier because they just look over your application and you have to mug up these rights and duties of being an Australian citizen and we mugged and mugged on our way there and since we both went in together, we were competing with each other to give the right answers when the officer asked us for them. Anyway, I really don't like at it as a betrayal of the motherland because the motherland will always be home but at the same time, this country in all it's 'bogan'ness (Australian slang for red neck type people) and 1980's atmosphere has taken me into it's warm embrace and for that I will always love it.

Then what else has happened... a good friend has left to work in the UK and travel around Europe for 2 years so that was a bit of a bummer... he's been our friend since our first day in Australia and we've had some fun times. It's not fair that I should bid goodbye to people and move to another country and start from scratch to build something similar to what exists at home and then people should go and ruin it by bidding goodbye themselves. Ah well... we now have accomodation in the UK!

So there were a couple of smashed as farewell parties... at one of them, we booked a karaoke room for 2 hours and they said we could hang out longer since no one else had booked it so we hung out for 4.5 hours in total and sang for all that time. It was really insane... I've never karaoked like that in my life. At the end, the departing couple (she's actually still here for another couple of months) gave prizes to best female and male singers. I won female which if I hadn't, deep down I would've been most upset... haha... but the prizes were these awful naked men and women playing cards. The naked men are sitting on my coffee table... they look super freakin' fake though!

Then, I've been for a couple of shows in the last week... last Sat night, we went to Cirque du Soleil - Varekai... it was unbelievable. Cirque du Soleil is this global company of human circus performing artists and they perform crazy as acrobatic stunts on ground and in the air and tell a story at the same time... some great music too. It was very unique and breathtaking. Then on Tue night, I went to watch a production of the musical Miss Saigon. It's about an American GI who falls in love with a Vietnamese 'woman of the night' just before the fall of Saigon at the end of the Vietnam War. It was tragically beautiful... some great songs!!

My gig calendar for 2007 has been pretty good so far and I've still got a few shows to go. At the beginning of the year, watched Roger Waters live in concert and Snoop Dogg, Beastie Boys and various other artists and DJs at a music festival. This month was these two shows. In August, I've got Bob Dylan... I hope he plays the songs I know and love. And in September I've got Steely Dan whose music I've got to get more familiar with and a production of Andrew Lloyd Webber's Phantom of the Opera which is my favouritest Andrew Lloyd Webber musical.

So that's been it pretty much... weekend ahead to look forward to. Oh, also went wedding dress shopping and that was pretty overwhelming. Most are Cinderella type with these fairytale stiff skirts with hundreds of layers and we were joking how my fiance could hide under there at the wedding and light up a spliff and hotbox it... it would also create this fantastic smoke effect of me walking down the aisle! Anyway, I don't think I'm going down that path so will have to keep looking.

Until next time and the next year of blogging, adios!

The days get shorter and the nights get cold, I like the autumn but this place is getting old

2007-06-01T16:50:00.000+10:00

Dear me… this isn’t a very happy time of the year at all. Blustery winds, cloudy skies, shorter days but longer hours of darkness, average temperatures of 14 degrees, the cold, always the cold… one can never escape the cold… while walking to work, at work (that goddamn central air conditioner… temperature control, my ass… controlled for polar bears and Eskimos perhaps!), walking back home, the living room because the balcony doors are kept open when making dinner, the bedroom because of the low temperatures all around… some relief is achieved when finally one curls up under the quilt to go to sleep… but then of course, there are the extremities to warm up… there is something about hands and feet in cold weather – they refuse to get warm and even when they do, expose them for 2 seconds and they become ice cold to the touch again. Goddamn weather! And it is only today that we are officially in winter which means the past couple of weeks were just an affectionate prelude…

There’s another thing about these crossover months before and after winter… fucking what to wear… in the last two or three weeks I have delved deep into my closet and pulled out all the layers I own and have worn 4-5 layers at a minimum on workdays. I may seem a tad bundled up compared to other pedestrians on occasion, but tough… I value my comfort over feeling like a chronic pneumonia patient with all the layers. Anyway, they aren’t some big fluffy layers… I wear a regular cotton top (sometimes two), cover that up with a light cardigan or v-neck sweater, my suit jacket next and finally a winter coat. All this means that come this time of year, my laundry load triples and as I am such a huge fan of this delightful household chore to begin with, it adds to the overall cheer and wellbeing. On the rare occasion that the sun does shine however on my way to work, I get slightly bogged down by the layers and resort to carrying them by hand. BUT… they will definitely be required when I leave work after 5:00 pm and all is once again dark and chilly. Oh yeah, I forgot to mention the gloves… I fished them out prematurely a few weeks ago also and did wear them on a couple of days when I walked home in a mild 12 degrees.

At least if it rained all the time… it would add some sparkle to the bleakness… but the drought continues and showers are few and far between… and boring at that… no thundery lightning filled storms bringing big fat drops of rain and hail, falling fast and furious. Perhaps I should move to England to gratify my desire for cold rain. Of course I can also just move back to India where the warm monsoon lashings would also make me so happy.

But going back to my clothing issues… soon I will have to start carrying the beanie in my handbag for days when the wind chill has the potential to cause you a brain freeze. My ears are normally covered by headphones and then there is one final item in the normal winter ensemble, namely, the trusty scarf… I am not, however, a big fan, because I find my hair and earrings always get in the way so I sometimes use one when my hair is tied up and so my neck is normally the only body part exposed to the cruel weather, and face of course. Oh yes, that other extremity… the nose… it sometimes feels like an icicle extension of human flesh and the only solution to combat face exposure is a ski mask or balaclava but even I am not that vulnerable to the cold to resort to such measures.

For the lower body, one wears stockings and closed shoes and if wearing a skirt (although I wear skirts less and less in winter and tend to bring them back into my daily wardrobe only in far off September), knee length boots help ever so slightly. Having said that I was wearing a skirt on Tuesday with stockings and shoes and nearly got knocked over on my way to work with gale force winds of 70km per hour… so very droll! I was dreading my lunchtime venturing out but I had no choice because Tuesday was the day I gave up my Indian citizenship and took up my Australian one… sob sob… my body, mind and soul will of course always belong to the Indian motherland but my passport will now declare I belong to Australia and help me to cross most geographical borders with ease and zero visa costs. But more on this later…

Then there is the issue when stopping off for a spot of shopping on the way home. Freaking layers… if you’re lucky you get two hooks in a change room and its impossible to hook all your layers and the clothes you want to try on all on the two hooks not to mention the added time it takes to take everything off and put it back on again so you take in as many items as you possibly can the one time because there’s no way you’re going through the process of undressing and dressing more than once and this of course makes that tiny little cubicle look more like a disaster zone than a change room.

And then, how about the total lack of leaves this “fall”… remember how I wrote about the wonderful falling brown leaves and me delightfully skipping through piles of them… obviously the city and Southbank are not all that tree lined or maybe it’s more they have a higher percentage of city workers collecting and getting rid of the leaves because not ONCE have I spotted a single healthy pile of leaves… a stray leaf here and there on the sidewalk because it’s probably just dropped off the tree but nothing more. So much for that little autumnal joy of mine!

At least we still go out at night and people are still entertaining with house parties now and then… this of course opens up a whole other can of worms when it comes to what to wear! You want to look hot and sexy and some 5 layers are not very conducive to this but you also want to feel warm and toasty without having to compromise on how you look. It’s really hard I tell you… I’m taking it one weekend at a time. I guess it also depends on where you’re going. If it’s a house party, we take a cab there and back so skimpy clothing is tolerable except for stepping outdoors to smoke but as I only ever need to smoke some 5 cigarettes in a row when I’m down some 6 drinks, the odds are the rum has gotten me quite warm and toasty by that stage anyway. If it’s going out for drinks in the city and general pub hopping, you want to be sure to have a jacket at the very least over the skimpy top because there tends to be walking to the bar, walking between bars, maybe having to stand in line at a bar, and finally walking back home but again by this time I’m probably too warmed up by drink to care. But all this means of course that your jacket ends up smelling like an ashtray and as if laundry wasn’t enough, there’s extra dry cleaning in winter too. Having said that, all licensed premises go completely smoke free come July 1 so no more hair and clothes smelling like an ashtray. This means of course that I will probably cut down drastically on my smoking while drinking habit but since I am not some chain smoker to begin with, I wonder if it will have any effect on the totally addicted ones. But finally, sweater dresses have made a huge comeback this season and I have stocked up on a few and I have to say they help one look hot and keep warm all at the same time so there is hope yet for this winter. But since I can’t wear them every single weekend, I will have to endure some level of discomfort at some time or another.

But enough of cold weather and fashion… recapping the events of the last two months… various birthday parties and housewarming parties and farewells and general drinking events… some good ol’ sake to warm the bones and the faithful Bacardi standby. One Saturday, we also hosted a small engagement party at home for all our friends here and was heaps of fun. I decided we must have at the very least, a colour theme, so since I had this black & silver sequined skirt I’d been meaning to wear for months but never got around to, I made the theme black & silver and I have to say was rather impressed with the turnout. Of course there was more black than anything else but it was still quite amusing. As someone put it, it looked like we were all hanging out at the funeral of someone we were really happy had died… hehe. Here’s a picture of the invite designed by sister Rat… I composed the poem.

Here are the ladies in a group picture… what a svelte bunch we look like

Here are the men in a group picture… what a posh lot they look like

Then, last weekend my fiancé organised a go-karting event and about 13 of us raced. It was mad. There was only me and another girl and the rest were boys but I only came third last as I managed to beat one boy too. Unfortunately he was a friend of a friend so I couldn’t laugh at him and taunt him appropriately about being beat by a girl!! Just my luck! All this racing was done in some 12 degree temperature and the track was super slippery cos it was so cold and it was at night. When we finished, I thought my fingers would fall off in numbness… if I briefly took my hands off the steering wheel, it was hard to position them again because they were so freaking frozen. So we had about 10 minutes of qualifying and 15 minutes of racing and it quite crazy. By the last few laps, I was craning my neck most eagerly around the last turn in the hope of seeing the chequered flag. After, we went to the city for many drinks and dinner.

So that has been my so-called life for the past two months. Also, any teeny weeny itty bit of motivation I might have ever had to visit the gym in summer has vanished without a trace what with the cold weather and getting home in such complete darkness. Days until daylight savings time begins: 149… sigh!

Wouldn't it be nice to live together in the kind of world where we belong

2007-05-24T11:29:00.001+10:00

You know it seems the more we talk about it
It only makes it worse to live without it
But let's talk about it
Wouldn't it be nice

Dear Penny Lane

So, the other night, us Fort Knox alumni got together for our monthly poker night. The usual bottle of Jack was cracked open and beef tasting nibbles were passed around and good ol’ Fudge, he had a great treat for us… special brownies… yeah, that’s right, don’t look so surprised… talk about being baaad assss!!! Gosh, I remember how you used to smoke it in your bathroom. I’d be all fast asleep in the comfort of your bed and you’d go do your thang and then come back to bed and annoy the crap out of me. I mean, what’d a dog have to do to get some sleep around that joint? So anyway, Chocolate, Fudge and me, we were just shooting the breeze and to be completely honest, we had gotten rather giggly thanks to the brownies, when who should show up but young Ginger. I tell you, I was pretty darn shocked she had the nerve to show up after all the nasty rumours she’d been spreading about Fudge and Teddy all over Dogtown. But we didn’t turn her out because well, you know, she’s a young un’… never had anyone to show her the way really what with her arriving here so young and all and she always had a bit of a tail on her, that she did! So then she broke down with everyone glaring at her and apologised for making up all those lies and it was hard not to melt, that look in her eyes. Next thing we know, we’re all high pawing each other and look up to see Teddy shuffling in in his trademark purple coat, sunglasses and carrying his walking stick. There was a bit of an awkward moment while he took in the scene in front of him but he caught on in no time and enveloped Ginger in a warm hug. Good ol’ Teddy… you don’t live to 90 and become elected the Head of the Underground Society of Dogs Against The Adoption of Cats as Household Pets and not get wise to a few things. We don’t keep these catch ups exclusive to Fort Knox you know… we like to keep in touch with the family dogs too. So sure enough, Max and Dinky joined us and Dinky brought along that grumpy smelly sourpuss Gizmo. I know he’s family and all and that’s why we tolerate him, but really that doesn’t mean I have to like him.

By now, we’d started playing and we were well into the brownies… I’m telling you girl, it was insaaane in the membrane! I should’ve joined you when I had the chance… can you imagine me and you rolling around the bathroom floor in giggle fits!! It would’ve been da bomb. By the way, I don’t know if you’ve noticed but my vocab has gotten way better since I moved here… I know I could just about manage Woowoowoo when I was with you but these dawgs sure know how to teach a beyatch a word or two. My main man is this cat named Snoop Dogg and he has us chanting all sorts of fun stuff like bow wow wow yippee yo yippee yay…

But anyway, back to our poker night. We were playing Texas Hold ‘Em and I was doing alright… even stevens really… so were Max, Dinky and Gizmo. Ginger was down pretty bad, so were Fudge and Chocolate… Teddy was just raking it in as usual. It was a stormy night and it was coming down something fierce when suddenly the door flies open and who should run in soaking wet but Biscuit. Ginger nearly fell off her chair because he cut a most dashing figure with his dark eyes and chocolate fur, engaged in the act of shaking the water off himself. They’ve never met of course… he having lived with you in the early 90s and Ginger only in 2004. It was puppy love at first sight… I felt so very wistful watching them… god knows how different things might’ve been if Scooby from down the road hadn’t been so goddamn obnoxious… I mean, that is what attracted me to him in the beginning but towards the end it just got so tiresome our whole barking-madly-at-each-other-through-the-gate routine. I’ve heard on the grapevine that he’s taken up with a black Lab from down near the supermarket. All I can say is good luck to her.

So that’s really all the news from our end. Things might’ve gotten slightly nasty that poker night when Gizmo and Teddy faced off for all or nothing but luckily Dinky was way past his alcohol tolerance level and chose that moment to return from relieving himself, completely miscalculated where his chair was, and fell flat on his tiny bottom! We were all on the floor laughing after that. Chocolate sends her love as always. How are things going with you? How’s baby sister? How’re mama and papa Lane? Is mama Lane still sadly under the delusion she has any kind of control over the canines she lives with? Ah well, we must leave her with some hope to hold on to, harmless thing that she is. I routinely call Rusty on his mobile to tell him to give ‘er hell and sometimes text him fun ways to make mischief! And what about you then? Still missing me? I know you are. I looked at all those photos of all of us with you the other day. I don’t know if you felt my paw on your shoulder but I was there.

Oh I almost forgot to tell you… I ran into my old man Crispy on the street the other day. He is one good looking mo fo… now I know where I get my drop dead gorgeous looks from. He’s doing alright and invited me to a meal next week. I can’t wait to look at more baby pictures of myself.

And oh, oh, met up with Appachen when he visited Dogtown on a daytrip. I told him I'd be writing to you so he said a big Hi.

That’s it I guess. Write soon and I’m attaching a pic of us from the other night.

Miss you and love you as much as the day I left you.

Holly xoxoxo

Wouldn’t it be nice if they were all living it up like so? Wouldn’t it be nicer if they still remembered us? Wouldn’t it be nicest if they hadn’t had to leave us at all?

Down the way where the nights are gay and the sun shines daily on the mountain top...

2007-05-16T11:07:00.000+10:00

Fiji was freaking awesome. We did absolutely nothing and still every night I’d pass out like a ton of bricks and have a huge issue waking up the next morning which caused my lover no end of grief because breakfast was included in our resort package but well, I just couldn’t motivate myself even at the thought of having paid for it already but somehow forced myself to go at least three of the five mornings after constant wake up calls. Anyway, that was breakfast. We developed a nice routine for the rest of the days and nights too. After breakfast, we’d go back to our room and gather our belongings for the day which would be a book, a sarong, the room key, and the all important towel pass. The towel passes were awesome because whenever you felt like you could get fresh beach towels for the pool and beach so never had to deal with any of those tedious non-5-star-resort issues like sandy towels in the toilet at the end of the day and having to dry them for the next day, having to carry the same towel around with you the whole day, etc. etc. So some days we’d start by jumping in one of the pools or sometimes we’d head straight for the beach. There were three pools – the Coral Pool, Takali Pool and Main Pool. The main pool we stayed well clear of because it was always packed to the brim with easily excitable, screaming, swimming children. The Coral Pool was right below our room and had an awesome view of the coral lagoon just beyond and was quite far away from the main pool so was never very crowded and quite pleasant. Our favourite though was the Takali Pool because it had great sunset views and it was strictly adults only so was most peaceful. We ended most of our evenings here, sipping on drinks and watching the sun set. So in between breakfast and sunset, we’d alternate with swimming in pools, the beach, lying on deck chairs, reading in the hammock, nibbling on lunch, drinking (having our drinks brought wherever we wanted because of the great bar and food service), snorkelling, jet skiing, kayaking (uh yeah, this tired us out fairly quickly every time so we’d kayak for all of 10 minutes) and then our main activity for the day – sailing the catamaran. This became a great cause for excitement as we played sailors with tacking and tightening and what not. We became rather good (well, it certainly ain’t rocket science) but each day made our man more confident and took me closer and closer to that dreaded wave break, you know, where the real ocean starts after the lagoon… the sight of that always terrifies me. Maybe because it reminds me of the outer Great Barrier Reef when we were all playing around in 12 metres or so and a few metres away, the break ominously fell to something like 200 metres apparently. But anyway, we went closer and closer each time until this one time we had the perfect wind in our sails and it was really choppy suddenly in that area and we were coasting faster and faster and suddenly I notice that his side of the catamaran is completely out of the water and in the freaking air and my side is ready to be submerged any second and oh my god, I lost it. I haven’t been so terrified since I’m not sure when… probably since the snake. Anyway, somehow we slowed down and the catamaran returned to its upright position and I insisted we turn around and head back to sweet safe land which we did. Was great fun though, the catamaran… What else did we do… well, the swimming in the lagoon was an experience in itself… the water is incredibly clear and the fish swim all around you in incredibly shallow water, its crazy! The first afternoon we decided to be very adventurous and walk in the water from our side of the resort to the main lagoon beach… this involves crossing many rocks and such and sometimes there’s no beach to walk on so you have to walk in the water and that’s of course when I met the eel. I was extremely terrified to go any further because I really wouldn’t have been keen to meet its friend, the sea snake but somehow made it out of there. I took the inland route on all future occasions and I only had to contend with creepy garden lizards… oh god, and there were regular wall lizards as well... ugggg… creepy bastards! One day we were different and went on a tour to a completely different island… caught a boat down a river which took us to the Robinson Crusoe island, went on a jet boat ride, snorkelled, made some random tour friends, watched some traditional Fiji customs (in photos later) and drank the most potent rum I have ever drunk in my life. It’s called Bounty Rum and it beats even Jamaican Coruba Rum… I had to refill it with more soft drink and it was still incredibly foul and it got me incredibly buzzed. Now, everyone knows I am the last thing from a one-drink-buzz girl so you have to believe me when I tell you how strong it was. So our days were happily spent…

In the evenings, after our poolside drinks and sunset we’d head back to shower and we’d drink our duty free alcohol and listen to music and get quite buzzed, make a ready mix for the 5 minute walk to the restaurants and head for dinner. There were 3 main restaurants open for dinner and of course we tried them all. One of them was the Black Marlin Bar which also served as the resort’s nightclub. God, it was painfully hilarious. The DJ would play everything from Madonna to Harry Belafonte, from the 80s to the 00s, and people would dance. We did our usual jive thing for a couple of songs and beat a hasty retreat. We’d then wander the beach drinking from our ready mix until we were ready to hit the sack. The other two restaurants were Kalevu and Takali and we liked Takali so much we went back there for dinner on our last night. After dinner, we headed to the Black Marlin Bar in expectation of an 80s night, as promised by a poster, but there were all of 5 people and no one seemed particularly into the 80s, so the DJ didn’t even play the 80s and played some horrendous music some guests provided him. But anyway, it was our last night so we made friends with some of the staff and got suitably smashed before retiring. The next day we left the bright blue and green tropics to return to cold, dreary Melbourne. The nicest souvenir from the trip is my awesome golden brown tan that will keep me in the island spirit throughout the paling, non-sunny winter. That, in a nutshell, was our trip and here are some photos…

The ocean view from our room... you can see the "break"... it was low tide so all that brown stuff is coral

The Coral Pool below our room

The beautiful lagoon and main beach... we met the eel somewhere down here when we were walking in the water

Oh god, the EEL in all its creepiness... that's water if you can believe it... it's so freaking clear

Bright blue starfish such as this one were scattered everywhere in the water... again, that's in water

Robinson Crusoe Island where we went daytripping

Traditional Fiji style of cooking on coals in pits... called 'lovo'

Firewalking

Firedancing

Every day they have crab races like this... number the shells of some poor crabs and assign numbers to guests and the first crab to cross the circle wins!

You can't really see, but look closely and you might see the faint glowing blue... at night, the coral was lit and we'd get ocean side dinner tables on the terrace and it was really most lovely

Sunset as viewed from the Takali Pool... it was a slightly cloudy evening though

But I'm sad to say,
I'm on my way,
won't be back for many a day

You’ll say we got nothing in common, no common ground to start from and we’re falling apart. Then I said what about Breakfast at Tiffanys...

2007-04-24T16:40:00.000+10:00

Gee whiz… when things happen, they happen all at once. And sometimes nothing happens at all… like I think I was bemoaning nothing happening in like Feb and then suddenly life became hectic in March and we’re already at the end of April? Did time fly so when I was a child? I don’t think so really… what was life after all but a school timetable and weekends… so now its work and weekends but somehow it flies… I guess, cos there is no timetable. Well whatever, I have lots of updating to do on this blog. The real reason I continue to maintain this blog at all (with everyone on the blogroll being so slack at updating) is so I have a record of my life to look back on in one, two, five, ten, thirty years… it’s amazing the little things one forgets that one never expected to forget but forgot anyway, so the blog helps greatly. I wish I’d had a blog before I left India… I mean, I used to write stuff in a journal before I left India but it’s not the same as recording life events on a blog because a blog is public and a journal is private and I got over ‘Dear Diary, I did this and this and that between 3:00 and 5:00 pm today’ by age 12. So this blog is more like a dear diary in the sense of ‘Dear Diary, I went to x parties this weekend and got wasted at x of them…’ and then I can read these entries at some later point in my life when my life isn’t all that happening and then I can feel nostalgic for the good times and may want to kill myself at being reminded of a better time, but who knows… it may indeed only ever get better (but I doubt it).

So if you’re still reading, I left off at the long weekend holiday? The weekend that followed was meant to be really quiet because of the wild holiday weekend but it ended up that a friend and I met for a quiet drink or two at 5:30 pm on a Friday evening at this delightful bar along my one-and-only-close-to-my-heart Yarra river… by 8:00 pm, we had grown to 12 people and maybe 5 rounds down. And of course, that’s when we should’ve stopped and just GONE HOME. But of course we didn’t and of course we partied on and eventually I think we got home at 3:00 am. This is the trouble with Fridays – you always start off so early because it’s straight after work and sometimes it gets out of freaking control. It was an awesome night though – lots of laughs and tram and China Bar incidents! China Bar deserves a post of its own – it’s a mildly dodgy Chinese fast food place that doesn’t have a liquor licence but serves you Victoria Bitter beer anyway and I’m not a fan of Asian food but I don’t mind going to China Bar once in a while and eating the roti channai, which is like roti and chicken curry but I really couldn’t handle the place in my soberness and so most times we go there when we’re smashed and do crazy things like sing the Indian National Anthem. The rest of the weekend should’ve been quiet, but again, it wasn’t! I think I ate off our friend’s bbq for all meals beginning on Sat afternoon until Sun evening because Sat night he brought it over to our place and I actually spent a pleasant quiet evening by myself watching a Poirot whodunit on TV and then Sun afternoon, we had a tiny bbq partaay to watch the Australian Grand Prix on TV. The race was great, except for Ferrari winning of course. But how awesome is that young little Lewis Hamilton??!! So sweetly and talentedly he’s made it to the podium also every race since.

Then there was a week of work as usual but I do believe a few of us went out to dinner to a fancy schmancy Sri Lankan place that Thursday night and I finished almost an entire bottle of wine so was decidedly seedy the next morning at work. I was meant to go lawn bowling that evening with work but decided to give it a miss and went home to rest and I think slept for 12 hours+ that night. The next day I woke up well refreshed to find out India was pretty much out of the World Cup… Mr. Moonlight had stayed up most of the night to watch the match so was decidedly seedy that day and I convinced him to have an afternoon nap since we were going out that evening although at the time I was clueless about the things in store for me later that night. So then I did many household chores being in a domestic mood and expecting houseguests on the Monday and so forgot to wake him up and he was fully panicked about being late to this thing we were going to which was apparently some work friend of his party type thing. I of course never panic because I am never on time to anything ever! So I was done with my shower and hanging out in the bedroom and cutting my nails I think when I hear him on the phone outside trying to make a dinner reservation??!! So when he comes in I’m like, what’s the deal with the dinner reservation, I thought we were going to a party and he’s all, oh what are you talking about… very lame attempt at covering. But so anyway, I sorta fully guessed then that he was going to propose to me that night because well, I don’t know, I just knew. And then we sat in the car and he played a CD he’d burnt that day and the first song was Penny Lane and that was sooo funny and sweet and typical of him and just confirmed it. The rest of the songs were all the other songs we’ve considered our own over the years… there was Sweet Child of Mine, Can’t Help Falling in Love, She, Annie’s Song, Breakfast at Tiffany’s, Strangers in the Night, and then he drove us to this stretch of road along the Williamstown beach where the waves dash against the embankment and there’s a lighthouse and everything and then on the way he pretended he was making up this poem and would give me two new lines every two minutes but really he’d composed it earlier and had to improvise anyway since he forgot half of it and it was just really funny and sweet because by now I was fully certain of what was coming. The reason for the beach was because we first met at the beach all those years ago (7 years and some months to be precise) at that wonderful rendezvous of our youth, EC-41… Then once we’d parked he proposed and got out of the car and got down on his knees and put the ring on my finger! Ah, the ring… the most fabulous exciting bit to any engagement and mine is absofuckinglutely stunning… I love it… it’s a half carat diamond in a platinum setting and it’s from Tiffanys cos Audrey Hepburn style, I’m just craaaazay about Tiffanaaays! Tiffanys has a special significance in our relationship because right from the beginning we never had anything in common except partying and drinking and smoking, and then we had a fight in the early days and I think this song just happened to play and it made us smile so since then he only has to play this song when we’re fighting and it makes us laugh. So when we discussed getting married and stuff in recent years, my only wish (well, by only wish, I don’t really mean only wish – I’m a woman, I’m allowed to have million wishes and dreams for my engagement and wedding) was that the ring be from Tiffanys! Here’s a picture for you but it really needs to be seen in the flesh.

So there we were, engaged after all this time and it was a wonderful exciting feeling. We went to dinner and called all our friends in Melbourne and met a few of them after dinner and I finished a whole bottle of wine in excitement/celebration. The next morning we called up our families and spoke to a few friends in India and basked in the glow of moving on to the next step, scary as it may be. We also had shitloads of cleaning to do that day because the next day a friend from Brisbane and a few members of his family arrived in Melbourne to stay with us and there was barely any time to think for all the people around us and overseas phone calls to make and receive! That week was a total blur with friend getting wasted every night and me having to work so only got wasted one night mid-week. Laughed a lot that week but I think one of my favourite nights that week was just a random week night… I wasn’t drinking, friend was already down something like 6 beers, haha, we went to dinner and it was pouring that night and freezing cold but still lovely because it was raining because as you may or may not know, I love a rainy night. Then we took a drive and picked up a couple of other friends and there were 5 of us in this car on this rainy night with nowhere to go but aimlessly drive and it was just a total Madras flashback! So we ended up in some random outer suburb and parked in some random shopping centre parking lot to have a smoke and a spliff in the freezing cold (cos we do not smoke in the car, some things have changed from when we were juvenile, mildly delinquent teenagers) and then drove back into the city :-) Was so simple and fun and non-alcoholic and reminiscent of MADras!

So that weekend was my “fiancé’s” pre-birthday bash… it was at the rooftop bar I mentioned a couple of posts ago and was another crazy, drunken night that ended at 4:00 in the morning. That Saturday night was someone else’s birthday party so couldn’t recover from hangover and went out that night too but didn’t drink on this occasion so got home fairly early. Sunday was a day of relative rest I think but don’t fully remember and then Monday night we had to stay up till midnight to bring in his birthday and give him presents although there was nothing major cos he only wanted cash and then the next day was a stressful day at work and that evening went to Guitarman’s house to celebrate Mr. Moonlight’s birthday and also Big City Dude’s birthday the day after so quiet bbq and drinks AND a boob cake :-) I will have to find and post the pictures of that cake… was unbelievably delicious even! The next day, had another stressful work day and hurriedly packed and flew to Fiji that night, but that’s a whole other tale!

Your love is better than ice cream, better than anything I’ve ever tried. And your love is better than ice cream…

2007-04-03T15:34:00.000+10:00

I wanted to write this really long post about the love of my life who very recently (read, 2 days after my last post) asked me to marry him (we can now refer to each other with the “f”iance word) and I said Yes of course and it was completely insane for the next few days with calling and talking to people and then we had houseguests and then we had his birthday party on the weekend and did so many other things on the weekend and today is his birthday and today is also the day work decided to put me in a panic by having to get something done by 2:00 pm and tonight is another little do for his birthday and tomorrow night we leave for Fiji and that made me realise this morning I must absolutely do laundry TODAY if I am to have any underwear for the trip and so many little things to finish before we leave tomorrow night and so on and so forth… but the point is, I love you babe and let’s have a blast together this evening since the day turned out to be such a washout thanks to both our jobs. And the post on how we got engaged and pictures of the stunning ring on my finger will be published next week once I get back from Fiji. Until then, Happy Easter and Happy Birthday love!

So take the photographs and still frames in your mind, Hang it on a shelf in good health and good time

2007-03-21T17:40:00.000+11:00

I just ate about 10 strawberries and was musing on the fact that as a child I was obsessed with strawberry ice cream. And then I remember the day the local ice cream parlour started selling fresh strawberry ice cream i.e. there were little bits of fresh strawberry (but now I wonder, were they really fresh? They must’ve been like dehydrated and frozen and then added to the ice cream like they do with fruit in cereals these days, but anyway) in the strawberry ice cream and my parents got more excited for me than me but it never tasted the same to me again. So now I eat vanilla… it might sound boring but I think vanilla is the most exciting flavour there is… it’s so creamy and milky and tasty… mmm… I also like chocolate and I looooove cookies and cream. I never ever eat strawberry ice cream anymore. But I have become so obsessed with ice cream in the last couple of months… that’s all I want for dessert, ever. Even chocolate doesn’t have the ability to melt my tastebuds anymore… I heart ice cream. I’m not a huge fan of bars and I hate those fruity ice concoctions… what I love is smooth creamy vanilla ice cream (and 97% fat free I might add, the one that I buy from the supermarket) I can scoop into a bowl and add chocolate sauce and rainbow sprinkles too… that’s what I’d do when I’d have the munchies at home and nothing to wake up for the next morning… I would snack and snack and sometimes it’d be savoury potato chips and ketchup or muruku, but a lot of the times it was sweet sweet vanilla ice cream, Hershey’s chocolate sauce and rainbow sprinkles… oh god, it was to die for. Australia, being somewhat anti-America does not sell Hershey’s… can you imagine (don’t really know if it’s related to anti-Americanism in any way but the point is they don’t)? At least they sell Heinz ketchup… I dislike Australia’s version of tomato sauce most definitely… so their version of chocolate sauce is also most disgusting so I just make do with the plain vanilla ice cream and occasionally add rainbow sprinkles… but believe you me, it is never plain vanilla ice cream to me. Sigh… I want to be home raiding my freezer right about now…

So a quick rundown on the crazy trip to Lorne two weekends ago… it was a great trip… I laughed non-stop and pretty much drank non-stop except for the 6 hours of sleep every night.

Word of the trip – Homo… (not in a prejudiced against gay people manner but simply an innocent Eric Cartman manner… oh darling Cartman, one day I will devote an entire post to the hilarity of you)

Drink of the trip – Mojito… (we’d make like 1 or 2 pitchers of cocktails and then get very tired of muddling the ingredients (I own a very awesome cocktail muddle now) so I’d switch back to Bacardi & Coke)

Joke of the trip – JosA and JosB

View of the trip - The view of the Indian/Southern Ocean in all her glory from the convenience of our terrace

Semi-scariest moment of the trip – Oh my god, what is that orange steadily rising up from the horizon??!! It’s an explosion, run for cover… haha (turned out to be a very orange moon… the amazing thing was we found a pair of binoculars in the house and you could actually see the craters on the top half of the moon… intense… imagine a telescope)

Outdoor moment of the trip – Boogie boarding at the beach

Chick flick moment of the trip – curling each other’s eyelashes (I had no clue about the aesthetic effects of eyelash curling – I need to buy myself an eyelash curler pronto), straightening each other’s hair and eye shadowing each other’s eyes… some of the boys were unwilling participants also

Bird of the trip - Kookaburra sitting on the old gum tree... bird with a very discerning palette... ignored all the bread and wasted no time attacking all the ham we gave him

Pictionary moment of the trip – writing down “air” and whispering “peacock”

Randomest moment of the trip – Having randoms buy us drinks at the “club” on Sat night (I use the word “club” very loosely… it was really just one hell of a dodgy as dive), having our Lorne neighbours recognise us and introduce themselves to us (naturally this “club”, the Lorne Hotel, was the only place any self respecting person in Lorne would go to, so everyone and his uncle who wanted to partaaay that Sat night in Lorne, was there… kinda like Madras in some respects, in the G2, EC-41 days), collectively picking up random Kiwi dude and taking him home with us to dice him up and bury him in the backyard (I jest of course… but we did take him home)

Charade of the trip –

Where are you all from?
Uruguay. Where are you from?
New Zealand
Rubbish, you sound Dutch and/or German and/or Norwegian. Tell us really, where are you from?
New Zealand
Fine, be that way. We are of course super hot chicas from Uruguay in South America. Say, let’s talk soccer, patriotic fans that we are…
So how come Uruguayans are not held in the highest regard by the rest of South America?
What? Nonsense… we are wonderful people. It’s the rest of South America that sucks ass
So you all live in Melbourne?
Yeah, you?
Yeah me too (very disappointedly)
Is there something wrong? Would you prefer it if we were all from Lorne?
Yes… haha… I want you to all have been born in Lorne (hahaha, it made me laugh so much at the time)
--half an hour later—
Ok, so we lied. We’re from India.
What? All of you?
Yeah, all of us (sheepish laughter)
Why would you lie?
Why would you lie about being from New Zealand? Come on now, tell us the truth, where are you really from?
New Zealand (in a “why the hell won’t you believe me” tone)

Still don’t believe him, but we’ll see what happens if we ever run into him again. Why Uruguay? Didn’t know, didn’t ask… I was drunk enough to simply go with the flow.

Exercise of the trip – 1km trek down to the lower Erskine Falls and back… God protected me from having to confront any snakes. Thank you God… let’s keep that trend going for all future bushwalking adventures

Picturesque moment of the trip – automatic timer group pictures… 3 in a row and all so it looks like moving pictures… technology, the wonders…

Fiiiiine dining moment of the trip – seafood restaurant on the pier for dinner after 5 straight meals of bread and meat (and eggs for breakfast) on the BBQ… not that I’m complaining mind… it was just a pleasant change.

Laugh out loud moment of the trip – folder or scruncher survey… ahhh, such burning as(s) issues (pun intended)!

Venue of the trip - 38 Great Ocean Road, Lorne... bye bye house

Hungoverest moment of the trip – Saturday morning, Sunday morning, Monday morning and even Tuesday morning ( I dragged myself to work at 11 am on Tuesday after being alcohol free for almost 36 hours)

I feel there are many moments I have missed out, like singing on the balcony and trying to dance backward up steps… and as always, the scintillatingly funny conversations… although scintillating is quite possible misleading… a lot of the most hilarious conversations always seem to begin and end in the gutter. Good times, good times… can’t wait for the next weekend (summer) holiday whenever it may be!

It's something unpredictable
But in the end it's right
I hope you had the time of your life.

We’re all going on a summer holiday, no more working for a week or two, fun and laughter on a summer holiday, no more worries for me and you

2007-03-09T15:08:00.000+11:00

So what if summer has officially ended and a week or two is more like three nights… anytime spent in a rented beach house on the spectacular Great Ocean Road that one has visited way too many times in one’s lifetime although very surprisingly one hasn’t had to make the trip down there in over two years… woohoo… so now absence has made the heart grow fonder… counts as a “summer” holiday. So hello to three days of drinking, partying, eating and chilling… only the drugs are missing… what is this clean me? Well, not strictly, but still… cleaner me!

Do you remember those Cliff Richard movies? This one in particular, Summer Holiday, and the song, I don’t think I’ll ever forget it. I mean, I knew it was an incredible lame, feel-good movie but I still watched it a number of times. The other song of his I remember so well which I think is also from either this movie or another soppy feel-good one is big news, big news, have you heard the headline story, I’m so happy, she’s in love with me. Haha!

Since my last post, I have managed to dodge the boredom slightly by attending Turkish birthday dinners with lethal belly dancers, watching a beer can being shoved up a chicken’s ass and then eating the same chicken once the beer had done its job of spreading flavour and warmth throughout the poor chicken, finishing a bottle of wine by myself at various BBQs as my drink of choice to avoid coke, drinking Mojitos at a delightful new rooftop bar discovery, making my Mom’s signature lemon cheesecake after many years, going to the gym on a regular basis believe it or not to proactively rid myself of the beer gut once and for all and tone those arms and legs, being the subject of a customer "incident" report after a sliver of glass somehow wedged itself into my foot at the supermarket, alas, thoughts of million dollar mental and physical trauma settlements have faded away since the cut healed itself in all of 2 hours, watching the final two episodes ever of the OC on television and almost pissing myself at the Bullit’s sons being named San Antonio, El Paso and Hanoi among various other amusing final moments, getting our row boat caught in a litter trap in the Yarra river and then promptly deciding to swim in it myself, just for a bit of Sunday morning fun… who needs to sleep in on a Sunday morning when really, you could be swimming with the fish and slime and litter and all the various other unidentified objects floating about in that beautiful Yarra. So yes dear friends… our boat got caught and we lost balance briefly and the next thing I know, I’m in the cold, disgusting water. We pulled a huge crowd and some passer-by actually blogged about it, although he obviously arrived on the scene only after the wonderful spectacle of me falling in. Can you believe I had to get back into the boat after falling in? I’m floating about, dog paddling, trying so hard not to touch the mossy slime a couple of metres below me and waiting for someone to give me a hand to pull me out of the water and onto sweet safe land and I’m just being fully ignored… people just continue discussing how to get us out of there and then tell me to haul my ass back into the boat… it was a supreme effort I tell you… I was shell shocked for the rest of the ride. Happy to report though that I have since been back twice and no untoward incidents have occurred. It’s always the question in my mind though… so, will I make it back to the boat shed today dry or soaking wet? Details AND PIX of our incident at the link below…

http://highriser.blogspot.com/2007/02/caught-in-trap.html

So anyway, now I’m off to Lorne so Happy Labour Day to everyone in Victoria… haha, who gives a crap… we have a holiday and that’s all that matters!

Update: How could I forget... I suddenly looked at the date and realised I was blogging on my best friend's birthday and not shouting out a special mention. Dear Sista T finally joins us 25 year olds today as her baby T turned the oh so big and important 1 yesterday! You're always on my mind (at the risk of sounding very Elvis soppy and senti) :-) Have a great one! Love ya.

And time goes by so slowly… and time can do so much… I need your love!

2007-02-23T16:42:00.000+11:00

I am so bored bored bored! This blog is also going to die on me but I’ve been feeling too bored to write even. I was so bored today I went and queued up for some time at this place called The Hub at my alma mater to try and get my long overdue Masters degree certificate even though I knew it wouldn’t be available at The Hub. The Hub was supposed to be this central hub of all student activity but I went there once to register, get my student card, one other time to get an extension for my student card and then maybe one or two other times to look at the bulletin board of stuff for sale… or maybe I did that in the same student card renewal time. I bought one item off that bulletin board – a chest of drawers advertised for $10 by someone named Eddie in Southbank. Oh boy, Eddie… he must’ve spent that $10 texting and calling me to coordinate picking it up and how to get to his house and what not… it was so funny… I’ll never forget Eddie… I had at least 20 messages from him on my phone and I didn’t even get to meet him cos I didn’t go on the actual pick up ride. And then Eddie threw in a computer table worth at least $40 for $5. I guess Eddie just wanted to feel good about making $15 even if he’d spent $10 of it already. I would’ve just thrown it all away. I believe I did throw the computer table away. The chest of drawers I still have but it’s hidden in a wardrobe and stores many papers and things.

But as always, I digress… what I meant to say was, walking through that university courtyard with all the cliques of kids hanging out and soaking in the sun made me feel incredibly wistful for student days long gone by. I wish someone would pay me what they pay me now to just go and attend class a couple of times a week and write a paper now and then… cos that was the only thing missing then… I was dirt poor… how I had to carefully budget things like meals out, haircuts, movies, clothes, and well I’m really fuzzy on the alcohol intake now… can’t remember how often I was able to do it but I’m fairly certain I wasn’t a poster child for teetotalism or anything. Ah, school, college and university… what a lazy race in the sun. But so on the one hand, I miss all of this and would love to go back to being 15, 16, 18, anything but mid-20’s if you like, but also realise it is quite impossible to ever go back. So then I think about the other side of the coin, right, getting older… and I think about this a lot because I have a lot of time to think on my 30 minute trek to work and back each day… man, it better be shaping my calf muscles and ass good cos it ain’t fun leaving work at 7 pm sometimes and having 30 long minutes in front of you before home even though home is barely 2 km away. But again, I digress… so yeah, getting older… you know how people do the whole moan and groan I am so old, I don’t want to celebrate my birthday business (and I have been one of those people on numerous occasions, except for the birthday celebration bit)… well I’m just not buying into it anymore and am consciously going to welcome each passing year until I reach oh, I don’t know, 37! Then I will return to moaning and groaning about how old I am getting particularly as I struggle to keep up with my rambunctious puppies and babies… note, how I say puppies before babies… I’m in no hurry to have a kid but I don’t know how much longer I can hold out against getting a puppy… so many obstacles such as time, space and money (to buy more space) stand in the way. Well that’s the way the cookie crumbles.

So as I was saying about my new aging process outlook… I just feel it’s a bit ridiculous to be calling myself old when I am always the youngest person in any meeting room and sometimes by at least 20 years and even with my current crew I am one of the younger ones at a sprightly 25. One of my favourite phrases for getting old is something like… well, I won’t be a spring chicken forever will I? Quite possibly not, but for here and now, I am most certainly a spring chicken and so proud to be one! Until I compare myself with my 8-years-younger-than-me sister and her peeps but I’m going to try not to dwell on that no more.

So that’s that. What else is happening? Nothing terribly exciting… I guess one of the reasons for why I am so bored bored bored… the weather has been too kind in the last couple of months and now a great foreboding has been instilled in my heart for the ferocity of the upcoming winter. Summer days went by too quickly and funly… But on the topic of seasons, Melbourne weather being as “dependable” as it is, apart from my love for the warmth of the sun and heat and humidity in the air, my favourite season really has to be Fall (or Autumn as it is more traditionally called but I really like calling it Fall better). Why, you ask? Purely because of the multitudes of brown leaves that fall from the trees and line the sidewalks in crisp earthy piles just inviting me to step on them and hear for myself that delicious crackling sound of my foot on a dry leaf. I don’t know what or why… it just makes me so happy and I make it a point to walk on as many leaves as I can… sigh… so great, I have that to look forward to. God, I am slowly going insane.

One other tiny point to make… people in Madras suck! I could be wasting away here of a depressive sadness and loneliness and they wouldn’t even know or care! How hard is it really to drop a 5 line email?! I understand now why both my aunts just went off to the US and never looked back except to their immediate family… can you imagine anyone ever keeping in touch via snail mail? I mean, it happened, and sometimes we did but so sporadically. And only in recent years they’ve gotten back in touch with a lot of people because of email. But what’s my generation’s excuse huh? Could it be any easier than email? Oh wait, yeah, instant messaging! So now there’s no going back to email since IM is no longer available. Shame on my so called friends… I am so pissed off and feeling so unloved from that quarter!

I think I am going to go home now and finish with this painfully boring week at work. Oh I didn’t write about the various concerts of 2007… there’ve been 2 already which is cool. I actually wrote an incredibly drunken 10 page thing about Roger Waters but didn’t end up posting it and I think I will soberly edit it and post it later. I am so glad Feb is such a short month… only 7 more months until September which is when the year generally becomes exciting again.

I have this version of Unchained Melody by U2 – it fucking rocks! Bono just sings I need your love very coolly. Why is he such a cool rocker for such an old one? What am I talking about… all the cool rockers I like are old. So I guess the question is why are there no cool young rockers?! I just remembered that Sista T and I sang this once at college... it was sooooo lame, unlike our I Will Survive of the previous year... Well, you can't win 'em all! But you can certainly try...

I don't quite know, how to say, how I feel

2007-01-07T05:58:00.000+11:00

We'll do it all
Everything
On our own

We don't need
Anything
Or anyone

Those three words
I've said too much
But not enough

Oh my god, this is one of them songs… I haven’t had one of these songs for a while… you know, one of them songs you listen to over and over one night… I don’t know man, I have these songs once ever so often and then for a long time, I completely lose interest pretty much in music all together and suddenly that song comes along that brings it all back… So tonight is one of them nights, and this is one of them songs. It’s called Chasing Cars by Snow Patrol and I’ve heard it on tv/radio/in the stores for the last I don’t know how many months but never had it but tonight I’m just like, I have to have it and so I downloaded it and right now its on iTunes repeat and I guess it will be on repeat until I finish this post… and I imagine that’s gonna take a while. Unfortunately this is the same song that was the finale for Grey’s freaking Anatomy this year in Oz (oh, sorry, 2006, last year it seems) but I hate the freaking show so it hurts that I like the song so much but it’s ok, I’ll adjust for tonight…

Oh right, so first off, Happy Birthday dear friend Rael… we missed you over Christmas and New Years and I guess it’s going to be a while before you’re back again after your jettsetting global adventures… So anyway, I’m just back after many drinks at his birthday party and I thought now is a good time as any to update blog… haha, it’s taking twice as long to spell right, but anyhow…

Where the hell do I begin??? I guess I could begin with the first couple of nights that they got into town (they being Rita and Phil aka auntie and uncle but never wanting to be introduced as such)… oh man, it was the most awesome time ever… they’re the coolest people I know… on par with my baby sister and my baby cousins… and none of them are babies no more… oh god, I miss my family!!! It just went by so quick…

Let's waste time
Chasing cars
Around our heads

I need your grace
To remind me
To find my own

If I lay here
If I just lay here
Would you lie with me and just forget the world?

So anyhow, there was Christmas prep with the tree and presents and shit and then there was Christmas Eve where I forced everyone to stay up pretty much and so we tried to go to Crown Casino and stuff and the whole world tried to convince me not to go to Midnight Mass, but I went anyway, by myself, I might add… It was good though, I sang carols soulfully and missed my parents and sister like no tomorrow and then the next day my mom refuses to even believe I went to Church… geez, I’m a devil, but not that much of a devil that I’d lie about going to Christmas Mass… But anyway, I got home and we all wished each other and then exchanged the few hundred presents we had for each other and it was so good. I got so many cool clothes… I’ve pretty much worn all of them this whole little holiday of mine… Christmas is awesome!!!

Christmas Day was insane in its own little way… I’d had about 4 hours of sleep and then we went to this lunch where everyone was gathering at and oh my god, I drank like 3 drinks of Old Monk which was on offer and then it finished so I went back to Bacardi but basically we were all there from 1 pm until about 7 pm and who even knows what happened in between… This sweetheart was one of the highlights of my Christmas… no other dogs in my life at this point… there’s Rusty of course, but he’s so freaking far away!!!! Don’t worry though Holly, I still think of you evey fucking day… why? Why? Why were you taken away from me?

I don't know where
Confused about how as well
Just know that these things
Will never change for us at all

Then I had about one good night’s sleep after 5 days and Boxing Day I conscioulsy said I would not even take a sip of alcohol and I didn’t and that night we flew to Cairns and got to Port Douglas really late but it was sooooo good to be back in tropical climates… guess what, so called summer in Melbourne, it freaking hailed on Christmas Day… too depressing! The only thing I don’t miss about tropical climates is freaking lizards… gross as “pallis”… gross man, they creep the shit out of me… But anyway, we chilled on the beach, we ate some awesome meals and then we went on a tour to one of the outer reef areas… I tried scuba diving and unfortunately for me it didn’t go so well :-( The water just went fully into my nose everytime I tried so I didn’t do it eventually and went snorkelling instead and went on some strange ocean walk where they put this space type helmet on my head and I walked about 6 metres down the ocean floor and it was just quite mad… it was stupid man, I was just like, what the fuck is this shit… but I got to touch some fish… haha, don’t know if I ever wanted to touch fish… anyhow, the Great Barrier Reef is awesome… and the warm water is unbelievable… the last day we went on some Rainforest tour and went on a cable car ride a couple of thousand metres high and it was pretty fucking scary! And then we took some scenic railway and I think I saw some Aboriginals in Australia after 4.5 years finally! The trip was soooo good… I’m sooo going back and I’m so getting certified to go diving so I’ll have more time to get used to the breathing underwater crap!

Then we got back to Melbourne and had a whole other kind of trip… haha, I so don’t want to talk about it… I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again… there are some trips better left unsaid!!! All I am willing to say is how much sense Penny Lane by the Beatles makes now!!! And I am sooo Penny Lane!!!

If I lay here
If I just lay here
Would you lie with me and just forget the world?

Then there was New Years Eve… I suppose it could be considered rather tame compared to various other years… but it was great… all our near and dear ones in this city were around us! I had a great time… one of the best moments was talking to baby sister dear when we were almost going to bed at 5:30 am and it was just her midnight then. Man, I don’t know how she’s going to grow up without me around… I don’t know if I’m a positive influence, but I’m certainly her older fucking sister and that has to count for something… well, I’m not around either way, so I just have to cross my fingers and hope for the best!

And then there was New Years Day where I walked around in a daze and we went to Mexican Margarita dinner and then we went to a drive in movie and I freaking slept and I don’t think I’ve ever slept at a movie before, drive in or otherwise, so believe me when I say I was fucking done to have done that! And then there was their last day where we went to the wildlife sanctuary and I finally got to see a freaking kangaroo after 4.5 years… I don’t quite know how to say how much it meant to be able to finally see one… and they are so freaking adorable!! And then we got fucking wasted that night and then they left :-(…

All that I am
All that I ever was
It’s here in your perfect eyes
They're all I can see

I so don’t enjoy being at work right now :-( Life sucks when you nothing and no one to look forward to!!

Man, it’s 2007… we can’t even pretend to be little kids anymore even though that’s all I’ll ever be at heart… what’s up with this shit that we have to pretend to be responsible adults… and I don’t even mind being a responsible adult… but, it just sucks when your age and the year kinda dictates that you have to be one… 18 til I die baby…

If I lay here
If I just lay here
Would you lie with me and just forget the world?

This song makes me so sad though… I don’t quite know why… it just reminds me of a time when it wasn’t like this… of course, at the time, I wasn’t satisfied at all… all I wanted was to get away… I guess, just forget the world… but it was that same time that so many amazing things happened… I remember some days, I’m not sure what we did but I know we laughed a lot and the hours just went by so quick and we thought it was never ever going to get any better and maybe it hasn’t… and I remember some nights, the first few times we went out, we went to dinner each time and then we’d buy a quart of Old Monk rum each and get fucking wasted on that one little quart… and then we’d pick up some friends who’d we give some more quarts to, haha, and then we’d go to EC-41 and we’d both get in for free because we were cool that way… that’s a whole other story, how I got a lifetime free membership to EC-41… it’s a brilliant story, but not tonight… so then we’d be in EC-41 and most nights most everyone else was there… but there were some nights that it was pouring down rain and hardly anyone’d be there… but we were there… and we’d dance and we’d sing and we’d drink and we’d smoke and we’d laugh our asses off… so it isn’t as easy as that anymore… nobody does the same shit anymore… there isn’t the one place to go to anymore, the one place that is guaranteed to get you into a good time…

Forget what we're told
Before we get too old
Show me your garden that's bursting into life

I don’t know what’s going to become of us… I mean, at one point in your life you’re so used to having a certain group of people around all the time and then one day that just doesn’t happen no more and maybe you get a different group of people and that’s also just wonderful but what about that first group of people? How do you get them back into the groove? Because you miss them and love them like you did when you were 18-20??!! But perhaps they don’t remember it like you do, and it’s as stupid as chasing cars to them to even imagine that it could ever happen again! I’ve been having these dreams these last couple of weeks, all filled with old times and old people… such good times… and this is at a time in my life where I’m completely enjoying my current life (apart from work of course)! I don’t know, I wake up highly disturbed because I feel like something’s gone terrribly wrong in my hometown and there’s nothing I can do to make it ok. I swear, it feel so real I honestly wonder what happened that I should dream of all of them so vividly… these kinda dreams haven’t happened since the first time I left India all those years ago.

I guess right now I’m sorta just hoping for good things whenever it is I get to go back again… I mean it’s always good, everytime I go back, but sometimes it just fucking kills you… I mean, it can only kill you when you’ve been away… but it fucking kills you anyway… but I love them all… and I miss them all… and that’s my utopian dream… that they could all be here with me…

If I lay here
If I just lay here
Would you lie with me and just forget the world?

I don’t quite know how to say how I feel… I’m still listening to the stupid song and it’s daylight now so that’s freaking great… I guess I will try to just not sleep until later tonight I think cos I gotta go to work early tomorrow morning anyway… But so, I was just flipping through the few hundred photos from the last 10 days and it just has to make you smile doesn’t it… the way people look in them… so happy… maybe they were drunk at the time, and sometimes they weren’t, believe it or not… but we all look so freaking happy… and a lot of the New Years Eve ones, we’re just kinda sticking our hands up in the air with the Christmas tree in the background and lots of crazy light effects happening because the fancy ass camera wasn’t on auto focus and it’s just funny… it’s just a perfect reflection of how people feel/felt/will feel… I hope it’s a good year… for everyone I know and love… something tells me it has the potential to be… the year a lot of things change for a lot of people in a good way… we’re getting old man, and there’s no denying that! I’m no longer early 20’s, I’m mid-20’s, my boyfriend will be “late” 20’s after his birthday this year, poor guy… but it’s ok… I think we’re entering a completely new exciting phase of all our lives… Happy 2007!!!

I don't quite know
How to say
How I feel

There’s something wrong with the world today, I don’t know what it is. Something’s wrong with our eyes. We’re seeing things in a different light, and

2006-12-20T16:24:00.000+11:00

Bushfires are a way of life in Australia particularly in the dry summer months. So normally you hear about it in the news and you feel sorry for the loss of wildlife and property and sometimes human life but mostly it’s as remote as the monsoon floods in Bombay or the hurricanes in the US. But not this year… this year is looking to be the biggest bushfire season in I’m not sure how many years and they are predicting these fires will go on for the next three months and a few millions of hectares of lands will be destroyed in the process. But what is really really frightening is how the smoke from these fires burning a couple of hundred of kilometres away has been consistently making it to the city at least once a week until the wind changes again. I am looking out my window and literally not able to see beyond a couple of blocks... the smoke has been getting into the ventilation systems of all the buildings and there’s this constant burning smell in the air and sometimes our eyes water… and this is us, sitting here safe and sound in the urban jungle… I can’t even begin to imagine what the fire fighters and other rescue workers are going through on the front lines and all the other affected communities and towns. And everything goes back to climate change and global warming… I remember in class 8 or 9 I wrote a critical composition on global warming and my teacher said it was damn good… I don’t think I chose that topic, it was just given to us but I can’t even remember what I wrote. What on earth could I have known about global warming then? I vaguely remember something about the ozone layer and now at 25, that’s still all I know. And that the big giant hole in it is right above Australia! So as distant as the effects of global warming and climate change are predicted to be, they’re already here. And let me tell you, walking on the streets when its 35 degrees, with the sun being blocked by a grey ash smelling canopy of haze is incredibly eerie. Almost like a ghost town…

But on to cheerier topics… like Christmas… what an incredibly cheery time it is… they call it the silly season and we have been having the silliest times with Christmas and birthday parties galore. At my work one which was an all day thing at the Yarra Valley which is a premier wine district close to Melbourne, we had like a mini Olympics thing all afternoon and me, little ol’ unfit me, managed to scale a 12 metre rock climbing wall. It was insane… like getting off the ground was hard and then I just kept going and suddenly I’d get stuck not knowing where to move my hands or legs next and I’d just hug that freaking wall and say, fuck, what now??!! But eventually I made it to the top and abseiled down and it was just awesome. So…never say never! Then they tried to convince me to join the company’s girl’s team for a triathlon next year which includes a 400m swim, 4km run and 10km bike ride and in the rush of all that adrenalin I said yes. But having had time to reflect and return to my lazy unfit lifestyle, I have completely changed my mind. But anyway, my team which was Team White won pretty much all the activities and so we won the whole thing and we all got little Christmas hamper thingies as presents… they have some awesome presents/events at this new workplace of mine. We got overnight type bags as our Christmas presents and had like two Christmas parties and then we’re constantly being invited to smaller team bbq’s, coffees and lunches. Like today, we had a coffee catch up as part of one team and then I went to a team lunch as part of another team. Good fun it is and tomorrow is my last day before heading off to Christmas break so even better.

Outside of work, attended various other sessions… went to a Christmas party like no other complete with Bad Santa and dirty as Christmas carols… was so funny. I got a lovely Santa hat with lights all around it so with batteries, I was lit up like a Christmas tree. Oh my god, I have so had it with shopping… shopping for people, shopping for the house, even grocery freaking shopping, when will it all end? I have been to the stupid shops pretty much every day in the last two weeks and I am so over it. I hope I don’t have to shop until June next year at least (although we all know I’ll be back at it long before then…)

So aunt and uncle have made it to New Zealand and will be arriving here tomorrow evening. Tomorrow is my last day of work before 10 sweet days of unbridled relaxation and entertainment. The four of us are heading up to Port Douglas on Dec 26 for some sun and sand and a long awaited glimpse of the Great Barrier Reef – so I can cross at least one of the natural wonders of the world off my list then. And then we’ll be back here for New Years… last year Goa, this year Melbourne. Different, but should be good still.

Last year this time I was in Madras and fully revelling in all the food, fun and attention. This year, I feel more remote from Madras than I’ve felt in a long time. There are always periods where I lose complete touch with what’s happening and feel disinclined to make an effort to find out because it’s nice for someone else to make the effort for a change.

The thing is though that home is where the heart is and my heart is still firmly ensconced in the house I grew up in and the room my sister now inhabits, with my parents and my baby sister and the can’t-live-without-‘em four legged friends. I posted a Christmas card to my parents today and when I was picking it, this one said something about thanking them for making Christmas so magical when I was a child and it’s amazing how thoughtful they continue to be even now and oh my god, it was all I could do to fight the tears back being in the crowded store and all (well, a few escaped) because every word was true and I feel guilty sometimes that I just don’t let them know how much they mean to me and take them for granted and even get really annoyed with them when spending long periods of time with them in the same house. So if they read this blog, they would know but of course they don’t so I hope the card will suffice.

Merry Merry Christmas and see you on the other side of 2007.

Can you hear me when I sing… you’re the reason I sing… you’re the reason why the opera is in me…

2006-12-06T15:28:00.000+11:00

So November has also passed. I honestly can’t account for how quickly the days are flying by. It seems like just yesterday I was shopping for my trip to India but that was a whole year ago. And this year, there will be no India. There will most likely be no India next year either so that kinda sucks.

The other day was the first day of December. It was also the first official day of summer and at least the last evening in November provided a warm welcome to this season unlike the so-called spring which was really just a horrid extension of winter this year. So that evening at a balmy 30 degrees, we sipped Coronas on the balcony and then took in Borat at the cinema. I don’t know how to comment on this movie… it certainly had its laugh out loud moments but mostly it was just crude and well, if you’ve watched a lot of the Ali G shows with Borat clips, you know exactly what’s coming like when he goes to a formal dinner party and what kind of polaroids he’s going to show of his life back home.

But getting back to November, time really flew because I had way too many things on with the concerts, changing jobs, slacking off at home in between concerts and jobs, etc., etc. So to the concerts, I was left with Pearl Jam and U2. Pearl Jam was awesome in a very oh-my-god-he’s-so-insane kind of way. He started off all normal concert-like but by the end he was not even pretending to be sober anymore and just fully skulling straight from a wine bottle and jumping all over the place and at one point he fell really badly but just jumped right up again. Oh, it was truly entertaining. People say the Red Hot Chilli Peppers are mad to watch on stage but I watched them live in 2002 and they don’t even come close to Eddie. I have Jeremy recorded on my phone from that evening!

Then 1.5 days later, it was time for U2. Numerous die-hard fans began queuing at the venue in the wee hours of Saturday morning. We knew we had no chance of competing with that so we got pretty drunk and stoned instead at my house and only got there about 6:30 pm. We found ourselves a whatever spot (I say, whatever because it was no great shakes and I couldn’t directly see the stage, only the screens, but seriously, as much I enjoy U2 and all, I have no desire to be crushed in by some mad people...) and made some trips to bar/bathroom before Mr. Kanye West got on stage. Of course, everyone sang along loudly to Gold digger and then fully lost interest… haha. In between Kanye and U2, there was some 45 minutes of set up and I went to the bathroom in all this and was in such a tension that I’d miss their opening song which I knew would be City of Blinding Lights but anyway, all was good and I got back well in time. And then they were on…

Fuck, it was awesome! I don’t know what else to say. I just didn’t want it to end… I knew every single song except for one song but the videos for that song were so tripped out, it didn’t even matter. It was such a perfect night – there was U2 singing the bestest songs, all the ones I wanted, and it was a warm night so the dome of the venue was open so I alternated between looking up at the screens and up at the stars… Bono was a dream, The Edge was brilliant, Adam Clayton was the furthest away from me and rather in the background, and there was Larry Mullen Jr. beating away at the drums with a really sweet smile on his face the whole time and with his military cut blond hair looking like a poster child for the Germany Army. He is my current favourite of the band – he has two Labs who he has dedicated albums to… so sweet. So anyway, I had goose bumps most of the way and shed a tear or two here and there and just remembering it now is making me feel all funny… was just so good. Obviously I was very happy with City of Blinding Lights, Sometimes You Can’t Make It On Your Own and One, and then he played With or Without You and I swear there were shivers running down my spine the whole time. The final song was Kite and it was sooooo good… and I knew it was the last song so that made it extra poignant and he kept singing, I know that this is not goodbye… I sure hope it ain’t… come back U2, come back! So, that was that… I have City of Blinding Lights and One recorded on my phone from that evening.

So the next big milestone was that I started my new job and then that weekend we went camping to Wilsons Prom which is the southern most tip of mainland Australia. Never been there before and never been camping before and both were great experiences although our roughing it could hardly have been considered roughing it. Still, we did the whole tent bit and it wasn’t our fault toilets with hot showers are conveniently located 200 metres from all campsites and that Big City Dude brought his beloved bbq along and kept us happily supplied with hot dogs and rissoles for all our meals.

So we also attempted these hikes to some beaches and up some mountains and all. One of these beaches is called Squeaky Beach because the sand allegedly squeaks when you walk on it, and it actually does. It’s awesome! The second day we hiked up some Mount Bishop and a dreadful little black snake crossed the path in front of me… now, it’s hard to fully express how absolutely I detest and abhor all things reptilian but snakes, in particular. And so, it was my greatest fear something like that would happen and of course it had to. So next time, I will say come on out, snake and meet me if you have the guts to and then maybe I won’t have to face it. But on Saturday night, when I was walking back from the toilet with a trusty torchlight in hand, a wombat crossed the path in front of me and that was pretty cool. We spent Sat night singing loudly around the lantern (unfortunately it’s bush fire season and campfires are a strict no no so we had to make do) and then went to bed relatively early cos of exhaustion from previous night drinking and early morning start and wilderness trekking. But the stars that came out that night were a sight to witness… Starry starry night only!

In other news went for a Jamaican themed birthday party last weekend and I have to say I was very hopelessly dressed and looked most un-Jamaican but birthday girl had done much decorating and had some horrid looking dreadlocks for extra measure. But the bestest and funniest part was the batches of special brownies that had been prepared and oh my god, it was hilarious. The thing is we’re used to it and we still got so fucked and laughed so much and there were all these other people who never smoke and went a bit mad (in a hilarious manner) and then apparently there were also people who ate nicely and had no idea they were special. Far out man, haven’t laughed so much like every 2 seconds in so long. So, today is her birthday and since she reads this blog apparently, Happy Birthday Ms. Jamaica and welcome to blogworld… hehe!

This week I decided to take another health and fitness stand and went to my apartment gym for the first time in 3 months and worked out a bit. And then last evening I went rowing, my second time in Oz, and arms and back are feeling slightly fucked and the constant friction from the oar has torn a sizable chunk of skin off my thumb… ouch! But seriously, I compare the Yarra with the Cooum and they’re not that different… perhaps one just smells a bit less than the other.

And finally, a moment to reflect on Christmas which is fast approaching… this year I will be here of course and will have two members of the family with me apart from my boyfriend and it should be really good and I know it’s going to be a bumper year for presents cos my aunt always buys me awesome clothes. And I get to trim the tree again and I’ve gone out and bought lots more Christmassy stuff and I have my work Christmas party on Friday and various other Christmas things planned and it should be great!

Tomorrow I start at a client site so I don’t know when I’ll be back again but I thought I’d better update it before it died on me fully for the year.

I’ll be home for Christmas, if only in my dreams

I’ve found a way to make you smile… I count your eyelashes, secretly…

2006-11-14T16:35:00.000+11:00

The other night I watched you while you slept… I tried to count your eyelashes… I didn’t get very far… So I kissed your cheek instead… And found a way to make you smile…

A song for no one's in my hand A song they'll never understand Till I have gone And tomorrow brings the sun

2006-11-13T16:21:00.000+11:00

From night skies dressed in clouds
Morning came, your taste in my mouth
I like the way that your hair falls down in your eyes
And you blush when you smile
When sleep combs your side then far away flies

I love the way that you stare when the sleep fills your eyes
So yesterday has gone
Who knows, tomorrow may bring all we'll desire
Tomorrow brings the sun

Kiss the world with fingers crossed
I've kissed the world with fingers crossed
I've been praised
I've been cursed
I've been blamed
And I've won
And I've lost

On waves that fill your heart
The future glides
I hope the serpents in the tide
Are all gone
What's done is done

A song for no one's in my hand
A song they'll never understand
Til I have gone
And tomorrow brings the sun

I’ve had this list of songs my whole life (well, it keeps getting added to) that I’ve always fantasised my loved one would serenade me with. Well, if not serenade per se, think of me whenever it plays and dedicate to me by explaining why it reminds him of me. I would feel strange to publish this list to him (cos that would be crass) because it happens that I listen to a song and think he should somehow read my mind and know too that that song was written for me and tell me so… . The list is long and varied… most of them are vague like this one… a song for no one… and then are the ones about women and relationships like Woman by John Lennon and She by Elvis Costello and then there’s Always A Woman by Billy Joel. I remember we were listening to it on shared earphones on our way to work one morning when we still had to travel 45 mins by tram and I explained how I wanted him to sing it to me because couldn’t he see, it was completely about me (it’s ok to be crass once in a while). So he said, not to worry, Billy Joel himself would sing it for me. This is true. I watched Billy Joel live in concert on Friday night. I’d like to tell you about my terribly exciting gig calendar but I am strangely not in a mood to crow about my love for U2 (although, believe me, I do love them)… I’m in a very vague mood… this could be because I’m finally moving on to bigger and better things. The risk with bigger and better things though is you just never know how really bigger and better they can be. And sometimes they’re neither.

Wow, Shakin’ Stevens and Give Me Your Heart Tonight just started playing. That’s another one. And I Love You by Saigon Kick. And The Way You Look Tonight by Frank Sinatra. And then there’s that other completely random Jesus of Suburbia by Green Day. You know, I was thinking about the bands I still have to watch live and I’m only missing Paul McCartney, R.E.M. and I realised that I would very much love to watch Green Day. And my aunt and uncle insist Beck is a must see but I don’t think I’ve heard any of their music in ages. Not that any of these people are coming over but they might. Modest Mouse who I really really liked for a while is playing on Dec 29 but I won’t be in Melbourne. The Killers wouldn’t be bad either.

Alright then… since I started talking about music I might as well talk about the concerts I’m going to watch/have watched in these two weeks… Billy Joel last Friday night, Pearl Jam this Thursday night and the grandest finale of them all, U2, baby this Saturday night. Oh, and I might as well throw in Roger Waters on Feb 1, 2007. Of these, I am more excited by U2 than I thought possible because I hadn’t even listened to my How to Dismantle an Atomic Bomb LP that I received as a going away present from work in MARCH until one drunken Thursday night two weeks ago. And on that same night, I listened to the whole album once and then I listened to City of Blinding Lights for three hours perhaps… and believe you me, with an LP this is no easy task… one has to manually go over and position the needle every fucking time! But so seriously, until last Thursday all I wanted to watch U2 for was One and possibly With Or Without You and all the other randoms like Streets Have No Name and Sunday Bloody Sunday and everything but I really only cared about One. This is of course until I heard City of Blinding Lights and I will throw a severe tantrum and go into a dark depression if I do not hear them play this live after all that. I mean, them playing One is a given… it’s going to be a total final encore type song with the lighters in the air and everything. So yeah, we’ll see… either way, it’s going to be an awesome week.

Actually, it’s been pretty good for the last two weeks too. I heard some great news the previous Thursday and in preparation/anticipation/celebration had many drinks on Wednesday and Thursday night (the same U2 marathon Thursday). Then I took an extended break from work from Friday until Tuesday and luxuriated on the couch on Friday and accessory shopped for the house on Saturday and Sunday and did many household things on Monday and then Monday night arrived. Two legendary progressive DJs named Sasha & Digweed graced these shores… in fact, they graced the club right outside my house which was just an added bonus… I went for Sasha last year but apparently Sasha & Digweed together is an unbeatable combination and so went fully prepared for the time of my life and I have to say, I think I had it. I think there are some experiences better left unsaid because it is impossible to try and express with words how one really feels. I have had many such moments where there is always an overwhelming factor like the music or the lights or the people or the emotion and with one big whammy, I’m left speechless and either want to laugh or cry and sometimes do both. That Goa one on New Years Day 2002 and Roger Waters singing Comfortably Numb in Bangalore and some rainy and non-rainy moments heavily intoxicated and dancing under the moonlight with Mr. Moonlight and Mark Knopler playing Brothers in Arms in Melbourne and well, you get the idea…

Billy Joel was great. I never even fully appreciated how freaking brilliant he is on the piano. And when he sang Uptown Girl, I was so very very happy :-) That song, goes back so many fucking years, it's crazy. Of course the second encore finale was Piano Man and I have it entirely recorded on video on my phone… only, my voice singing along is seemingly louder than his… haha…

So, the days are blurring from one to the next as I wake up late and choose whether or not to come into the office… most mornings in the last two weeks, my head has had a light drum and bass band playing a welcome for the first two hours of the day and my throat has cried out in pain until I satisfied its demands for the elixir of life… The nights have been flying by with the aid of all manner of intoxicants and then there has been U2 and Pink Floyd at the crack of dawn.

Funny thing about U2… I've been an unconscious fan my whole life… When I listen to their Best of 1980 to 1990 CD, I can't help but associate memories with the entire CD… cos it would play in my car, over and over and over… as I drove through the hot, humid, dusty, streets… to college, to entertainment, to shop… the scorching sunlight abated somewhat by the air conditioning and the sunglasses…

Sometimes, as I drove home at evening or night, still humid and dusty but allowing a faintly cool breeze to come in by rolling the windows down a crack, belting out… walk on by, walk on through, walk till you run and don’t look back, for here I am… and at a lot of these times, I was hurrying home because I had the munchies and needed a food fix ASAP and all the frying smells in the air on the way home would drive me insane cos have you noticed that Madras (and quite possibly, India) smells of food everywhere you go… sure, there’s pollution and cow dung but heading home on the main streets, passing by the tea kadais and the street vendors, its impossible for that smell of something deep frying in oil to not come wafting across the cars and pedestrians and cows and noise…

And then a lot of the times, as I sat there stuck in traffic, outside the back entrance of my alma mater Good Shepherd and inching forwards towards Sangeetha’s and I’d be singing out loud as I tend to do in the car and people around me would sometimes give me amused glances and sometimes I’d be amused too and smile back but mostly I just tuned out and lost myself completely in whatever was playing… and then before I’d know it, I’d be over the Chetpet bridge and into the relatively sweet release of Poonamallee High Road… once I got to Annanagar, I always had this thing about the home stretch… it was my own special route from just before the infamous Annanagar Roundturner (which is pronounced by all and sundry as “roundtana”) to home a couple of blocks away… it was a major timesaving escape from the traffic at the Roundturner and it was down some peaceful streets with lots of trees and beautiful houses… and then this time I visited, they had concreted the main road so you couldn’t turn into the street anymore… the home stretch has never felt the same since.

So U2 were there and you were there too, and us, and them, and now U2 will be here again this weekend and I’m gearing up to bawl my eyes out because the beauty of it all will just kill me. And no one has put it better than I believe the Grateful Dead when they said…

What a long strange trip it’s been!

Spinning away, like the night sky On a hill, under a raven sky I have no idea exactly where I've been Some kind of change, some kind of spinning away

2006-10-26T16:47:00.000+10:00

My last wild weekend in pictures (seems like eons ago now)… my first theme party in Australia I might add… Some kudos to myself (yeah, bring on the self congratulatory wishes) and fellow organiser Flowerchild.

The invite (designed by yours truly)

The banner (also me)

The party favours (some crappy $1 nail polish inside each takeaway box… it was really just for effect. How we attempted to draw martini glasses on the side with glitter glue and we found the most adorable martini glass stickers… but it was madness as we tried to finish all this at the 11th hour. Oh, lets not forget the thank you tags (thanks to Rat and sister Rat) and me maliciously mutilating it with a fork until Shutterbug came to the rescue with hole punch, blue tac and various other amenities.)

The video of NYC and Melbourne city images in the background (by Flowerchild… to set the mood)

The light bathroom reading

The food (yeah I apologise… you can’t really see it… but believe me when I say it was all very New York and hors d’oeveish. It was really cheap and easy too except driving what seemed like miles and miles to the little Middle Eastern bakery in the middle of nowhere for the mini quiches. How some people find these spots I don’t know but I nearly killed a few people turning into it. Yeah, goes against middle of nowhere if there were people to be killed but it’s complicated.)

The cocktails (of course, the best part… we had Apple Martinis and the signature Sex & the City drink, the Cosmopolitan. I know in my last post I said something about the tequila high… well the cocktail high is similar and much much better… I was floating… all night… brilliance… don’t miss the name tags so people didn’t lose their martini glass)

The bride

The hostesses

The girls (well, some…)

The dog (awwww…)

The boys (they had a stripper but from the pictures she looked old and boring… of course, they will beg to differ… in this pic, they’re pretending to be pirates, I don’t know why)

The merge (like on Survivor, but funner (I don’t believe that’s a word)… total chaos ensued… we ran out of all our booze and took to swigging straight from the Baileys bottle and some boys mixed tequila into the rest of the cocktails and boy was it foul… it completely messed some people up too)

The club (we went to this place called Marakesh which played the most awesome house and there were some incidents along the way as usual… let’s just say henceforth I will maintain a safe distance between my head and all things metal (cab doors, for example)… the club was a real blur… I was later told I consumed a shot or two of tequila which some people thoughtfully bought for everyone… this may or may not be true. I’m not even entirely sure how so many of us made it there cos it was in some alleyway and I guess there must have 1 or 2 less drunk people coordinating… I know that I will never be able to find the place again… I only remember dancing… and jumping up and down in happiness… and walking home in the freezing cold with the rain pouring down around us and ruining our fabulous dresses and high heels… and I also remember looking up at the heavens in wonder and delight… and laughing… and laughing…)

It was a perfect high and a perfect night. How come they all don’t turn out this way? I shouldn’t ask such silly complaining type questions… the truth is, I have nothing to complain about… except for a few dry spells here and there, the majority of my life has been pretty damn awesome.

On a completely unrelated note, I just walked through Myer which I tend to do when I need to go anywhere because once you get inside Myer, you can walk about 3 city blocks without having to be outdoors and on days like today that have a mild wind chill factor (ha, Melbourne weather does not understand the meaning of the word ‘mild’… it is either blistering heat or bone chilling winds) Myer is a most handy indoor route. So anyway, in Myer, they have already set up their 100 or so Christmas trees much in advance for the Christmas season. I’m sorry, but October? That is way too early even for me.

Hey Mr. Tambourine Man, play a song for me… I’m not sleepy and there ain’t no place I’m going to

2006-10-11T18:16:00.000+10:00

This life of debauchery and excess on the weekends is taking its toll on my aging quarter century old body. My weeks suck ass because, did I mention I’m not happy at my job? Yeah, that’s going to be a bit of a recurring theme for a while. But the weekends, oh boy, where do I begin. I left off at my birthday weekend and then two weeks and weekends have passed already? The weeks are a serious haze of recovery from Saturday nights.

So the weekend before, I decided I couldn’t spend money (because have I also mentioned that my new house and furniture have destroyed me financially… me,… who always had thousands of dollars so safely saved up and now only have $50 in liquid cash to last me till the end of Oct) and couldn’t buy a bottle of alcohol (cos no one else in this crowded world drinks Bacardi and I’ve really had it with trying to switch to whiskey… all I get for my efforts is a mild headache instead of a buzz)! So I took stock of leftover booze from my party and the only thing on offer was tequila. So I thought, why not… awesome plan… a few shots and then we hit the bar where the birthday party is and I’m set for the night… also shots, so no coke or anything fucking things up… won’t even need to buy drinks later.

Plan worked brilliantly… some might say too brilliantly. There was me and Mr. Moonlight and Sam and Guitarman and I got them into the shooting spirit too, so it was 4 really wasted individuals who made their way on foot across the river and into the crowded noisy city (was Grand Final Night – Grand Final refers to the finals showdown of Aussie rules football which is bigger than Christmas in Victoria). Smashed as I was, it was a really perfect high… felt on top of the world and in the bestest of spirits… even made a speech for the birthday girl about our school life together and a certain fancy pencil case she had that I was highly envious of in class two (this speech has now been spread far and wide… stupid fuckers). Now, don’t think I just stood on top of a table and said hear ye, hear ye and started reminiscing… far from it… I was “requested” to make a speech… and the tequila helped mightily with the public speaking aspect.

And then at the very early hour of 1 am or so, we chose to leave for our general health and well being… actually I didn’t want to leave but then, I never want to leave if I’m having a good time… and staggered home and had numerous adventures on the way… like, for real… Walking home drunk is awesome… and I love how much I’m saving on cab rides.

Sunday and the week that followed was too dreadful for words. Actually that weekend, on Friday night I stayed up late and practiced guitar scales and chords for many hours and believe I have made a breakthrough (of course, haven’t been near it since)… I can play Last Kiss and Tambourine Man albeit with 5 second pauses every time I need to change chords. Actually it started cos I was just browsing channels late at night and the only thing watchable was this movie A Lot Like Love… and towards the end (I missed the first half hour), Ashton Kutcher serenades this chick with the guitar and he plays I’ll Be There For You by Bon Jovi (and he played it exactly like I’m playing my Last Kiss and Tambourine Man, I might add… but of course, it’s a movie ahd he’s an actor) and suddenly I got all nostalgic for Bon Jovi and his power ballads… I’ll be there for you, these five words I’ll swear to you… and Jon Bon Jovi has always been about living and dying for you and what not and I’ve always known that’s incredibly cheesy but by god, there was something about his voice and the way he sang and his music videos and I guess the way he looked himself, that I just believed him. I believed true love could be suicide and that I’d already cried a thousand rivers (and I was what, 14 or 15?)… and if any boy had come to me and said or even better, sung… baby, you know my hands are dirty, but I wanted to be your valentine, I would’ve forgiven him anything and everything and considered that the single most romantic moment of my life. :-) And the truth is,... baby... you’re all that I need.

So I don’t know… I’d forgotten all about them and at one point I lived and breathed and sang only them. So, now I’m listening to the songs again and they’re sending little tingles down my spine… well this hotel bar hangovers whiskey’s gone dry… tonight I won’t be alone, but you know that don’t mean I’m not lonely… I’ve got nothing to prove for it’s you that I’d die to defend… I’ve made mistakes, I’m just a man… If you told me to die for you I would… What tragedy, what drama and then always hope… We’ll find a place where the sun still shines.

So I didn’t mean to talk about Bon Jovi so much… I guess some memories from another age of listening to Keep The Faith and Crossroads every night before falling asleep (and singing along really loudly too) and every morning while getting dressed, have resurfaced and just needed to be laid down on (electronic) paper. My own personal Bon Jovi teenage angsty anthem from this period was Runaway. Gee, there was no Google then either… all the lyrics had to be painstakingly learnt by heart with the CD on repeat or written down and memorised with pause and play being hit every 5 seconds… I’d like to have that much time on my hands again… :-) It was a great life, a perfect time…

So the desire to be able to play I’ll Be There For You and other such greats as Livin’ on a Prayer got me to pick up the ol’ six string and try my luck… I’ll get there… eventually…

I wanted to tell you about this weekend and the absolutely insane crazy wild Saturday night but I might save it for the next one… besides, I’m still waiting on a lot of pictures… lazy bitches!!!

But one other tiny thing about that weekend… on the Sunday I watched the first three episodes of Star Wars for the first time in my life… I haven’t even watched the original trilogy… I just automatically tuned out anytime anything remotely sci-fi came up in the past (although I did go through a Star Trek phase very briefly but that was only cos I probably needed a break from Bon Jovi and there weren’t all that many options on a Saturday night on our beloved Star Plus). But so, I somehow got into watching the first one and I was riveted… it was a marathon on tv and by the time I got to episode 3, I knew that Anakin was going to become the evil dark lord Darth Vader or whatever but it didn’t make it any less painful to watch his slow downfall. Why Ani, why? Haha… I kinda get it now… the obsession for some people… I don’t think I want to watch 4 to 6 though… the dodgy special effects would just piss me off and I know the story anyway… or maybe I will… who knows…

You know, my Bon Jovi companion was always Aerosmith… it’s amazing… with the blink of an eye you’re 25. At least, I let the right ones in…

Go, go, go shawty It's your birthday We gonna party like it's yo birthday We gonna sip Bacardi like it's your birthday

2006-09-29T12:41:00.000+10:00

I have never been so de-motivated before in my life. I thought I’d sunk as low as I could go at the last job but this new one is freaking unbelievable (except for the pay). Someone, help me escape please??!! This week has just been beyond awful and I’m soooo glad it’s Friday!!!

I don’t know if I’ve suddenly become super popular or if our little world has widened its borders considerably but it seems like I haven’t had a quiet moment on a weekend in more than four months. I’m not complaining or anything… after all, this is why I whinge and whinge about missing Madras so much. But I’m just finding it a bit unusual here. I had to ditch my parents also on two nights when they were here because of social engagements… haha… social engagements… of course, they don’t mind. In Madras, they’re used to just catching brief glimpses of my sister and me as we rush between numerous social engagements… haha… social engagements.

So, my parents… what a trip that was. I am not conventionally close to my parents… I think I stopped talking to them for a few years between 13 and 18 – there was some serious bottled up teenage angst. And I think about it now, and I’m still not sure if I really had anything to be angsty about or if it was just pure drama because I felt that was how a teenager should be – moody, rebellious and monosyllabic. But this was only at home right… I was the total cheerleader prom queen singing club president at school… I got involved in anything and everything… a lot of the times because I really enjoyed it, you know, like singing and acting and all… and other times just to alleviate the boredom of school by being involved in everything. Oh man, I’d love to tell you about my holier-than-thou Convent school one day… but not today.

So anyway, the relationship improved drastically since I moved away from home and last year when I went home I was shocked at how mellow and complacent they’d gotten with mini me (my friends would call her that because she’s often a spitting image)! And she like totally rules the roost at home… I mean, come on… I might’ve paved the way and everything but she is like in a totally different league of getting her way.

But so apparently I totally bossed them around on their visit and I’m like, well, did they not boss me around for the first 20 years of my life? The tables will always turn. My children will surely boss over me… or not… I’m not as easy as my mom. But then again, there was Holly and Chocolate and Rusty… one puppy dog look and I’m wrapped around their paw. Children quite possibly have the same power of the puppy dog look. But anyway, they fully exaggerate – I did not boss them around. And did I mention that in general, my parents are quite nuts. They’re not into formality of any kind and sometimes when my father speaks, I want the earth to open up and swallow me whole. And my mother is SMS trigger happy and it just totally killed her she hardly had anyone to SMS.

I was certainly pampered to a certain extent. My mom cooked a few meals and my dad took us all out for dinner all the other meals and I’m still happily living off leftovers – I never want to cook again… sigh :-S

They also bought me two more items of furniture and patience dear reader, all will be delivered and set up within the next two weeks and then all photos will go up for public viewing.

Anyway, they’ve only hopped across to New Zealand and they’ll be back in all their glory in a couple of weeks.

So my birthday week was lots of fun… with my dad around there’s drinking every night but of course I can’t really get drunk, not that they’d notice really… went out for dinner on my birthday eve to the Mexican place and downed a whole pitcher of Margaritas and then we stayed up as usual until midnight and my parents insisted on staying up too and then I got all my presents and cards. Had the day off on my birthday after two years and spent it very lazily and then had to get everything ready for the party.

The party was quite mad. I measure its success by the number of people who were beyond the limits of wastedness… someone kept forcing these strange shots called Jager bombs into my hand at the pub we went to after my house. Now there’s this Jagermeister stuff and what I think was happening is that you get a mug of beer and a shot of Jagermeister and you have to drop the Jagermeister in the beer mug (it makes the most delightful sounding plop) and drink it together as the potent Jager bomb. It was great fun even though it tasted like shit. I couldn’t do more than three.

Here’s a sneak preview of the house… haha… the dining table all set up

My huge ass cake…

The next night went to someone else’s house party and met two adorable Labs. One of them just chased people with a plate all night and since the other one was a guest, he very reluctantly had to stop following the other one around every time his owner called him. Oh my god, I miss dogs!! I don’t know that any dog of mine could ever be so well-behaved though – they would just be my ruination with their puppy dog looks.

Spent this week recovering and another action packed weekend ahead with left over painting, another birthday party and general planning for a bachelorette party the weekend after. So if there is plan anytime between now and January, please book me in now only (I don’t know who I’m talking to since only three people I know in Melbourne visit this blog)!!

Remember when you were young, you shone like the sun. Shine on you crazy diamond…

2006-09-27T12:20:00.000+10:00

Yay… I have been tagged… just when I was beginning to doubt my popularity in blogworld with no one tagging me :-( But, I have to ask, why is it 8 things about oneself? I don’t know if I have that many things to say… or maybe I have more. Let’s see how it goes…

I love my new phone so much I want to make babies with it. On Friday night, I was treating it like a real person and flipped it open every time anyone said anything exciting… and did I mention I can have any mp3 as my ring tone just by copying it over from the computer (look, these things have probably been possible for a long time with other phones but its my first time, ok?! Till now, I had to make do with Nokia standard ring tones… for some reason I couldn’t even download ring tones)!!! And, I have a guitar theme set and every time I flip it open and snap it shut, there’s a cool little guitar strum. Oh my god, my phone rocks (as does my boyfriend for getting it for me)!!
I care about stray dogs with no one to love them a hell of a lot more than I care about homeless people.
I am convinced I’m going to die of a slow, horrible cancer death one day but that doesn’t stop me from drinking, smoking cigarettes or smoking weed!! I have this great hope that a lot of people our generation have that someone somewhere will invent the miracle cure by the time all this shit goes down. I am also convinced I will have diabetes but that I can blame on heredity at least!!
At least twice a year my parents ask me when I’m getting married so they can plan and give people overseas enough notice and I just tell them that I haven’t even thought about it and will make up my mind in a year or so… I’ve been doing this for at least two years now and they’re getting more and more paranoid and advising me about biological ticking fertility clocks and they gasp in horror when I say there’s certainly no way I’m having children until I’m 35. The thing is I’ve already decided the year I’m getting married and I’ve already told my family and friends overseas to keep the year free for a trip to India and I’ve even planned little details in my head like what music will play when I walk down the aisle and what the wedding invitation will look like and I’ve decided to have my first child when I’m 30… ok that’s only 5 years away… scratch that and make it 31. So I’m not sure why I want them to be the last to know like this?!
I am the polar opposite of an atheist and fully believe in God and Jesus Christ and the Catholic Church and Heaven and Hell. Each day more (I am not sure if that phrase makes sense) that I live in sin sends me one step closer to Hell and sometimes it really keeps me up at night when I can’t get to sleep. And believe me it’s not as simple as saying Sorry to the priest at Confession.
Earlier this year, we decided we’re moving back to India in 2 years. At the time, it seemed the most obvious decision and I didn’t even have to think about it – it just felt right. Ever since, I have been having such a good time in Australia I’ve started having all these doubts like will I find a good job with a kick ass salary, will I be able to work those long 10 hour days and 6 day weeks, will I even be able to communicate properly with this maid I want so desperately considering my really sad level of Tamil, etc. etc. I’m not changing my decision but making this kind of decision always opens your eyes to the little things you love so much about a place. When I knew I was leaving Madras, I fell so madly in love with it. I know I’m leaving Australia and I’m falling madly in love with Melbourne and am already looking forward to trips I’ll make here once every few years. The grass man… why does it have to always look greener when really it’s all the same kind of muddy brown??!!
A certain addiction has bloomed very late in life for me… it’s called shopping! I’ve never been this way before. A huge aspect to this was money… I loved getting new things but if I knew I didn’t have money I wouldn’t even bother with window shopping. But ever since they started paying me oodles of cash at this new job, a long suffering caged animal has been set free and my mind says be still, my spending heart. After one such shopping expedition, Mr. Moonlight politely pointed out that I’d spent more in one afternoon than the average Indian worker makes in a year. This made me feel bad for about 2 seconds before I set out on my next romp – hey, I got the cash, I’m gonna spend it. The thing is though I’ve always had hoards and hoards of clothes – I just love clothes and because I have so many I don’t wear a particular item often and so it doesn’t get washed that many times a year and so I still have tops in mint condition from when I was 18 (and they do still fit!!). Clothes I know I will absolutely never wear again I donate but these 7 year old ones that still look good, I still wear now and then. But this addiction only became painfully apparent in the last two months when I couldn’t get my monthly clothes fix anymore because I had to save all this money for the outstanding payment on the house. So I avoid going into all clothes stores now – it’s really hard because I walk past a lot of them every day. And the other day I drove my parents to the mall and guess who ended up buying anything? I’ll give you a hint – it wasn’t the holidaymakers. But on this point, I have to say I’m not a shoe fanatic like most women. I have about 10 pairs that I use on a regular basis. Surely most women have at least 30? But anyway, I had to get my monthly fix from somewhere these last two month and it’s called furniture… muahahahahaha… unfortunately for poor Mr. Moonlight, he had to contribute towards this fix of mine too!
When people say way to go on buying your first home so young, I kinda shrug and say, yeah well… But inside I am secretly more proud than I’ve ever been before of anything, that I owned my first home before I was 25. Now I’m just hoping I won’t have to sell it by the time I’m 26 the rate at which I’m spending :-)

So to pass on the tag, I tag Tartrazina, JR, Jay, DnA, AB, Jax, The Box and Wanderstruck… I hope at least two of you do it!

When Im tired and thinking cold (substitute with feeling old) I hide in my music, forget the day And dream of a girl I used to know

2006-09-22T12:24:00.000+10:00

I closed my eyes and she slipped away

What am I doing blogging on my birthday? Well it's like this... my boyfriend and friend have abandoned me for work/student pursuits and my parents take like forever to get ready when they're on holiday!!! So I thought, now is a good time as any for the pearls of a quarter century of wisdom to pour forth... Yes, I laugh too at the pomposity of the last statement!! What pearls? What wisdom? Is there any such direct relationship between age and wisdom? I don't really think so... I think the only great thing about age is the pragmatic way you begin to start looking at things that just never used to happen when I was 10 or 12 or 14 or even 18. Those are the girls that slipped away.

So maybe that's what wisdom is... who knows, who cares. All I know is I'm 25 and certainly not feeling as exuberant as I normally feel on a birthday but I could be feeling this way just for the sake of drama also... :-)

There's just been so much happening with my parents' visit and work and what not. Tonight is big party as usual and will update next week on all the events/presents/etc.

But I just have to say, I am the proud owner of a brand new Nokia 6131 (courtesy Mr. Moonlight) which is one of them flip ones and I've just been dying for a flip phone for a while and this is the first time in my life I'm owning a funky phone while the model is still new and funky... haha... I love my new baby and will christen it sometime...

Happy Birthday baby sister!!! (well, when she was just 17, you know what I mean, and the way she looked, was way beyond compare)

I get by with a little help from my friends… I get high with a little help from my friends… do you need anybody...

2006-09-07T12:51:00.000+10:00

Dandenong Road is slowly receding into the background… the big move was begun on Saturday evening and completed on Sunday night at about 10:30 pm. Right now I cannot walk without bumping into some item or the other. I have too much stuff… I’ve always known this but this time has scared even me. And I have thrown/donated all I could… and I am the most sentimental of people and will keep even one ugly button if it was presented to me with love and affection by someone I love and have affection for… but this time I was merciless when packing and threw away a lot of junk that let’s face it, I was never really into and only kept because it was presented… my adoring baby sister has given me a number of dog curios over the years and yes, baby sister, I love dogs and you bought me these things so lovingly because you know I love dogs… but I think you also know I only love real dogs and only big ones at that so sorry fake dogs, but in the rubbish go you. And stuffed toys… don’t even go there… mostly from my father… dear man always bought us something on Valentines Day that invariably involved a stuffed animal… and when I was tearing the room apart sorting through things, I found so many of them and they just annoyed me no end… that someone dear has bought you these things and there’s really no room in your life for tacky sentimental items anymore because it just won’t suit the décor and they’re just one more dust trap making your cleaning life that much harder… so I just threw them away… one after the other… and my farewell speech was “go f*@# yourself teddy bear”!! Like I said, just finding so many of them and having to throw them away just really annoyed the hell out of me… Haha, I also found these really dreadful unidentifiable stuffed items from the Royal Melbourne Show we went to in 2003… it’s an annual fair and we went that year on my birthday thinking there’d be some cool rides but the rides were really really sad… and people have actually died once or twice because they’re so old and faulty… but we decided Mr. Moonlight absolutely had to win me a stuffed toy as they do in Archie comics and of course he spent more money trying to win than those miserable unidentifiable stuffed items could ever cost… but it was just for the fun of it all… anyway, I said “go f*@# yourselves” to them too… they were like bright orange and pink and really did not look like anything remotely human or animal.

Anyway, finally everything was moved out after some 300 trips… and we hired professional cleaners, thank god… cleaning the old place would’ve just about finished me off this weekend… not that I wasn’t completely and utterly exhausted anyway… but I saw it all clean and smelling fresh and compared it with the new place that doesn’t have one square inch of free space at the moment and smells strongly of paint, and I just wanted to throw myself on the newly steam cleaning carpet and go to sleep for a week!

So yes, the painting… what a far out experience that was. It was really hard work but also lots of fun… I’ve decided it’s going to only be a once in a lifetime experience though. But then again, we are now indebted to everyone who helped us and if ever they decide to paint their own house, we will certainly pitch in… but after our little experience on Friday, I think everyone is well aware of all the pros and cons… So we started at 2 pm and finished around 2 am… I didn’t even know I had it in me to keep at something for 12 hours… it wasn’t a perfect job… tons of touch up work to be done… but we pretty much painted everything we set out to paint… except for my dark trim… sob sob… sacrifices had to be made… that is my own personal project but and I will make it happen!!! But most importantly, we couldn’t have done it without all the wonderful people who turned up to help us (and also to help us move)… only some two of them know of this blog, but anyway, thanks guys! Maybe I’ll tell you about them… I’d be quite interested to see what I have to say about them myself because most of them are people I’ve met here and haven’t really spoken about before in terms of what they’re like…

We had the day off on Friday for the so called “settlement” of the house and to begin the painting… so we started off by picking up our perpetually jobless friend… let’s call him Sam. He’s not unemployed but he’s a student so he only works part-time and has Fridays off and class like once a week or something… he’s not really a new friend. He was Mr. Moonlight’s friend from college and I’ve known him for as long as I’ve known Mr. Moonlight… he is, of course, best friend, recently departed housemate, and in general our fellow Madras person… we partied our asses off together, drank shitloads of rowdy rum together, smoked shitloads of weed together, hung out with a lot of the same people at all the same discos and parties, and met up every single day for an afternoon smoke and then we’d go to Coffee for cold coffee… oh man, I miss the cold coffee at Coffee… by the time he arrived in Australia in 2004 he’d quit smoking weed which was a huge shocker and had taken up smoking cigarettes like they were going out of style which was a bigger shocker and he’d also switched from rum to whiskey… why am I the only one who still loves rum?? So he was housemate until a few weeks ago and we had many fun times here too… and we actually smoked hash together the other night… it was my first hash night in Australia… apparently its really expensive but some friend of Sam’s had some… so we smoked lots and Sam eventually passed out cos it’s been a while. Anyway, that’s our friend Sam…

So the three of us went to Amici and ate the usual and waited for the agent to ring and say settlement had happened so we could pick the keys up. This settlement is a big anticlimax. The previous day we went and left the cheque for the remaining amount and that’s all… there was no formal signing over/handing over of keys or anything. I was quite disappointed. So when she finally rang, we just looked at each other and said Homeowner… we just did that the whole weekend… I like saying it… homeowner… hehe… I want the MSN emoticon for hehe to go here… you would only understand if you saw it bobbing about… Rat and I chat on MSN everyday and almost everything we say is followed by a hehe…

Anyway, we arrived at new apartment and the first person to arrive to assist was photographer by profession pal… let’s call him Shutterbug. Shutterbug is my friend from school days and he is of the alcohol/smoke/drug free variety… he gets very high on life though and if you were ever around in Madras between 97-99, you might’ve noticed the guy with the chessboard shaved into the hair or sometimes the concentric circles, dancing near the speakers at a party or disco… he was perfect designated driver and he would insist on walking us girls to our doorsteps even if it was after dropping us off from rowing at 9 in the freaking morning!!! But that’s Shutterbug for you… his charm lies in his old fashioned chivalry and other eccentricities… :-) so he read my blog last week and called to offer assistance and I was quite happy to have him along to bring some method to the madness… he’s always been quite good at bringing method to madness…

However, this painting an apartment thing is no easy job and by about 6:30 pm, we weren’t even close to halfway done and Shutterbug had to leave and we awaited our second shift of happy helpers. First among these was the guy who used to live in Geelong… he now claims that Melbourne is the Big City and Geelong is the City of the Future… hehe… I have decided anyhow to name him Big City Dude on this blog… he spent his childhood in Africa, his adolescence in Kiwiland and moved to Australia about 3 years ago which is when we met him through common friends… I am at quite a loss to describe Big City Dude… he is at once most hilarious and fun and also quite peculiar and random… I think the hilarity for me lies in all the peculiar random things he says… at a lot of the times we hang out, you will find me simply shaking my head in wonderment at his newest bizarre theory… he had a metaphor once about dance performances and group emails… I won’t even try to explain… but he did follow it up with a short demo of classical Indian dance and by then we were laughing too hard to care… hahaha

Next to arrive was fellow blogger and Beatles enthusiast… you will find him under Blogger Buddies as Rael Imperial Aerosol Kid and this is some arcane reference to something I’m not very sure about so I have decided to name him Guitarman on this blog… he has another new nickname that is really most amusing but he will probably kill me if I publish that on the world wide web so I will refrain… Guitarman is also from Madras but we only met him in Melbourne and it’s really one of those random small world chance meetings… Guitarman and Sam used to be neighbours as children or teenagers many many years ago in Madras and one night Mr. Moonlight, Sam and I were chilling on some bench in the city hungrily eating our subs after an evening of watching Saturday Night Fever – The Musical… hehe… I’ve forced these boys to do many things they wouldn’t normally do ever… but guess who ended up shaking their booty through all the musical numbers… but I digress… so Guitarman was going to cross the street and he was with this other friend of Mr. Moonlight’s and mine from Madras and we yelled out her name and we were just talking and next thing we know Guitarman and Sam are all over each other like ants on a jar of honey… of course, I exaggerate… but so anyway, long story short, Sam and Guitarman got reacquainted… by general proximity and love of all things alcoholic and herbs, Mr. Moonlight and I also became friends with Guitarman… and naturally I have named him Guitarman because he plays the guitar really well and I cannot count the number of singing sessions we’ve had… the latest song he’s learnt is One and since that is currently everyone’s favourite song (I’m not entirely sure why) we just force him to keep playing it… Oh, and Sam, Big City Dude and Guitarman are now housemates and they’re the cutest little family ever… sometimes it’s hard to see the jar of honey because of the ants all over it… kidding, kidding!!!

By about 8:30 pm, the base coat was mostly completed except for two bedrooms but we’d also ditched base coat for a few of the living room walls because they’d been painted recently. This killed my obsessive compulsive Virgoan trait of everything being done exactly the same way but fatigue and common sense prevailed…

Enter two new labourers… she is a bohemian free spirit type video editor who I met through common friends and he is her boyfriend who I’ve only met twice so can’t really say anything about him except he seems really nice… I shall name her Flower Child… I’ve only been hanging out with her in the last five months or so and the first time we were both totally wasted so I thought, well here’s a chick I can finally drink with. Alas, the next time she was drinking Bacardi Breezers… and I said why, why, why would anyone do this? And she said, we drink for very different reasons Penny Lane… it seems she drinks because she likes the taste. I know there are lots of people who do this, women in particular… I am just so not one of them. Anyway, it kinda works that she’s not that drunk while I’m always super toasted… she faithfully listens to all the extra shit I have to say when I’m drunk. When two people are really drunk it often happens that both of them say a lot of shit that neither of them pays much attention to.

Oh, I forgot to mention… at some point in the evening, 24 bottles of beer arrived… I had grave concerns about drunken helpers spilling beer on the walls instead of paint but an admirable job was done in spite of the beers going down like water. I didn’t drink because I found it way too hard to hold a paintbrush in one hand and a beer bottle in the other and simultaneously climb onto the stool to reach the upper wall.

By about 10:30 pm we reached the last stage of our painting marathon… the soothing Beige Drop was on most of the walls and only the skirting and corners and edges needed to be completed as also the feature wall. Our final two helpers arrived bringing a fresh second wind with the rest of us being totally over the whole thing. He originally studied with Mr. Moonlight for the final two years of high school in Madras and then came over to Australia for his undergrad. They had completely lost touch and they both got the surprise of their lives when someone in common reunited them in Melbourne in 2002 when we arrived… Madras is just the smallest little village I tell ya… that’s why I love it and why a lot of people hate it… She is now his wife and they started going out about five months after we arrived and just tied the knot a couple of months ago in a civil ceremony… that was their first wedding… they’re having two more weddings in Delhi and Malaysia in November and I really really wanted to go but many constraints have held me back, the strongest of which is finance. So now they keep referring to each other as oh, my husband, oh, my wife… kinda like our homeowner thing… and I just find it really funny… I shall name them Bonnie & Clyde… no reason… that’s the first ‘couple’ name that popped into my head…

So finally we packed it all in by 2:00 am… the last wall to be painted was the feature wall… I applied the inaugural strokes of the delicious Palm Sugar and then went off to start cleaning and left the rest of the crew to finish it up… I didn’t take any pictures because at the start there was nothing to take pictures of and at the end I was covered so much in paint I wasn’t going to let my fingers anywhere near my camera. Also, I really want to finish all the touching up and the dark trim and receive all my new furniture first and set up the house really awesomely so it looks likes a picture for one of those Home & Country magazines.

But anyway, it was fun :-) And these friends of ours quite truly rock!

I remember when, I remember, I remember when I lost my mind… Does that make me crazy… Probably…

2006-08-29T14:51:00.000+10:00

You know you’ve reached a different phase in your life when little Do It Yourself (DIY) home projects get you all excited and keep you up at night.

Well, don’t get me wrong… I am and always will be a wild child. Even when I am a tottering old grandmother bouncing a grandchild on either knee, I will be saying “Bring on the drinks and let the good times roll…”!!

But ever since we paid the deposit on the apartment, all I can think of is how to do the place up, what to buy, where to place it, etc. etc. And it doesn’t end with this apartment… I’ve been glancing through a few home design idea books and I’ve picked up a huge number of ideas for that ultimate dream house of mine that I intend to start building in less than 10 years.

But that’s some time away. For now, let me tell you about all the things I’ve been doing in the last month in preparation for this big move into the new place. So first I said, well now I surely require some new furniture particularly since I now have two spare bedrooms to furnish.

When I was a student I had absolutely no furniture… we slept on a mattress and I had a $5 computer table and $10 chest of drawers and we had some other miscellaneous dining table/desk/shelves/TV table/low bar stools items that totalled $100. We also had some mattresses lying around the living room which is what we sat on… I’m not sure where these came from. We certainly didn’t buy them.

Then once we started working, we decided to buy furniture… but furniture, even cheap furniture, when you try to buy it all at one go, is really expensive. Anyway, we went and bought a two-seater couch, a couple of chairs that were more like outdoor furniture lounge chairs, a couple of lamps, a proper home entertainment stand, and a bed. My father visited and slept on my mattress and said that mattress was going to kill me as it did his back and he bought me a new one. He also bought us a bean bag which I love – its bright green and yellow and made from vintage 70s fabric – I really need to get it fixed though… it has been looking most limp for many months.

So now it is time for me to completely upgrade my living room and get rid of the remaining reminders of Ikea which I truly hate because it is too closely associated with being a frugal student… if you look at any uni buy/sell website, all you’ll see will be Ikea bed for sale, Ikea mattress for sale, almost new Ikea couch, as new Ikea potato peeler… yes, potato peeler… there are people who try to sell every last item in their house before they return overseas.

So anyway, the couch we upgraded a month or so ago. We bought a really nice dining set a year ago… it was such a good deal and it’s still being sold in store at almost the same price a year later. And now, I have bought a few other items, the biggest of which is a brand new bedroom suite so I can put my current bedroom suite in one of the spares. We have upgraded to a Queen size bed… I am looking forward to the extra room :-) The most annoying thing about ordering furniture is that everything takes about 6 weeks to arrive. So now I have only received my bar stools which are so yummy looking and this weekend we pick up the bedroom suite but I have to wait I’m not sure how long before I receive my new custom fabric armchairs and funky coffee table and these are really the items that will tie my living room together. Haha, watched a bit of The Big Lebowski the other night – when his dirty old rug gets peed on, his friend keeps saying ‘that rug really tied the room together dude’.

So that’s on the furniture side… there’s still plenty more items I’m planning but for now this is all we can afford. Furniture is still really expensive especially since we aren’t even going in for the cheaper Ikea options… Mr. Moonlight has decided he is carrying around this furniture with us to wherever we go for the rest of our lives. Mr. Moonlight also forcibly closes my eyes if we drive past a furniture/home improvement store...

On the DIY side, we went to check out the apartment again a couple of weekends ago and saw it all empty and as happens with apartment inspections, you will never fully notice/remember important details about the comfort, etc. of an apartment until you live there so it’s always a huge gamble. Anyway on this visit, we found out the previous tenants who’d lived there for FIVE years had decided not to give a damn about anything, particularly cleaning, and the walls looked awful and the carpet was downright filthy. The carpet, I’d always been quite sceptical about the colour and intended to change it as soon as we saved up for it and the walls Mr. Moonlight intended to paint before we moved all our stuff in.

So I started choosing paint colour schemes and was absolutely certain I wanted a feature wall and finally have chosen the combination below. That’s not my apartment, just from some paint website and the dark trim looks uneven cos I hurriedly did that in Photoshop.

So in the last two weekends, I have found out all there is to know about paint. I understand the basics of colour theory and primary and secondary and tertiary colours and what not and I know what kind of sheen level of paint is suited for what kind of surface. The only thing left to do is go in and paint the damn thing which is planned for this Friday. Every paint expert we’ve spoken to in the shops has said at least a weekend is required for a whole apartment by a professional. But us amateurs have ONE afternoon/evening… the voice in my head says, “Be afraid, be very afraid”. And we will literally have no choice but to watch paint dry.

We would’ve had at least two days if we hadn’t gotten overexcited and signed up for new carpet also. So the paint’s gotta dry before the carpet layer arrives on Saturday morning. But I’m really happy about the new carpet cos now the apartment will feel almost new with new paint and carpets. I now also know a lot about carpets and the difference between polypropylene, nylon, wool and wool blend. I have been introduced to underlay, broadloom meters, and dodge beige. We just walked into a couple of carpet stores to get a quote and before I knew it, Mr. Moonlight and Carpet King started heated negotiations with the full-on numbers on paper being passed back and forth thing and we became the proud owners of new carpet.

So this weekend is going to be very hands on with painting and moving and it’s all gotta happen seamlessly or we’re screwed. I intend to take before and after pictures and hopefully it will come out looking like how it does on those DIY TV shows. If not, I will not be putting up any pictures.

And finally, thanks to all of the above, I am more broke than I have ever been… and it doesn’t end here because there’s still more things to buy like linen and bathroom and kitchen accessories AND my parents are coming to visit me in 3 weeks…

As the voice in my head keeps repeating, “Be afraid, be very afraid”.

Me and you and a dog named Boo…

2006-08-24T12:34:00.000+10:00

People actually read this blog it seems :-) Got a few messages of sympathy and surprisingly from a few non-bloggers as well. So I’m still sad and now I’ve been remembering more and more little things about her. I remember that time when we were renovating and she had to stay on at home in the midst of all the workers and rubble and dust for six months… she didn’t really mind… she had company… but she’d go nuts when we visited her… one time, we were still in the car with the windows down and she just leaped into the car from three feet away through the window… and after the first three months of living with aunt and grandparents, we moved into this apartment just down the road from my house… it was about 10 houses away but it was still down the road and you had to take a left… and I don’t know how, but somehow she found her way there and she’d run up the backstairs and whine at the back door until we let her in… she did this a number of times while we were living there and she always found her way there and back… cos, I’m sure she tried even when we weren’t home… she was one smart cookie and she was the most relieved when we all moved back in with her and everything got back to normal.

And this other time when I had friends over, she ran out and Holly ran out too but Holly came back and warned me and so my boyfriend (who shall hereafter be known as Mr. Moonlight (also a song by the Beatles)) and Kat went down the street in the car to get her and Kat gets out of the car and politely says to Chocolate... "Chocolate, get in the car please. Chocolate, get in the car.." and Chocolate just looks at him as if to say "Are you for real, dude..." And then Mr. Moonlight had to get out and forcibly pick her up and put her in the car. This story is not so much about Chocolate as it is about Kat but it always cracks me up.

And now I’d like to share some thoughts from my aunt and uncle on Chocolate’s passing that really made me smile.

So sorry that our friend Chocolate has left but we imagine she is having a great party with a host of her friends—Uncle Ralph, Appachen, Teddy, Dinky, John Lennon and so many more that were dear to us. Gizmo says he doesn’t like all this talk about our friends leaving as he is very hesitant to go to the other side! But he sends you a sloppy, smelly kiss and an equally smelly fart as that is how he consoles himself in times of sadness (ask Mama, she will tell you all about him).

And from Uncle Phil…

As Rita says, Gizmo is hesitant to cross over to the other side—but he definitely has one paw in the grave. Teddy keeps coming to him in his dreams, bringing messages from the other world. Sometimes they are cryptic—like the one where Teddy was wearing a astronaut suit and carrying a case of beer—but others are more direct, like when he told Gizmo that Dinky recently persuaded Uncle Lon’s big red dog to join him in chasing celestial butterflies. So Uncle Lon — almost always accompanied by his trusty dog—went looking for his furry pal. He was supposed to usher our Uncle Ralph to the Uncle’s Banquet (Teddy said they serve every uncle’s favorite dish—every time—and the food is heavenly at that), but the two uncles went looking for that big red dog together instead. By the time they caught up with the red dog, they had to settle for some chaat and hot dogs on the roadside (but even roadside fare is divine where they are.)

Anyway, Gizmo suspected something was up with Chocolate, as Holly told Teddy to hold all of her calls as a new guest had arrived.

That’s all Gizmo told me. Then he fell asleep and is dreaming now as I type this.

They’re mad… they’re coming to visit me in December… I can’t wait. Oh, and Uncle Ralph was Phil’s uncle who passed away recently and Uncle Lon is a family friend uncle they met when they were visiting India and apparently he had a big red Irish Setter he was very attached to but I have absolutely no recollection of this dog. Anyway, both Uncle Lon and the big red dog also passed away some years ago. Dinky was Rita’s dog and Gizmo’s best friend and Teddy was my first dog who died a few years ago. Gizmo is the only one still soldiering on… he must be at least 13 years old and he can’t be left alone and he goes to doggy daycare when they’re at work. He was even in therapy for a while… he has a lot of issues… he’s taken the skin off my nose whenever I visited him and annoyed him… and he hated my sister… haha…

This is Gizmo. He looks dead, but he’s not.

P.S. I was going to title the post something else and then this song played on Party Shuffle... Celestial forces at play courtesy Teddy??… I’d like to think so.

Little wild one, I’ll come back to you

2006-08-22T15:33:00.000+10:00

Chocolate has died… she passed away quietly on Saturday morning… she was 10 years old… she was the most loyal dog a family could have… she loved us all as we loved her… she watched as we welcomed dogs to the family and she watched as their time was up before her… now she gets to join them all in doggy heaven…

Dearest Chocolate

You were my best friend for all the years you were with me… I was in madly in love with you to begin with… you entered my life at a time I really needed you… you were funny and naughty and mad and that’s why I called you my little wild one… do you remember me singing that to you all the time… surprisingly, after we welcomed a little puppy who was even naughtier than you, you seemed to realise your frolicking days were up and it was time you tried to set an example for the new brat… so you became the mature, obedient one… you came when we called… you got up quietly and went out when we told you to go outside… and you always welcomed us with a smile and a cold nose touch when you saw us… even until recently when it became so painful for you to get up and walk… you taught me a lot about love and commitment and responsibility… I’m going to feel very sad when I get home and you’re not there to greet me… you always knew, every time I came back on a holiday, you were so glad I was so back… you remembered me so well… you remembered me as the one you loved the most who’d seemingly gone away one day… you remembered me because of your unfailing devotion to me… dear little Chocolate… I hope you have been reunited with all the others from the family… are you with Fudge and Teddy and Biscuit and Snoopy and Dinky and Jeanie and Max and Ginger… I bet Holly led the welcome wagon because she loved you as much as we loved you… there will always be an empty space in Fort Knox because no one can ever replace what you meant to us all… Goodbye dear Chocolate and please continue to take care of us from above…

I keep waiting for it to hit me… when I first heard she was sick a week ago and realised she was going to die soon, I sobbed my heart out. When I found out that she had gone, I shed a tear and that was it… I just felt so sad, like I had the weight of the world on my shoulders… and anything I see on TV about chocolate reminds me of her and makes me sadder but I still can’t cry… when Holly died I cried bucket loads for weeks and I can conjure up the tears for her even now… why can’t I cry for Chocolate? Because my love for her is a much deeper, steadier love… the grief is mingled with relief that her suffering was ended… so now, I just feel a huge emptiness when I think of her… and returning to my home will never be the same without her sweet loyal face at the gate as a welcome… Goodbye dear Chocolate… you will always be my little wild one and one day I’ll come back to you, I promise.

Here are all the pictures I could find of her online... Most of my pictures of her are pre-digital era...

Here she is 3-4 years ago with her good friend Holly... she was still smiling then and she was healthy and strong

Here she is play fighting with Rusty last December in a rare display of energy. Well, the energy was all from Rusty's end really... all she did was growl menacingly at him... and you'll notice Rusty all set to spring... he never got beyond getting set because he took her quite seriously and knew she wouldn't take him jumping her...

There's the growl... watch it, young punk... I've been there, done that...

This was her favourite rug to lie on downstairs in the washbasin area...

She never lost her appetite... This is a piece we call "Dog & The Bone"

She used to feel cold in her old age at nights... I bought her that dog sweater as a joke gift ages ago never thinking she'd actually need to use it :) This was her other favourite spot... on the warm rug outside my parent's bedroom. Of course her most favourite spot was my bed but for the last couple of years, she had all kinds of sores on her body so it wasn't hygienic for her to sleep in the same bed as humans, poor baby.

This is my favourite most recent picture of her... how sweetly she stretches...

Also, one year ago, my Appachen passed away on this day. We still miss you and think of you everyday. Rest in peace, Appachen & Chocolate...

If I leave here tomorrow... Would you still remember me... For I must be travelling on now... Cos there’s too many places I’ve gotta see

2006-08-17T17:28:00.000+10:00

So the weekend before, we had a house leaving party (a lot of people insist on calling it a house cooling party as opposed to a house warming party but I think house cooling sounds horribly uncool)… Anyway, I had a really awesome time and all… in fact, I didn’t stop drinking until 7 in the morning… and a lot of people showed up… and I laughed a lot… and we sang a lot… and my photographer friend took a few hundred photos…

But in the midst of all the madness, whenever I remembered what the party was about, the melancholy took over and it was all I could do not to tear up and start lamenting the loss of this oh-so-warm home of mine… of course, I did end the night in tears but that’s a whole other story and quite irrelevant to this post.

It’s hard to explain my peculiar attachment to this house of mine… it’s just an average two bedroom apartment off the block… it must be about six years old which isn’t too old but quite old for my demanding modernity standards… we leased it in quite a hurry… after all, it was a lot bigger than the old one and the master bedroom actually had an ensuite bathroom which I thought was a luxury I’d involuntarily given up forever the day I left my home in Madras… but on the evening we started moving in two years ago (almost to the day), I noticed a lot of things I hadn’t noticed before… the carpets were moderately stained (and to which, stains have since been generously added by the number of parties we’ve had)… some of the wood was chipping… a few of the lights didn’t work… the guy who’d vacated hadn’t put too much into cleaning it for the new tenants… it was high ceilinged, so that was just begging for cold draughts of air... even the water tasted funny (and it still does… and its impossible to get cold water out of the freaking tap… and I’m addicted to ice cold water… tepid water I can’t even swallow)… and worst of all, it was located in a completely alien suburb and I felt quite sure I’d never enjoy living here…

You see, before this, my entire universe was centred on the Melbourne CBD… my first awful apartment on Swanston Street and my university not even 3 minutes away walking… that apartment was truly dreadful… it was the size of my finger… but the convenience of living next door to city life was incomparable… not that I had any money to enjoy city life… but still, the bright shiny lights were right outside my doorstep…

After six months of living like sardines though we moved just up the street and right to good ol' Lygon Street. Compared to Swanston, the Lygon Street apartment was like a mansion... and it was all sparkly and shiny and brand new and I thought I'd never want to live anywhere ever again... I quickly grew to love the area... it wasn't the poshest or even the nicest of areas... Carlton is notorious for mob activity and theft in general and we've witnessed our share of car chases... not the actual cars, but choppers flying all over the place and us having an illegal smoke on our balcony with the light shining down on us and wondering if our number was finally up... good times :)... paranoid times, but good... our car was broken into twice in our alleged secure basement carpark... but still, it was all quite safe and we walked home late at night from the restaurant/shopping part of Lygon Street many many times... my university was now a 10 minute tram ride away but 10 minutes in the life of a student is negligable... of course, paying for the tickets was a huge unwarranted expense and that's when I started that whole deal with God thing about fare evasion :)

But the most important thing of all was I absolutely loved heading home... walking up to the entrance and through the front door always made me feel welcome... it was clean so we tried our best to keep it clean... there are some aspects to my personality that are rather Monica Geller like in terms of getting mildly obsessive compulsive with cleaning... but in the old place I shocked myself at my complacency with collecting dirty dishes in the sink, not wiping the counters after cooking, never dusting or vaccuming... but all that changed and housemates of mine surely regret how I reverted to my natural ways... I became mildly obsessive compulsive again about the kitchen and my wrath at dirty kitchen counters and undisposed of garbage was not easy to deal with...

You see, this was the first time I felt like I had a home again after leaving my real home... and it was important to me to have the kind of home that made me want to go back to it... what else do you have to look forward to in a strange foreign country if not some place to call your own and make your own... we were always strange that way... other Indian students thought we were nuts when they saw the "fancy" place we lived in... most of them lived in disgusting little holes or an hour away from civilization... because of the rent, of course... as a struggling student, I had a strict stipend per month from home... this strict stipend was suggested by IDP as being more than enough and I know now who they spoke to to come up with this figure... the ones living in the dirty little holes... so here we were, shelling out half our monthly allowance on rent of all things... that left very little leftover for food/expenses/books/entertainment... but I never regretted it once... there was my beautiful apartment, a shining beacon of hope in the midst of all my homesickness and coursework and meagre social life... So until now we were still very focussed on Lygon Street and the CBD and I really had no clue what was outside these boundaries... on rare occassions I went down to Chapel Street or Smith Street or Sydney Road or St. Kilda Road and these were all slightly frightening adventures outside my comfort zone... they were also outside my "hood" so I always bought a tram ticket... and always, I breathed a sigh of relief as soon as I returned to familiar territory.

Then the unthinkable happened... I finished studying and was lucky to get a job almost immediately but this job was all the way down St. Kilda Road, past the CBD, on the other side of the Yarra River (you could almost call it the wrong side of the tracks for me). After almost two years of waking up whenever I felt like it I had to discipline myself to going to bed on time and waking up at 7:30 am so I could leave by 8:15 or so to get to work by 9:15. Yes, it took me the better part of an hour which just shows you what cruel tricks life can play on you… because distance wise, and if I was driving there, it would be all of 20 minutes. But thanks to the wonderfully slow trams that absolutely insist on stopping at every tram stop (which is at every block) and because I had to cross the city on the way and since of course the city is full of thoughtful drivers who are always driving in the tram lane and slowing things down even more, it used to take me that long… And did I mention the sardine theme again every single morning and evening because I was travelling at peak hour? There was simply no relief until I was 3 blocks away from work or home by which point it didn’t matter… I did this for about 2 months before deciding I just couldn’t go on and absolutely had to take the drastic decision of leaving Lygon Street and my beloved hood Carlton and moving to the other side of the city, the names of which suburbs I didn’t even know yet.

By the time we did move, it was something like six months… August 2004… Dandenong Road, Prahran… as I said, at first, I was miserable to move in… but in the first week of arriving at work/home within 12 minutes by tram including waiting time, it was quite easy to forget about Lygon Street (shame on my fickleness) J There were still annoyances such the tepid water and Dandenong Road being the busiest road leading to some few outer suburbs and being busy 24/7 so there was never any respite from traffic noise, but even this worked out in our favour because we could scream our heads off and sing our lungs out and have 20 people simultaneously talking on the balcony and there wouldn’t even be a polite knock from a neighbour asking us to keep it down… we took full advantage of this over two years and hosted a number of loud and rowdy events.

So you see, slowly but surely my universe shifted to this side of the city… I still went to the city for drinks and dinner and what not, on occasion, but I also started visiting more shops/restaurants/bars in my area… since my work was also in the area, we spent many a lunch hour roaming the streets of Chapel and High and Commercial (we shouldn’t leave St Kilda Road out of it too… remember the beautiful bay views)… it’s hard to explain exactly why it is so special… I guess everywhere else is just pretty boring and average… what you see is possibly the same thing you’ll see in other cities around Australia… but Prahran and South Yarra and especially Chapel Street are so eclectic and surprising, you just never know what you’re gonna get… and its my absolute favourite area to drive around looking at all the beautiful houses… at least 30 of my dream houses are located on Orrong Road and Toorak in general… this area is the playground of the very rich and even though I didn’t live in a multimillion dollar house, it still felt pretty good to tell people I lived in Prahran…

And this was the truest test of my love for this side of town… my new job is in the city… yet another cruel life trick… so now I sit (if ever I do get a seat) on the tram for 50 long minutes one way as I travel to work and back… and yes, it bothers me but not once have I ever felt like just escaping… well maybe, some mornings… but every evening, as soon I cross the Yarra, I don’t regret for a minute that my home is still half an hour away… after all, my home is in Prahran… my home is right next door to Chapel Street…
Do I visit Chapel Street every night or weekend? No…
Does that make a difference? No…
Is it enough just knowing its there? Yes…
Just like the beach in Madras, I suppose…
Could we ever get by in a non-coastal city even though we swam in the sea maybe thrice a year? No!

So anyway, our time together is almost up… Sep 1 is when I move… I’m moving to high-rise, non-unique, commercialised personified – Southbank! Why, after all this, am I leaving Prahran you ask? Because it wasn’t affordable in Prahran to buy the kind of place I could see myself living in… Yes, dear reader… I am now a first home owner – a fact that fills me with immense pride and intense dread, all at the same time. And even though Prahran was not really affordable, there were a couple in my old hood Carlton that might’ve worked but I just couldn’t bear the thought of moving to that side of the city again after having lived on this side… this side rocks… that side is seemingly dark and depressing now even though I didn’t know any better then… so anyway, I had to compromise somewhere and Southbank it is… the best thing about Southbank is that work will be a 7 minute tram ride or a 20 minute walk… I see plenty of exercise potential… but anyway, the new place is a whole other story that I’ll save for later.

I think I forced everyone at the party to have a shot of some killer fruit punch (concocted by yours truly) as a tribute to the Dandenong Road house… now the apartment seems to know that I’m moving on and is reacting with uncharacteristic coldness and emptiness… Not to worry… it will always one of the dearest places I’ve lived in… I’m quite sure when its time for me to move on from Southbank I will feel a similar sadness and write about how I regretted leaving Prahran but finally ended up madly in love with Southbank, but that’s just the way I am J I get peculiarly attached to places which after all are just wood and carpet… I think it’s because I am at heart a most intransient being… I get comfortable someplace and never want to leave… I’ve lived in the same house in Madras my whole life and when I had to move out once for six months while renovating I thought my parents were being most unfair to me by kicking me out of my room… as it turned out it worked out well that I lived in Nungambakkam and Adyar for half that time because at least I got to have a very fun summer without having to deal with the annoying logistics issues that are part and parcel of living in Annanagar…

So whatever it is, it’s always hard for me to move on… but eventually I adapt and mostly it works out better than I expected… this is true of any change in my life… so what’s the lesson learned here… nothing… because even though I know I will adapt, it doesn’t stop me from feeling sad at leaving.

So whatever… goodbye Prahran… hello Southbank!

So much for the city Tell me that you'll dance to the end So much for the street lights They're never gonna guide you home

2006-08-01T15:52:00.000+10:00

It’s been a while since I’ve written one of them ‘and this weekend I did blah blah…’ so, here it is. So, this weekend I had a very random girls night on Friday where the most of the other girls proceeded to get very drunk and I tried to get to the same level but it didn’t really happen. I had lots of fun though watching the other girls being very drunk. When I got home I hung out with boys being very drunk and laughed for many hours.

On Saturday we packed up and headed to the big city… haha… the big city is this town called Geelong about an hour away from Melbourne and our friend has been living there for about six months because of his workplace and now he’s returning to civilization at the end of the month so we kinda forced ourselves on his house for one big slumber party. And every time he heads back there on a Sunday night after spending the whole weekend in Melbourne, he says, “See you later… it’s time I was heading back to the big city”… hahaha, it amuses me no end. A billboard on the freeway proclaimed the big city as the most liveable place in Australia and that also amuses me no end…!!

So we engaged in many fun activities whilst there… we played the world’s most moronic board game – Battle of the Sexes, if you please. According to that game, it seems that the only subject women are well-versed in is wine (and a few books) and the only subject men are well-versed in is beer (and a few TV shows)!! Anyhow, we played it and there were also many stupid dares involved such as dancing for ONE WHOLE MINUTE… very daring, I know! But towards the end we reached a stalemate because the stupid dares wouldn’t let us move on and kept moving us backwards so I think people lost interest and stopped playing. But by this time I was toasted and very upset that we ended the game without a winner. Well, that’s not entirely true… I think we all agreed that the women were the smarter/cooler/better sex! Haha… who can refute that with my commenting turned off!

So we also sang many songs very loudly and I’m sure the other inhabitants of the big city will not be too keen to receive us again. And then someone suggested the awesome plan of driving to the beach which is about 20 minutes away. I was most upset that other people’s common sense prevailed about driving drunk! I ended the night on my dear little blue sleeping bag that has seen much better days. What fun tales my sleeping bag also could tell… But it is kind to me no longer… I had a very sore hip the next morning, although, to be fair, I bruise like a peach.

We ended up our trip to the big city at where else but a classic icon of suburbia – MacDonald’s (with three other fast food places in the same lot). I walked in playing the part of trailer trash to perfection in my sweats, sweatshirt (which is some 100 years old and belonged to my DAD), and heeled footwear (from the night before)… haha!

All in all, it was a very fun trip to the big city and though I will quite possibly never return, I will forever keep with me the fond memories of my one night in the big city.

It’s been a bad day. Please don’t take a picture. It’s been a bad day. Please.

2006-07-27T11:48:00.000+10:00

I hate starting out my day in a black mood but sometimes it just can’t be helped. There is no real reason even. Just vague irritations creeping up on me from all corners. Maybe it is the mild hangover I am nursing. No, that’s not it. I never get hangovers. What does bother me is less than 8.5 hours of sleep because then my contact lenses are torture. So right now my eyes feel like poached eggs. I don’t really know how I know what poached eggs must feel like but surely this is it.

I was in a much better mood last morning. That was mainly because I received notice that U2 has FINALLY rescheduled for November. First Paul McCartney cancelled on me all those years ago and then U2 postponed on me earlier this year… it was quite a pleasant surprise indeed to find out they are coming back as promised. But I’m soooo not getting my hopes up again. Oh, and Billy Joel is also coming to Australia in November. But I think I plan to be in India then… it can’t be helped Billy ol’ chap… you’ll have to sing me a song another time. Speaking of Billy Joel, I heard Uptown Girl the other day after so long and I fell in love with it all over again.

Mmmmm… my morning toast and jam has helped ever so slightly. Although, it is some 0 point WeightWatchers fruit spread and it doesn’t taste all that wonderful. I don’t know why I even bother really… I know I don’t care enough about my weight and health. I still eat unhealthily and I quit gymming a few months ago. The 24 inch waist was a lost cause the minute I started drinking copious amounts of coke with alcohol. So now, as long as I don’t go beyond a 27 inch waist, I don’t give a crap. But I am trying to get back to breakfast everyday because we all know it is the most important meal of the day. I think you’re supposed to eat as soon as you wake up though – not 2 hours later. Well, it cannot be helped… my morning routine leaves no room for such luxuries. I have a real problem with waking up. Quite often I have a problem with falling asleep. But my real problem is waking up. I know that no one likes waking up early but you would have to get inside my head to understand just how intensely I dread it… and there’s no escaping the fact that I have to do it every freaking morning. Saturday is my only relief. Sunday I can’t take the chance of sleeping in because then falling asleep on Sunday night becomes an issue and Monday morning is that much worse. Yawn…

So anyway, I’m really enjoying my new food stash setup. Every couple of weeks I go to the supermarket at lunch and stock up on fruits, nuts, and chocolate, and breakfast items. Breakfast items include cereal, bread, and Marie biscuit type biscuits. I messed up on the cereal though – I bought some healthy looking Kellogg’s Special K thing with real fruits and it tastes horrible. I should’ve just followed my instincts and gone with Cocoa Pops… sigh… See, this comes back to the whole health thing. I don’t have it in me to eat stuff I don’t like just because it’s “healthy” so why am I even trying when it’s just going to sit in my desk drawer until next Christmas!? But my absolute favourite breakfast item is dunking my Marie biscuit type biscuits in hot coffee and having them melt in my mouth. I still can’t “drink” hot coffee, but I imbibe it through the biscuits and it is to die for! I hope I don’t get addicted to coffee though… there’s no room at the inn for more dependencies!

I haven’t eaten breakfast in four years. At home I sorta used to, especially when I was in school and college. Here, as a student I never woke up for breakfast, and as an employed individual, the snoozing has always been more important than the eating. Also I’m not into the whole Indian breakfast thing. I’m not a fan of idli vada dosai sambar… I know… and I call myself a South Indian! Indian food at lunch and dinner any day but the English and the “Continent” really have the breakfast thing down pat. Pancakes, sausages, eggs, bacon, hash browns, toast, muffins, bagels, waffles, fresh fruit, fresh fruit juice… need I go on?! So my favourite breakfast/brunch activity is going to this place called Amici on Chapel Street… Amici means friend in Italian… just a little non-handy trivia… and they make the most unbelievable hollandaise sauce and the yummiest milkshakes. So that is a fortnightly routine… eggs Benedict on crispy bacon and freshly made toasted sourdough bread covered with a generous serving of hollandaise sauce and 1 chocolate thickshake, thanks! It’s all about the poached eggs today, huh? But seriously, handy travel tip… if ever this side, Amici on Chapel Street is a must-stop (and I’ve tried the same meals at other places and its never up to par)… and on a Saturday or Sunday around noon, look out for a rowdy bunch of people who quieten down considerably as soon as the food is served :)

Well I think I have bludged enough for one morning. Ha, the US dictionary does not recognise bludge but trust the Australian one to… and here I always thought it was slang. It means faffing, wasting time, etc. Ha, neither of them recognises faffing. I think I need to stop playing with the dictionaries and get back to work now. Goodbye!

Can I get a Woop Woop Can I get a Woop Woop? Single ladies, I can’t hear ya’ll!!

2006-07-18T17:24:00.000+10:00

I cannot get the freaking song out of my head. It’s my own freaking fault of course.

Do you sometimes remember things you’ve said or done and want to die laughing?

So thanks to Saturday night, I will never listen to this song again without blushing prettily and smiling embarrassedly… except when next I’m drunk of course… cos that next time with the right crowd and the right mood, this is an encore just waiting to happen! It’s a dangerous trend though… no one can shut me up with singing, but now is it also impossible to stop me dancing?

Its true that I think of her all the time… she still puts in an appearance in dreams of green lawns and white picket fences… and I still get teary-eyed talking about her… but I still want to tell her story to anyone who will listen… Holly in the Sky with Diamonds… the dog with kaleidoscope eyes :)

I used to think of myself as the girl with kaleidoscope eyes… but what does it even mean? Colours and shapes in a different pattern every time I open my eyes? Never see the same thing twice… makes for an interesting life… or not… I don’t know… I can’t express my thoughts clearly sometimes… And sometimes I get bored with trying to express my thoughts… like now… so let’s just drop it!

There was this song that came out last year or maybe the year before. It was the old Linkin Park Numb with Jay-Z’s Encore and I was pre-biased against it because this was a particularly strong anti-R&B phase of mine. I say R&B because I have nothing against hip-hop and even enjoy it sometimes. But these excuses from such “R&B” artists as Nelly and Akon and even Snoop fucking Dogg (I just don’t get Drop It Like It’s Hot) make me physically ill almost. I’m sure The Beatles make a lot of people feel the same way so to each his own and all that! But anyway, this song did grow on me and finally came that drunken night where I insisted on playing it every 5 minutes and memorising as much of it as I could… the Jay-Z parts were hard. I think Jay-Z is a cool rapper.

So what was my point? There wasn’t one… I just felt like talking about the song. And I guess it would be funny if anyone ever saw the three of us singing it. I even looked for it at karaoke that last time… of course it wasn’t there. When we go our separate ways (which is coming up quite soon, really), we have to do a night of just the three of us at home, singing Numb between cigarette breaks on the balcony.

So who is responsible for those karaoke lists? I understand popular singable songs and all but how does that excuse only five Beatles songs on the list? I didn’t even check for Pink Floyd… actually when I’m 100 drinks down like I was that karaoke night, I’ll sing anything. And I did. They sang Madonna’s Like A Prayer and they sang Michael Jackson’s The Way You Make Me Feel and of course, I sang (whilst cringing)… my sing-every-single-time-I-have-a-mic-in-front-of-me song is I Will Survive and so of course I sang that… but the best was in the final 10 minutes of having the room with everyone fighting over songs and the mic, someone reminded me about Bohemian Rhapsody and I just kicked everyone out of the way to sing it. I might have to revise my sing-every-single-time-I-have-a-mic-in-front-of-me song to it… but then again, I don’t think so. I’ll make it my sing-every-second-time-I-have-a-mic-in-front-of-me song!

Sometimes I write for the sake of writing. Do you ever go back to something you wrote a year ago and cringe? I do it all the freaking time. Why is it that something that seemed so profound and/or entertaining then seems so pompous and/or juvenile now? I don’t know…

I love this latest trend of remixing old disco/80’s songs… they sound awesome… and they bring together the tastes of so many more people. They did a brilliant job with Owner of a Lonely Heart (and the video simply rocked, it was so cute) last year and my current favourite is Thunder in my Heart! And then there’s the whole clubby reggae business which also rocks… how brilliant was Love Generation and his new song isn’t too bad either!

Wow, can this really be true? Can I actually enjoy the music of today? I don’t think this has happened since my boy band phase in high school (and let’s not pretend we didn’t all have one)!! And it’s strange how those clubbing songs from the late nineties and early noughties (that is what they are calling this decade FYI) didn’t affect me then the way they do now. Then they were like background music in a way… a backdrop to much more interesting events such as wild beach house parties and meeting old and new people at discos. Now I actually listen to these songs just for the fun of it… and a couple of years ago a whole bunch of them were compiled into CDs called Wild Gold… the irony that those songs are considered “classic” club music never fails to amuse me. I love them though… one of the advantages of having house parties in Australia… we never get as fancy as having DJs so we get to pick and play… and we play Wild Gold a LOT!! And now I will be adding Fat Man Scoop to the playlist… haha!

It’s nice that I’m listening to music again… I go through phases where I just don’t… I didn’t touch my iPod for about five months this year. But now its back… and it certainly helps me write…

Here’s hoping the music never lets me go!

What is this I think I feel... I wanna feel the sunshine all the time...

2006-06-29T12:40:00.000+10:00

I wanna feel the sunshine lift my head
I wanna see your face when I wake up
I wanna be the light that’s in your life
I wanna feel the sunshine all the time

Today I remember Goa… the music brought it back… party shuffle all the way… this time it was the Ministry of Sound Annual 2006… the only CD we had… not even both discs… just disc 1… well, there was another CD… a mish mash of all the songs I hurriedly downloaded when I got to India and realised I had no music at all for the car… so there was also Dakota and Scissor Sisters… driving back drunk late at night in our dodgy Tempo Traveller that seats 12 but should only be allowed to take 6… and there was Kat playing the Pussycat Dolls to perfection… Dontcha think your girlfriend is hot like me… Kat is a guy…

But the thing with Ministry of Sound is you gotta listen to it over and over and sometimes its hard to tell one song from another until you’ve listened to it enough times to pick out your favourite parts and then you actually pick up song titles and track numbers so you can rewind and fast forward at will…

So we listen as we drive 16 hours from Bangalore to Goa… we listen to other stuff other people have too but nothing else registers… tracks 5, 9 and 13… we wind our way through the Western Ghats… sometimes at breakneck speeds… the hazy layer of smoke in the air… the gentle buzz from the ready mix in my head… there is no fear… the music lulls us to sleep and wakefulness again… we stop for chai and chocolate fixes…

There’s nothing quite like the start of a trip… anything can happen… funny things funny people say and do are happening already but you know the best is yet to come…

Here we are in crowded Calangute all of a sudden… along the way we pass Angel Resorts where we stayed 2001-2002… what a time… what a trip…

Goa is the same but everything else is different… maybe it’s everyone else who is different… maybe I’m suddenly too old and tired to drink as much… I definitely know I’m too tired and sick to smoke so much… the sore throat I’ve been avoiding for a few days by diligently gargling with salt water is finally catching up with me… so passes the first night in Goa… desultorily drinking at Tito’s…

The bright sunshine the next morning makes the world look beautiful again… and that first glimpse of the bright blue Arabian Sea makes it all worth it… we claim a shack as our own and spend the next six hours sunbathing and swimming… we keep up a steady stream of orders for drinks and food… and then the long awaited sunset… this is the Goa I know and love… the beach, the shack, and the sun setting…

That night we drink up and head out… we try one place after another but nothing feels right… and whoever heard of such exorbitant cover charges in Goa before… and where have all the raves gone… I’m not the world’s most enthusiastic raver but once every couple of years is alright… but no dice… everything’s busted… are we in Goa or Madras?

Today is the last day of the year… the sun is shining again and we luck out with a shack that has deck chairs that we lie on all day… before I know it, the sun is setting for the last time this year… so many memories flash before my eyes… the years that have been… tomorrow, a new year… a new beginning?

Is it 11:30 pm already? I am happy… I am with the one I love and surrounded by near and dear friends… the music at Nine Bar is loud but not intrusive… I am quietly high on life and Bacardi (with a little bit of Old Monk thrown in to make it interesting)… the organisers ask us to move away from the wall as they set up the fireworks… someone gives me a little taste of their ecstasy pill… my blocked nose clears up for a glorious 10 seconds… people hugging kissing laughing… Happy New Year… so, now what?

By 3 am, I have reached my peak… I have danced and drunk and smoked… I am in a curiously violent mood and ready to punch anyone who invades my space… the curious part is I am most disappointed I don’t actually get to practice my Kung Fu Kick… by now we have walked a lot and moved between a couple of places… word on the street is the Hilltop is where its going to go off as the sun rises… in my alcohol fuelled enthusiasm, I am all set to last until then… alas, by 5 am I’m back in my bed and pass out in seconds…

I wake up in the afternoon of the new year and my head feels like I got punched the night before but the unbearable pain in my throat clues me in on what is really going on… we head to the beach one last time but for me there is no swimming, no drinking, no smoking… all I can do is sit in my chair and gaze out at the wide expanse of sea in front of me… the air is still warm and the sun is still shining but today I am shivering… I remember the last time… I wanna feel the sunshine all the time…

There are many things I’ve forgotten over the years but there are some moments that stand out and that I will never let go of… like that moment on New Years Day 2002… it was nearing sunset… there we all were sitting around on the beach… maybe it was the same beach I am sitting on now 4 years later… coming down from our first (and last... for me, at least) ecstasy hits of the night before… a swim in the warm water… someone finds a little starfish on the sand… stomachs pleasantly full… two Bacardi and watermelons down… at that moment, I felt more content than I’d ever felt before or have felt since… anything was possible… we were young, healthy and the world was our oyster… I knew everything in the new year was going to be terribly different… I didn’t know yet if it would be good different or bad different… but I knew that whenever I just needed to feel good I could go back to that moment and feel that same warm feeling of contentment wash over me again…

So I look around now… most of the faces are different… one or two from the first time… the missing ones are overseas or otherwise occupied… and half of these new ones are fresh faced 20 year olds… the same age I was the last time… they are now coming down from their best ever high and are already planning their next visit to Goa… same time, same place… I smile in amusement at this rite of passage… maybe they will come back and maybe they won’t… and if they do come back maybe they will find what I have found… a place may never change but how it makes you feel can change because of the way you have changed…

I’m so tired… all I want is to sleep… I close my eyes and go back to that moment all over again… it still works… it still makes me feel so good inside… I realise that I am still young in a relative sense but of course that doesn’t stop me from feeling old… hopefully I am still healthy… but is the world still my oyster… is anything still possible… anyone with a gung ho live-life-to-the-fullest attitude will say of course it is… I’m not so sure… I know now that there are some things that are just not going to be possible… there are some dreams that I just have neither the time nor the inclination to follow through with… but that’s the real difference between then and now… then it might’ve seemed a horrible betrayal of myself to give up on anything… now, I accept what is and what can be and am learning to let go of what will never be… and now there are new dreams… and so that’s the same between then and now… I still dream…

There isn’t much else to tell… we leave later that night… I sleep all the way back to Bangalore… it’s a dreamless self-medication-induced stupor… I wake up to stifling heat, crowded roads and polluted air… it’s a brand new day and a brand new year… whatever will be will be…

Maybe the last two weeks of my vacation will be fun fun fun with wedding madness, Mexican themed bachelorette nights, Wild Wild West parties and six year anniversary celebrations… maybe I will return to Melbourne and walk about in a daze of homesickness and job dissatisfaction for weeks… maybe these things will pass… maybe I’ll get a better job… maybe I won’t write a word for 6 months… maybe I’ll chop my hair to half its length after 3 years… maybe before I know it, I’ll reach the halfway mark of the new year… maybe winter will go by quickly with the aid of layers and heaters… maybe there will be planned trips overseas… maybe visitors from overseas will plan to visit me?

What is this I think I feel… why do I love the sunshine… because its not always shining… that’s when we go to the secret places in our hearts where it is shining… and when it is shining, well, that’s as good as it’s ever gonna get…

I like to party... Everybody does...

2005-12-28T05:36:00.000+11:00

I can't believe Christmas has come and gone... with everything else that was going on, I had absolutely no time to do Christmassy things like sing carols and since I finished all my bloody shopping in Australia, there was no real urgency except of course to wrap all my presents at the last bloody minute as usual. Anyway, I got to sing carols in church and went home and had cake and wine and then went off party hopping at some 3 in the morning to go wish all my friends who were partying the night away!! There was also annual drinks and dinner bash at my house on Christmas night and much wine was drunk by all and much fun was had by all...

I can't believe Madras... It's like I never left. Last year when I visited, I knew no one whenever I went out except for the people I was with... This year, I'm amazed at all the old faces I'm seeing again... the same old faces who used to be at every party and every disco on every Friday and Saturday night when I lived and partied in Madras. Friday night was a very random getting wasted night where I met like some 100 people I hadn't met in years in the one crowded pub and the next day I was still remembering more and more people I'd met or seen... Madras is quite uncanny!

I can't believe I've been functioning on less than 10 hours of sleep every night in spite of being out until all hours every night. Tonight has been the first night I forced myself to stay home so I could recuperate slightly before leaving to Goa tomorrow. Last night was a very wild bachelorette party for a friend and it was a full on 70s theme and her sister and Rat's sister just did a very brilliant job with the decorations... Just like the brilliant job Rat's sister did for Sista T's baby shower... Good job good job ;) And please don't miss my cool pink 70s sunnies on the bar table...

I can't believe how much fun I'm having... I really don't want it to end...

Hey, who's this handsome motherfucker... I just love him to death!

And here's my dear little Chocolate... so old and tired and slow... I really fear she's going to drop dead any second...

So hope you all had a Merry Christmas and I'll see you all in 2006... I could reflect on the year that's been and what not, but fuck that... Happy New Year!!

I'm so love in love with you...whatever you want to do is alright with me...Coz you make me feel so brand new...And I want to spend my life with you

2005-12-22T00:16:00.000+11:00

So after all that anticipation, I’m finally here and haven’t had even a single moment to really take it all in with everything going in. It’s been brilliant so far. We started partying as soon as we got off the plane and I think I must’ve slept for about 15 hours in total from the night before I left until Sunday night. Of course now I am making up for many months of insufficient slumber and it’s incredibly peaceful.

What have I done in five days and six nights apart from drink and smoke… I’ve hung out with all my favourite girls and boys and I’ve just laughed and laughed. Some things will never change… (and thank god for those people). I’ve bonded with parents and sister and dog Chocolate met the new dog in my family Rusty… he is sooooo handsome… and such a sweetie… when we first met, he went a bit psycho, but now he’s used to me and is such a darling…

Madras is the same and so different at the same time. So many new places and buildings but instinctively I still know my way around and if I were to close my eyes on a drive and open them five minutes later, I’d still know where I was… She has taken me back so willingly in spite of me ditching her all these years…

Driving here again has been a real trip as always… the way even the slowest autorickshaw will refuse to move out of the right lane and you have no choice but to overtake rather recklessly from the left… Love it… And the noise and the traffic and the potholes and the smells… it’s just all so very real… so very home…

The rain of course has been crazy. I love it and all but it was promising to be a real dampener on the trip. Now I understand all those depressive Bay of Bengal statements… she’s been good today though so there’s hope yet.

And the absolute best part is that S is here with me and its been three years since we’ve been back together… back to where we started and where we had the absolute best time of our lives… Since we've been together, loving you forever is what I need... let me, be the one you come running to... I'll never be untrue

Anyhoo, don’t know when and where I’ll have the time to blog again. But the thing is I want to write as much as I can so I can read it three months from now and remember how awesome it was. So we’ll see…

Cheers to Rat, Sista T, Lavi, Snoop and all my other non-blogger buddies like N, S and all the boys… please continue to entertain me in the same fashion for the next four weeks… Woohoo!

Life I love you… all is groovy…

But I Still (haven't) Found What I Was Looking For…

2005-12-08T16:16:00.000+11:00

If you're reading this, then Rat has very kindly put up the post for me. I'm trying not to publish anything to the web at the moment from work and so that's why I haven't been commenting either, but I have been doing my regular reading rounds. Anyway, this is only for another week and then I go home so I can pick up from where I left off.

Right, so the biggest news on my horizon is that I managed to buy tickets to watch U2 live in March after continuously clicking my mouse button for an hour. It was an incredibly nail biting experience… finally I managed it and of course it was sold out soon after, but I think they're doing an additional show now. Anyway, I'm really quite excited because there are such few people I really would like to watch live in concert and U2 is one such band. Now just four months of waiting to go…

Everything is just flashing by damn fast and I don't have even a single moment to just sit back and relax until I get to Madras and even then its going to be Party Central. Friday night was my work Christmas party and it was crazy fun. Every single one of us got unbelievably wasted and kept getting told off for smoking indoors or taking our glasses outside when smoking outdoors. We had a small after-party at our house and I think I managed to sleep about five hours that night before I was rudely woken up on Saturday morning by friends trying to pick up their cars from my basement.

I spent the entire weekend shopping. My room is like a disaster zone with the number of bags lying around. I have NO CLUE how I'm going to fit everything very neatly into one little suitcase that should only weigh 20 kilos. And speaking of gifts, its just getting harder and harder each year. I've bought my parents some real nonsense because I've totally run out of ideas. I'm hoping to finish my shopping inMadras only.

Oh, and apparently Goa for New Years is definitely on so this holiday is really set. Time in Madras and a mad trip to Goa.

Yuletide Tales Episode 2

I read something on JR's blog about how she didn't know that Christmas trees in India were all fake!! Well yes, they were (mostly) and feeling similarly excited at the thought of being able to buy a real tree, two Christmases ago, I decided to get a real tree. First off, it was a real bitch fitting it into the car and I'm not really sure how we managed to carry it up from the basement to the apartment. All I know is, there was a nice trail of pine needles the whole way and we cleaned it all up out of consideration for everyone else in the building. I don't know why we bothered… a few days later someone else brought a real tree home and didn't bother cleaning up.

But anyway, the tree refused to stand up straight. It had a very stubborn list no matter what we tried. Once the decorations were up, they kept slipping off… every day I'd have to rearrange the ones that had fallen off and vacuum the area around the tree because of the constant pine needle debris. But still, we put our many gifts under the tree and went to Midnight Mass (this time I was dead sober) and opened all our presents and had a small party beside the tree on Christmas Day.

Christmas passed and New Years passed. We considered how to get rid of the tree. We couldn't just dump it out front with the garbage cans, we had to go dump it at a garbage tip. We searched and searched online and couldn't find a single tip anywhere even on the Melbourne Council websites – we were quite obviously looking for the wrong thing! Finally one day in early February we decided we absolutely had to get rid of it and planned a dump and run strategy. First we stripped the tree of all its branches and put them into many shopping bags and then S tried cutting the trunk into smaller pieces with our kitchen knife. The knife actually broke or got chipped and poor S got hurt quite badly by a stray branch… he still has the scar. Somehow we managed it and packed it into the car and set off to dump the tree.

The first instalment of bags we dumped near our DVD library because we went there to return DVDs. After we did it though though, we noticed a surveillance camera exactly over thestuff we'd just dumped. Ah well, we didn't get into trouble. The second instalment we dumped near the garbage cans of some apartment building near ours. And the final instalment, wewent to a shopping centre that day and the car park was nearly empty when we left, so we dumped the remaining bags in a shopping trolley and dashed off.

We tried to do the right thing but well, the tip was almost impossible to find. I still don't know where it is. So last year, we went to Kmart and bought a very beautiful faketree that stood straight and didn't leave behind a trail of pine needles and held onto the decorations firmly and very nicely fit into a small box at the end of the season withminimal manual labour. I'm all for real over fake but when it comes to Christmas trees, its definitely more trouble than its worth. And that's all I have to say about that!

Christmas is coming… all the bells are ringing…

2005-12-02T13:44:00.000+11:00

Starting December 16, 2005...

...I will sleep for at least ten hours every night
...I will not to do a single household chore
...I will feast on chicken and fish and cutlets and prawns and the best part is, none of it will have to be made by me
...I will enjoy the luxury of actually wearing ironed clothes for a change (I stopped ironing about six months ago… its amazing how you can get by without it)
...I will have dogs in my life again however briefly
...I will get high everyday and get drunk every other day
...I will bring Christmas cheer to all and sundry by singing Christmas carols incessantly (oh boy, are my friends in trouble when I’m drunk)
...I will soak in the heat of my beloved Madras and not worry about how many layers to wear everyday
...I will rest, laze, play, read, blog, catch up with my near and dear ones, exercise a little (maybe), party, talk, dance, laugh, sing…

It’s going to be so good. I’m always worried that a holiday will never turn out as anticipated but this time I just feel its going to be perfect. And its almost like my holiday has started already starting from last Wednesday night… my housemate’s sister is visiting from India and we’ve been smoking like mad and drinking almost every day. This week we did Tuesday night (what a raging wine hangover I had the next morning) and last night and tonight is my work Christmas party so more drinking. And the pace isn’t going to slow down until I leave. If I didn’t have so much to occupy my time, I’d probably be sitting at home and staring at my calendar counting down the days.

Speaking of counting down the days, 24 days till Christmas… I can hardly wait. You saw how excited I was about my birthday… Christmas is that ten times over… the excitement, the anticipation, the homemade wine, the food, the presents, the Christmas tree, the parties, the family, the friends, the shopping, the gift wrapping, the carols, the red and green, the candles, the Mass, the Secret Santas, the red nosed reindeer, the stockings, the holly, the baby Jesus…

So I’m going to start writing a little collection of Christmas memories from now until Christmas in every post. I figure I’ll start with last year since it was most recent…

Yuletide Tales Episode 1

Last Christmas was really quite rocking. It was my second Christmas away from home and depression was bound to set in at some point so I made an effort to party extra hard and not feel too sad. The lead up to Christmas was filled with Christmas parties, boat cruises, lots and lots of Bacardi Limon, lots and lots of carol singing, shopping, Christmas tree decorating, etc. etc. Here’s a picture of my Christmas tree from last year… since we only have each other to buy presents for, we go all out and its not even S and T’s festival but I kinda force them to celebrate it with me… they’re very sweetly adjusting that way… and anyway, who’s not up for presents and parties…

So Christmas Eve dawned bright and clear and we chilled out that day at work and blared carols and Pink Floyd (what a combination) from our speakers and had a couple of drinks when work let off about 2pm. Then I went home and there was a full bottle of Limon to finish and we did just that. By about 6pm I was wasted but it was a very good wasted… People dropped in bearing gifts and drank and smoked with us. In the midst of all this, some random person called me and poor fellow got abused because I thought someone was playing the fool and then I called my Mom a few times… why why do I keep doing this, I don’t know… and all I did was laugh and tell her she sounded different… she thought I was mad… I was just smashed. At about 10pm, I started watching Carols by Candlelight on TV and of course the tears almost came out in my drunkenness and I absolutely insisted we go to church for Midnight Mass because I’ve always gone every year. So I dragged S and my friend from work and three extremely smashed people sat through the whole thing and I even sang along to all the carols very joyfully… I like to think that it wasn’t too sinful what I did… I did sober down during the Mass…

After church we went home and continued drinking and ripped open all our presents… it was such madness and so much fun… I got some cool presents like a mobile phone and an LP player and lots of other random stuff. I don’t even remember when we finally went to bed… but we woke up again on Christmas Day after only a few hours sleep because my friend had invited us to her house for lunch… so we drunkenly drove to her farm about 2 hours away and had a very pleasant time on the farm.

She had cooked up a storm so we ate nicely… she got me a tequila roulette thingie as a present so we all had a few shots of tequila in spite of the hangover and then headed back home. There were phone calls from family the whole day which is always a highlight and when my Mom spoke to me she asked me if she still sounded different… I said No, but I sure sounded different from the night before. We ended the night watching Shrek 2 again which was one of my Christmas presents… god, how I love Donkey and Puss in Boots.

It was a very lovely Christmas in 2004 and I can’t wait to see what happens this year…

That's just the way it is... Things'll never be the same

2005-11-28T14:19:00.000+11:00

Isn’t it just the irony of life that when I had no wish to stop blogging, when I had so many exciting things coming up like Christmas, trip home, weddings, babies, bachelorette parties, etc. to blog about circumstances forced me to take a break…

Update: Everyone scared me slightly about how much detail I put up so I have taken down most of the bitching. Here is a gist for anyone who missed out ;)

My boss was fired. Him getting fired set off a crazy chain of events… No one did any work for two weeks… everyone just stared blankly at their monitors, most people took 2 hour lunches everyday and at least thrice a week there was alcohol involved at these sessions, people fucked off whenever they felt like it and took it in turns to call in sick, people picked up fights with people they believed had been involved in getting him fired, people threatened to quit, people did quit, and of course every Friday night was a major regroup and re-strategise campaign at the pub …

I had a little work drama of my own in all this… but now that has been sorted too and the person I was really pissed off at got exactly what he deserved!

So now we’re trying to pick up the pieces and move on from everything that happened in the last three weeks. People will be missed, like my ex-boss and a couple of other friends who also left… I think that we all had a really good time in the last two years and now the party is really over! Well, nothing lasts forever…

Also on that note, my friend from Madras who came to Australia the same time I did and who shared my first apartment with me and S and who washed and ironed his own clothes and cooked his own meals for the first time ever at the same time as me, is returning to Madras for good in a couple of days. I will miss him… his turn of phrase is really quite like no one else’s… we could publish a book on all the funny things he has said in the crudest manner possible… The three of us lived together for 1.5 years and it seems like such a hazy dream now… None of us had lived away from home before, we were all spoiled rotten with never having done chores before, we missed our friends (and family) terribly and tried to recreate our alcoholic party Madras lifestyle in Melbourne and realised it wasn’t quite the same…

But we had our fun and games and wild nights on the town and quiet, reflective nights in. We also had our share of fighting and hating each other, there were car troubles and university troubles and financial difficulties and struggling to make ends meet. Everything was so new and strange… like smoking in our apartment, whenever we wanted, wherever we wanted (I’m so glad we stopped that dirty habit)… That whole first experience of living away from home is really quite something and its impossible not to form this incredible bond with the people you shared it with. And its also impossible not to pick up some embarrassing stories about each other along the way… I’ll hold my tongue though, don’t want embarrassing stories about me to get out!! So anyway, we hung out this weekend one last time in Australia and it was good. The cool thing is he’ll be there in Madras when we visit and he’ll be as jobless as us so we have someone to hang out with during the day like we used to…

I’ll come around and visit everyone real soon, ok? Must get back to work now!

How much is that doggie in the window? I do hope that doggie’s for sale…

2005-11-09T13:46:00.000+11:00

Yay… I have been tagged at just the right time when I wasn’t sure what I felt like writing about. So here goes…

Seven Things I Plan To Do:

Skydive
Learn how to play guitar
Get fit
Tour Europe
Get a dog
Buy a convertible
Design my own house

Seven Things I Can Do:

Sing sing sing
Survive quite happily on a diet of rice and curds and fried fish/chicken/mince/prawns/potato
Sleep for 12 hours at a stretch
Drink like a fish
Shine academically
Smoke like a hippie
Make people laugh

Seven Things I Can't Do:

Eat anything that has long slices of onion in it (or even any other kind of vegetable)
Get out of bed without snoozing
Drink gin
Play particularly well at any sport
Spend another Christmas without my family
Spend my life without a furry four-legged companion of the canine variety
Stop eating chocolate

Seven Things I Say Most Often:

Fuckin’ hell
Chooth (Hindi)
Ey Watha (Tamil! I have no idea how the second word is spelt)
As if
Whatever
Yeah right
That only

I’m not tagging anyone but everyone is free to do it if they want… it’s a lot harder than it seems!

So then I analysed my things I plan to do list to see if I was close to any of them and I believe I am to some of them.

Skydive – just waiting for the right time or a trip to New Zealand

Learn how to play guitar – I can play notes E and F now. A friend gave me his old guitar which was very kind of him and he would’ve taught me more if everyone else present didn’t prefer him playing the guitar to me learning it. But I shall persevere…

Get fit – Been at the gym for almost two months now. Rather scared to check my weight and measure my waist because what if there hasn’t been any improvement?! Still I do feel slightly better so here’s hoping…

Tour Europe – Ideally, this will happen next year or the year after. But its just so expensive and I can see my entire life savings being blown away on the one trip to Europe. But I think it will be worth it… and its time I stopped spending every holiday of mine in India.

Get a dog – This one kills me the most. Right now I don’t have the house and backyard but more than that I keep wondering what the poor thing will do when I’m out of the house 50 hours a week! The dogs in Madras always had someone for company and when we returned from a holiday they’d let us know exactly how lonely they’d been by barking up a frenzy. Hey… that’s what my next post is going to be about… the story of all my darling dogs (and there were a few)

Buy a convertible – I really want to do this next year but there are many obstacles along the way like getting an Australian drivers licence (I’m quite certain I will fail the test – everyone does at least once) and of course, the big one – money! I could just buy any old car for less money but I think that since I don’t really need a car, it’d be fun to buy a cool car now at the age when I can do cool stuff and not want these things later in life when I am bogged down by shopping bags and car seats!

Design my own house – This seems the furthest away. In fact, I don’t think it’ll happen in this country in this lifetime (I’ll be lucky to even afford an average house off the block) unless I win the lottery… but since I don’t even play… I guess I can hope that I get a super high-paying job in India that will allow me to fulfil this plan…

So there you have it! Let's hope I make them all happen...

Living life the easy way... And sippin’ on Bacardi Rum

2005-11-03T15:09:00.000+11:00

Oh joy… summer is almost here. We’re on Daylight Savings Time and that always puts me in a holiday mood since the sun doesn’t set until 9 pm or thereabouts and as a result I always feel like I have some few more hours in a day and take things much easier. We have also had two gloriously hot 30 degree plus days this week and it was simply blissful… especially since the first one was Tuesday and a holiday for the Melbourne Cup of all things (public holiday so we can all sit back and watch the horse races is something else, but I’m not complaining… its our first public holiday since JUNE), and the second one was yesterday and I just couldn’t wake up in the morning so took a sickie… Have I ever mentioned that I love to sleep and once I’m asleep I really really hate waking up but falling asleep is a big big problem for me these days… Ah well, we can talk about my insomnia another time. Lets get back to talking about alcohol instead…

So with spirits we also have the whiskeys and the bourbons and it seems that as people get older they’re drinking more of these but this is one kind of spirit I just can’t stand… not that I haven’t drunk this also when really desperate but its not something I particularly enjoy. I remember that when I first came to Australia I drank a lot of Jim Beam because S and my housemate at the time preferred it and we were poor students so we couldn’t always choose what we drank so I just went along with it and drank it and the thing about it is that it doesn’t really get me happy high… it just gets me into that mode where I know I’ve drunk a lot but can’t really feel the fun effects of it… like when you smoke too much and reach a kind of zone… So anyway, one night in particular stands out when we the three of us drank Jim Beam the whole night and then S passed out and my housemate and I continued and suddenly it was 7:00 in the morning so I thought, “oh, what the hell, let me just go for my 9:00 am class now instead of missing it’. So I went… hahaha… what fun it all was. And it wasn’t my fault my stupid course had a class EVERY Saturday… did they not take into account that people like to get smashed on a Friday night!! But yeah, the whiskeys and the bourbons are so not my thing…

So is Tequila my thing? I think not… although I have always had shitloads of fun every time I went the Tequila route. But its not something I would be up for every weekend… its more a once every four months experience. At the last one, three of us slammed almost two bottles over a few hours and I yelled at everyone at the party and told them they better come to my birthday party the following weekend and on the way home I used up all my credit calling Rat and Sista T and apparently all I kept saying was “Yeah maaan, I’m coming next month maaan… yeah maan” and then just kept laughing hysterically of course. Good times good times… :)

So before we get to the grand finale of my favourite type of alcohol ever (and which you should’ve guessed by now if you know me even a little or if you have been following the alcohol posts closely ;)) lets talk about sweet tasting and some not so sweet tasting liquors and such. I’ve always been a Baileys on the rocks fan for just a quiet dinner and night in type thing and I’m very attached to Kahlua for sentimental you me and you reasons. So guess what… it is also possible to get extremely fucking high on this deadly combo particularly if you are slamming them both together… So one sunny AFTERNOON, four people slammed a bottle of Baileys and Kahlua and guess what me and my friend slammed next… we finished a whole disgusting bottle of Sambucha… oh my god, that stuff tastes GROSS… but we slammed it… and I was very very high, I kid you not. We also went clubbing that night after all this and I had a good time dancing for a while and then went stumbling to find a bathroom and instead I went into some employee area and literally stumbled down a few steps and twisted my ankle and just lay there in a heap for some unknown period of time. I really have no clue how anyone found me or helped me out of there… the next thing I know I’m in the lounge next to the ladies bathroom and there’s an ice pack around my ankle and all the ladies who came in kept asking me if I was alright and if I wanted anything… so I bummed a couple of cigarettes and lay back on the couch with my leg lifted and smoked away until S found me (and I don’t really know how he found me… I was rather out of it to realise that people would be wondering where I was)… That was such a fun night… even the whole ankle experience… at the end of it all on the way home, in extreme drunkenness I started crying for my Mommy and its so funny that I started crying for my Mommy because my Mommy is not the ‘oh you poor thing, how did it happen’ kind of Mommy… she’s more the ‘serves you right… this is what you get for going out at all hours and drinking and what not’ kind of Mommy.

So this of course brings us to the end… the best kind of alcohol ever… (drum roll, please)… RUM… sweet smelling, molasses fermented rum… rowdy, ass-kicking, rum… Ah rum, how I love it. I’m very glad that I got off the vodka in the early days and switched to rum… what a whole new world it was… I’m at a loss for words right now… I should probably be under the influence of some rum to write more eloquently about it … my favourites are Old Monk (I hate Old Cask for some reason) and Bacardi Lemon (affectionately called lime juice)… but I also like plain ol’ Bacardi Superior and Bacardi Oro and Reserva… I’ve had some lethal Jamaican Coruba rum and I think after Old Monk, my favourite Indian rum is good ol’ Kodais (I don’t even know how its spelt… I am referring to the Bangalore one)… But has anyone tried Bacardi 151… I think its 60% alcohol or something and I almost threw up slamming half a shot and couldn’t even drink it when it was mixed with coke.

But I’ve drunk rum at the oddest of times and the oddest of places and it has always delivered a good time… I’ve drunk rum with coke and orange juice and sprite and pineapple juice and I’ve even drunk it with fucking water whenever we’ve run out of coke at a slumber parties at my house… Old Monk & water is just fucking foul by the way… we’ve finished a whole bottle of Bacardi at 5 am as we watched the sun rise and the train glide into Londha station one hazy December morning… … we’ve drunk it in paper cups in backseats of cars with no ice and warm coke and we’ve sipped it in style sitting in beach house gazebos… we’ve mixed it in 500ml bottles of coke to quickly slam on the road on the way to a party (the ever present “ready mix”) and we’ve drunk it in Pina Coladas and Mai Tais… I’ve finished a quart of rum in my room one night by myself and sneaked down and stole some of my Dad’s to keep the buzz going one jobless night.

Under the influence, I have professed my love and undying friendship to many a rowdy rum compatriot… I have danced till the cows came home and sung till I couldn’t sing another note… I have pretended to be sober with family and how many times have I driven home in such a state… I have puked my guts out and laughed my ass off… I have cried like the world was ending and I have eaten like there was no tomorrow… I have yelled at anyone who would listen (including my boss) about my current depressing work situation (this actually happened last Friday in a marathon Bacardi session – I think I had at least 12 drinks in total) and I have karaoke-d like it was going out of style… all in all, I really do love that little drink called rum. Remember that Bacardi ad with all the people chilling and drinking in the tropical island type place and on a yacht and such and singing this song…

Be what you want to be
Taking things the way they come
Living life the easy way
And sippin’ on Bacardi Rum

I used to love that ad before I started drinking and I’d actually forgotten all about it until now. There may not have been yachts or a tropical islands but we have had some very good times sippin’ on all sorts of rum… May the good times roll on… Cheers!

Well, show me the way to the next whiskey bar... Oh, don’t ask why…

2005-10-27T13:30:00.000+10:00

By the way, I was extremely wasted when I wrote that last entry. I’m not sure if anyone picked up on that… skilful that I am at hiding my highness. Haha, as if… you can always tell if I’m high from a mile away. But anyway, I was high on wine so I myself was not fully aware of the extent of my highness. Wine is so strange that way… two glasses pretty much get you to the “I’m so happy” stage and after that it can go either way really quickly for me… feel really sleepy, head starts hurting, bad mood, stomach contents start heading north, etc. etc. OR drink a few glasses more, everything is fine as wine as far as stomach contents go, head buzzes quite happily, and anything goes in terms of dancing, singing, eating, etc. etc. But still at the end of this nice side of wine also my head eventually starts hurting and sleep beckons and all and the next morning always feels like a professional football team spent the whole night practicing in my head. And I know what you’re thinking… ah, it must be all the cheap wine, but no, my wine hangovers do not discriminate. Once, my visiting uncle took us to an incredible fancy Italian restaurant/wine bar and we tried at least three different types of fucking expensive wine and it was the same old saga the next morning. So why do I drink wine you ask? I’m not entirely sure… sometimes there’s nothing else on offer, sometimes my stomach is too full to handle anything heavy like spirits and Coke, sometimes I think “Oh yes, two glasses of wine to get a nice buzz and no more drinking because I don’t want to get drunk”… that plan always fails of course because I can never halt at that nice buzz stage… I prefer to not drink at all or just get totally wasted… There’s nothing worse than running out of booze when you’re halfway there… its really like taking you to the top of the mountain and showing you what you can’t have.

Well anyway, we have established that wine and me are not best friends. Having said that though, I absolutely adore homemade wine and Christmas in Madras is always a bumper season of slamming bottles of homemade wine. Every time I’ve had a wine party at my house on Christmas night, everyone pretty much has a bottle for themselves. Much fun. Must remind Mom to start stocking bottles for this year, now only.

Wine’s close compatriot is beer of course. Mmm… Beer… Come to think of it, beer is possibly the first taste of alcohol I ever had because my Dad was in the habit of giving me tiny sips now and then when I was a kid because I used to think it looked absolutely wonderful… the golden colour and the white froth and all. How funny, I was just typing this and thinking about my Dad and he calls unexpectedly. There are forces at work a lot of the time I tell you. Anyway, I never really enjoyed beer until I came to Australia. And by the way Fosters is a really shit Australian beer and no one here drinks it… how they bloody promote it in India like it’s as synonymous with Australia as Waltzing Matilda.

But there’s a time and a place for beer and again I am limited to what conditions I can drink it in. For example, if I’m starting my drinking on a Friday evening and plan to be out until the wee hours, beer is a big No No because my stomach just feels really full and all the gas builds up and I just feel like I’m going to explode. But if I’m just hanging out on a warm Sunday afternoon in the park playing cards and Dumb Charades and have no deeds to do before I sleep, I’m quite happy to drink three beers and go to bed with a smile on my face and a lovely beer buzz in my head. Its also quite pleasing to sip a cold beer when everyone and everything is winding down after a huge night of partying and all we can afford is a Rs.100 bottle of Kingfisher compared to the relatively expensive Rs.150 for an Old Monk & Coke… I’m just randomly quoting figures by the way, I can’t really remember the prices. But I think that when it comes to taste, there is no other alcohol that is quite as exciting as beer because there is just so much freaking variety. I’ve tried many different beers from different countries and some of my personal favourites are Australia’s own Beez Neez, Belgium’s Stella Artois, Australia’s James Boags, Mexico’s Corona (without the lemon though), and quite recently I was introduced to a very delicious German beer called Hansa Pils. Mmm… Beer…

Moving on to my favourite alcohol genre… Spirits… in all shapes and sizes… well, actually not… I’m quite fussy here also. Let’s talk vodka. Most people I know first started drinking with vodka. I don’t why this was but when I think about that horrible Romanov vodka we used to drink for lack of better options I seriously wonder how it did not just kill us… that too, we used to only take shots when we first started… The only picture this presents in my head is one of acid corroding our insides. But anyway, it was all good fun to get SMASHED on two shots of vodka… so much cheaper and nicer on the waistline also because of no added Coke calories… Since those heady “get smashed on two drinks” days, quality of vodka has improved steadily. All the Absolut and Smirnoff varieties available these days make for nary a dull moment. And has anyone tried Stolichnaya vodka? I’m not sure if its very good or not but I have had a couple of fun nights on this vodka. But still, vodka is still not what really gets my juices flowing. I’ll drink it if there’s nothing else but wouldn’t really go out and buy some for myself… although, there is a very nice ad on TV these days for something called Absolut Cut and the ad is incredibly tempting, so we’ll see. And how about the rumour that vodka causes impotence in men… don’t know how true it is but I do share this tip with any boy I know who drinks vodka. And then there’s that whole “oh, but vodka doesn’t smell so its perfect to avoid letting your parents what you’ve really been up to” but that is such bull crap… all forms of alcohol smell and it doesn’t matter if you take two shots or two sips… anyone with a keen sense of smell (like me) will immediately be able to tell if you’ve been naughty or nice

It seems there is a lot more to cover than I originally thought so looks like this will have to be continued. But in the meantime, do share your views on wine, beer and vodka. White or red? Best beer ever? Drank vodka the very first time you drank? And if you’re a teetotaller, I’d like to hear from you too… and hang on, don’t call AA yet… I only drink once a week except for holidays and special occasions…

To be continued…

Well it's too late, tonight, to drag the past out into the light

2005-10-23T22:26:00.000+10:00

It’s been so long since I’ve written that suddenly this whole weekend the words have been tumbling out in my head and sometimes I really wish I had a Dictaphone or something so I could record these things I want to say as they come up in my head. Fuck, that was one hell of a long sentence.

So anyway, lots to tell. Work is really crap and I really want to get out of here but for now I’m just going to chill here because I’m going on holiday and what not. But like seriously, work is SOOOOO crap its not funny. Its just too complicated to get into right now so I’m just going to pretend that everything is hunky dory. And you know what, in my head, everything is really hunky dory because all I can think of is India… Madras… my home… my family… my friends… my dogs… it’s so close I can almost reach out and touch it. But of course I can’t… because there’s still a month and a half or so to get through… But then I think about it again and it’s like, what the fuck is 1.5 months in the greater scheme of things… because in my head, I’ve already planned the whole holiday… and in my head, everything is as it should be, as it used to be…

Last night I went to a friend’s house for a birthday party… and it was at his house, in his backyard… I can’t even remember how long it’s been since I’ve sat around in someone’s backyard… Backyards fucking ROCK! It was just so nice to sit there in someone’s honest to goodness house… normally it’s someone’s shitty rented apartment… Backyards remind me of house parties in Madras… how many have there been… my own house and its “front yard”… what tales it could tell… my terrace too… well if it came down to it, what tales my dogs could tell also… they’ve been there throughout… and I remember people trying to get my dogs stoned… poor babies… as if I hadn’t tried that already when I used to smoke in my bathroom before going to bed… they were just not into it… smart doggies!!

Today I went to a Cuban Jazz festival at a winery in Melbourne’s famous Yarra Valley… it was much fun, I say… there was dancing and bottles and bottles of wine… there were Salsa lessons that nobody followed really, and there were more bottles of wine… and there were grey skies and blue skies and raindrops on my face and the sun shining brightly… it was surreal... you know, that wine kinda lazy high...

It’s been a weekend of U2 and James Blunt… re-listening to U2 classics like “One” and “With or Without You” and discovering new songs like “Goodbye, My Lover” and “Tears and Rain”…

Well its too late, tonight, to drag the past out into the light… Its really quite something else to be going home again… its like a warm glow you can’t get away from really… Oh shit, working 10 hour days… oh wait, going home in a month and a half… its all OK…

You say goodbye, and I say Hello...

2005-10-10T12:35:00.000+10:00

This is to announce the early retirement of this blog. My heart is just not in it anymore and I think I'd like to stop now before I lose the urge to write completely... because that would just be not right. So anyway, I am taking a break and I have to say it was a really fun trip. When my professor introduced us to Blogger in 2003 and went on about blogging being the next big 'community-building' tool, we kinda dismissed it all as geek speak. But he was right and I think he would be terribly impressed with the online community that I felt such a part of in the last few months.

I'm sure I'll be back soon. And I'll be sure to look you all up... Don't go anywhere, you hear ;)

Anyway, don't want to get too senti or anything... For now, its so long, and thanks for all the fish :)

Last night I had the strangest dream. I sailed away to China, on a little rowboat to find ya…

2005-10-06T15:38:00.000+10:00

Very lazy to blog about anything original so I will give you some random recycled rambling excerpts from the rubbish I wrote three years ago and that I recently rediscovered thanks to recovered hard disk. Wow… that must be a personal best record of number of words beginning with R in the same sentence! I must warn you… a lot of it is really random and makes me wonder what the hell I was thinking back then!

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Sometimes you think about life back home and you wonder what you miss the most, apart from the people and dogs of course. It would be easy to say it was the food and the car and the entertainment, but I think it goes beyond that. It’s the smells… I step out on my balcony here (when it’s warm enough) and I only smell the city – dust, fumes, noise (yes, I can smell noise)! At home I’d often wake up to smells of people cooking… rich, spicy aromas. Sometimes I’d wake up to the wonderful smell of rain. And when I enter my house, it’s the smell of food and dogs… And my room, just the right amount of perfume in the air… it was perfectly balanced. If I smoked, the balance was destroyed and I worked painstakingly to restore it. It never failed to bring a smile to my face whenever I entered my room and caught a whiff of that familiarity…. like an old friend. And my parents’ room, so comforting… And my Dad’s aftershave… every single day I’d smell it in the living room, on the phone and in the car. And strangely enough the smells change as the seasons change. Summer has such a distinctive smell… it reminds me of something musty and old. Christmas leaves the smell of wine and cake in the air. When I first got here I imagined singing “I’ll be home for Christmas, if only in my dreams”. But now I will be home for Christmas and I can hardly wait.

Last night I had a strange dream… it was me arriving for the first time in a foreign country. However the trams were strangely elevated and you had to take an escalator to get to the tracks. Something or someone informed me it was San Francisco… There were strange people in the dream… people I once knew but didn’t seem to know anymore. There were strange happenings in the dream… things I can’t remember in the harsh daylight of reality, but I do know that everything happened on that strange elevated tram. I wonder if I even bought a ticket!

Saturday, 7 December 2002

Editorial Note: I remember now that I was very very drunk when I wrote this!

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My goodness, I can’t wait to see Holly’s adorable face and Chocolate’s adoring face!! I try so hard to be cosmopolitan and everything but it never really works… when you think about it! Let us be lovers – we’ll marry our fortunes together. It’s so strange sometimes, actually living with people! I am homeward bound and I can’t hardly believe it… everyone looks at being homeward bound as a bad thing. Sometimes it might as well have been the 70’s or 60’s in San Francisco… people are still the same. People are strange but they’re still a part of the 60’s and the 70’s and you don’t get much stranger than that!!

I mean, tonight I was watching Dawson’s Creek and I certainly didn’t have any part to play in any freaking creek – why is high school such an issue? It’s supposed to be the best years of your life but somehow or the other reality gets a grip and you have no choice but to follow the signs… Man, the days I live in are completely awesome.

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My life is flashing before my eyes… I didn’t have the high school years of Dawson’s Creek or the Wonder Year’s for that matter, but I still feel a part of something… strangely enough!!! I love you life… honestly!!

Tuesday, 8 April 2003

Sometimes I wonder about the things I write… Is it really normal for a 21 year old to have such a pessimistic outlook on life? And the constant reminiscing… isn’t that more in keeping with a 65 year old? Or have I already passed through the best years of my life? Life was a lazy race in the sun… How on earth did I get so jaded? There is one thing that’s improved over the years, and that’s my newly straightened hair… Well, not so new anymore but it still gives me such pleasure to look at it in the mirror that I’m convinced it’s going to be taken away from me.

My dreams haunt me terribly… Lately they’re very real and based on people in my life and sometimes I don’t like to wake up. And sometimes I wake up with a smile only to realise it was just a dream. Isn’t life cruel enough without giving us the option of fantasising other versions of it? Some days the lines between fantasy and reality are so blurred, I worry about myself!

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Its understandable why half the population in the world has experimented with drugs at some point in their lives… it’s the easiest form of escapism. Even now, just remembering it all has done enough for me. I am fine… I will be fine!

Friday, 25 April 2003

I think this is the first time I’ve woken up with the urge to write. It’s the dreams I tell you… I can’t escape them no matter how hard I try. I used to think myself lucky that I could actually remember my dreams every time I woke up, but now I wonder about that… The other urge I had this morning was to listen to ‘Wish You Were Here’… We’re just two lost souls swimming in a fish bowl… Have we found the same old fears? Wish you were here… Wish they were here. Maybe I should stop dwelling on all that is gone and focus more on what is to come! But, it just seems so bleak. Hmmmm, I wonder if I was so melancholy before I met Pink Floyd… I think I was… I think I was born this way. Maybe she’s born with it, maybe its Maybelline.

Editorial Note: That last line was an ad for Maybelline. I can’t remember if India had the same ad.

We are the girls of a noble school, whose glorious past has made our rule... To its traditions we'll be true

2005-10-03T13:20:00.000+10:00

To some tagging business from Rat first...

The instructions for this meme (am I the only one who has no idea what a meme is??) are as follows:

1. Delve into your blog archive.
2. Find your 23rd post (or closest to).
3. Find the fifth sentence (or closest to).
4. Post the text of the sentence in your blog along with these instructions.
5. Tag five people to do the same.

My 23rd post was written on June 29, 2005 and it was all about the time I spent in sunny California in May this year. I actually had a song at the beginning so the fifth line of that was

Nothing's gonna stop us now

The 5th line in the actual post itself was

So time to write about California and Los Angeles and my dear friend J...

I just read it again now and boy, did we have a blast for those couple of days. I wanna go on holiday again :( Ok, I'll stop complaining... my next holiday is coming up in 2.5 months. Yippee...

Right, so what else? I had a rather alcoholic weekend... Remember all that leftover booze from my party? Let's just say, it's been taken care of... And the thing was that I had planned to save myself for Saturday night because I had a birthday party to go to and being as old as I am now, drinking really does take its toll on me... gone are the days of drinking for 4 days non-stop and sleeping for 4 hours in between... now I limit myself to one night of bingeing and at least 10 hours of sleep to escape a hangover. But anyway, it seems once we started we couldn't stop on Friday night.

But I put in a good effort for Saturday night as well... I started at about 8 pm at a friend's dinner to meet his parents who were visiting and who I hadn't met in many years. Then we went to this really cool bar called The Long Room... apparently it literally has the longest bar in Melbourne and it stretches from one end of the "long" room to the other. It also has this really cool tapas area that looks like its been set up for an old-fashioned seven course meal type banquet and there were little alcoves that could be curtained for privacy and there were animal heads all over the place and polished wood tables and it was all rather trippy and Hotel California-ish. From here we went to the birthday party at Bambu bar and I proceeded to get very drunk and my two old school friends and I sat and laughed about all the strange girls we had ever studied with. It was so funny to remember some of them... some of them I'd even forgotten existed. All girl Catholic convent schools have to get the award for putting the most bizarre mix of girls together ever! It's amazing we all just didn't claw each other to death along the way!

My night did not end with the party. We met up with a couple of other people and had a drink at Cookie and there was this Aboriginal AFL player (or so he claimed, I must go investigate if it was really him) who was feeling very partial towards Indian looking people because of the number of racial slurs he's had to put up with with people calling him Indian/Paki... not that his own poor race isn't equally discriminated against! Anyway, then everyone came over to our place and we smoked many joints and I passed out at 5 am from excessive levels of alcohol and weed in my system! But hey, I did manage to make it to work today.

Finally I will leave you with a poem S wrote for me. Suddenly he has discovered some latent talent to rhyme and has been sending me poems left, right and centre. His next plan is to add some bad language and turn it into Hip Hop...

This morning I had to switch off the alarm
And for that, I had to stretch my arm

Then I saw the face I would miss
Couldn’t help but give it a kiss

Looking forward to seeing you tonight
Only then will I feel alright

Seven years has gone so fast, wake me up when September ends

2005-09-27T16:37:00.000+10:00

One final entry and then the birthday chapter can be closed for a year. September is really quite a crazy month with all the birthdays of people I know and it seems everywhere I go in blogworld, I am greeted with more birthday tales. And another friend from school is also turning 24 on the 30th so still one more September birthday party left for me!

So, the party was mad. I wish I could give you some highlights but I really don’t remember anything. Not in the ‘I was so wasted and can’t remember a thing’ way but it was all just a blur and there were so many people and conversations happening at the same time that by the end of the night I had no clue what had happened. I was just very drunk as was everyone else and I can chalk it up as another wild night to my ever-so-long list of wild nights. I did some quick mental math also (ok I lied, I had to use my fingers and also some pen and paper) and there were 26 people in total including my household and only 2 people didn’t drink (one was driving and the other is a teetotaller) and everyone brought shitloads of alcohol… and I mean, shitloads… and this was hard alcohol… whisky, bourbon, vodka, rum… no baby stuff for us… it was about 15 bottles in total… the next morning I looked and there was 1 bottle of Smirnoff left, half a bottle of Bacardi, half a bottle of Malibu and some dreadful UDL (disgusting vodka pre-mixes) cans, some of which have been there since last New Years. So basically 24 people polished off about 12 bottles of alcohol… that is so wrong and so right at the same time.

And speaking of alcohol, a couple of friends from work bought a whopping 1125ml bottle of Bacardi to bring to my party (because they are all aware of my rum obsession) and they hid it in the office and forgot to bring it along that night and now it is sitting here on my desk taunting me in its full alcoholic glory. I think I am going to put it back into hiding because it is frightening me a little.

One of my friends also did a quick drug run in between and brought us some stuff to smoke from his house. And we smoked it in the cutest little pipe… it was so small and shiny and cute.

All of the pictures are of drunk faces… I was too busy getting drunk to worry about blog-worthy photos. Anyway, I have blurred a couple for your viewing pleasure.

Here are some people taking vodka shots… I did not participate for the sake of my health and well-being

Here are the beautiful helium balloons that my friends from work got me. They are so bright and colourful and happy and I got immense pleasure from looking at them

Say Hello to Scooby Dooby Doo… the most popular guest at the party. One of my friends from work brought him along and I was rather concerned Scooby was going to poop all over the carpet and add to the general alcohol and food stains. But Scooby was very well-behaved and everyone lavished much attention on him and didn’t want him to leave. Poor little Scooby was originally a farm dog (he belonged to my friend’s husband, the farmer who gave me those shot glasses and liquor bottles) but he was never cut out to be a farm dog and I think the cows terrified him no end and he was basically very traumatised and they gave him to this guy G at work and he’s like this single, middle-aged guy and they basically love each other to death now and it was the start of a very beautiful relationship. So that’s the story of Scooby.

I received some nice presents from friends who came to the party also. Firstly my four work friends who sit around me at work wrote the most random, rambling convoluted tale about me and my dog Holly based on all the nonsense I’ve ever said to them over 1.5 years. I would share it with you, only you’d think they or me (or both) were on crack! It was very sweet, all the same. They also got me Lazy Shit from the Turd family. We got another friend Dumb Shit a while back and slowly we must build the whole family.

I also received:

a Beatles Abbey Road LP

a Beatles ‘A Hard Day’s Night’ DVD

a beautiful chain

a beautiful bracelet

a funky MNG top

a really cool lantern type thing with candle

some yummy Ferrero Rochers (which have been attacked already)

some flowers and a bottle of wine

Birthdays I tell you… how I love them!

And what a lovely surprise I received in the mail yesterday… this year, I only received ONE greeting card by post from my grandparents and am very surprised I didn’t get a few from my parents and sister. So anyway, yesterday, I received this beautiful handwritten letter from my favourite girls in the whole world, Rat and Sista T.

It is as beautiful as some of the stuff we made when we were 11 and discovered glitter pens and things for the first time – even the handwriting is the same. Isn’t it funny how their handwriting hasn’t changed all that much since we were 11 and yet here we are at 24 (and 23 for baby Sista T) and one is a successful blogger operating out of Madras and another is an expectant mother waiting for baby in Delhi and the third is a smoker looking to escape corporate life in Melbourne. How the world turns and pulls us along.

Ok, that was my philosophy for my 24th year. I will leave you now. Wake me up when November ends because that’s when the next love-attention-party-drugs-alcohol-presents fest of Christmas begins!!

Once there was this girl who wouldn't go and change with the girls in the change room

2005-09-26T13:22:00.000+10:00

The infamous Rat has also hit the big 24 today. Most of you already read her blog and let me just confirm that she is as sweet and genuine and funny and sincere in real life as she is on her blog. Sometimes it’s difficult to say the things we really feel about the people we really love because then you run the risk of becoming all corny and sugary but hey, it’s not like I haven’t done any of this already so here goes…

Once there was a girl called Rat and a girl called Penny Lane and they attended kindergarten and junior school together but weren’t really friends or anything. For one thing, we had our respective best friends already and for another thing, Rat’s Mom and her best friend’s Mom were teachers in our junior school and so all the other teachers used to be very nice to these two little Rats (we’ll call them both that for convenience) and they were always left in charge of the class when the teachers had a meeting and so quite naturally they used to be very smug about all this and the rest of us used to bitch about them nicely. Anyway, I started inviting them to my birthday party from the fourth standard onwards and so we sort of started getting along and then in the fifth standard, Rat, Sista T and me were school captains and we ditched class to take care of some younger class in the sports field (I don’t know why we thought we’d get away with that) and boy, was our teacher mad. But it was like our first escapade together and the start of a beautiful (and highly mad) relationship.

In high school, Rat lost all her position of power as a teacher’s daughter :p and was integrated into our larger school gang that had been together since junior school… there were like about 12 of us I think and we had many good times together but we also fought and bitched a lot and by age 13, everyone broke up into smaller groups and it was Rat, Sista T and another girl and me and that was really the beginning of you me and you. I’m not going to get into the story of you me and you again… there are just too many stories and too many memories.

Let it just be known that you couldn’t find a sweeter, more fun individual anywhere… she’s thoughtful and kind and is loved by everyone who knows her. In fact, she’s probably the only one who’s still in touch with every single friend of hers from any point in her life including most of her ex-lovers. And as for me and her, its just one big laugh fest when we’re together and a huge part of that laughing is because of the crazy questions she keeps asking. At one point, we called her Rat Question Mark because she didn’t talk and only asked seemingly irrelevant questions. Anyway, I could go on and on about the madness of Rat but if you’re not lucky enough to know it for yourself, well then, all the more bad luck to you!

Thank you dear Rat for being the best friend a girl could ask for and thank you for keeping me entertained all these years… I know you wanted a poem but it seems I must save something for Christmas and I hope this was satisfactory for now. Have a Happy Happy Birthday and I hope your party rocked. And let's keep working on getting you to Melbourne so we can live happily ever after together ;)

P.S. The title song lyrics have nothing to do with Rat... it was just one of the songs we used to laugh our asses off at when we were younger!

I need you more than anyone darling, you know that I have from the start

2005-09-23T12:14:00.000+10:00

So much to tell… so little time… Birthday has been a total blast thus far. Actually it started last weekend itself – I am a strong believer in the birthday week concept… why celebrate just one day when you can celebrate a whole week ;) Anyway, last weekend involved much drinking and smoking and singing and it was a very tired me that started the working week on Monday.

Wednesday night, we drank some beers at home and stared at the clock from 10:30 pm willing it to go faster because I was so sleepy and tired. But I did perk up considerably when it neared 12:00 and then there was much hugging and kissing before I demanded my presents. S bought me some kick ass stuff and he even wrote me a cute poem in my card (what a year for poems this has been) and it was all very sweet and thoughtful. So presenting my hoard:

One funky iPod Nano – how tiny and sleek and sexy does it look. And don’t miss the packaging… it all fits into that double CD type box

One DKNY watch – very nice. My old watch I’ve been wearing for about 5 years and as if it knew its time was up, the battery stopped the other day and I hadn’t replaced it because I had a feeling I was getting a new one ;)

A Bob Dylan DVD which I shall watch this weekend

A photo frame because he wants all my photos to be consolidated in the one place and not displayed all over the room as they are currently

And perhaps the sweetest gift of them all, a DVD with all my old music and photos and documents that I felt were lost for good when my old PC packed up and which he recovered for me.

And he also bought me flowers last night and I have forgotten to take a picture of them. Damn!

My housemate T also bought me a very cool gift. He bought the poster and did much artwork himself to mount it and frame it, etc. Check it out hanging proudly in the living room…

I went to work rather late last morning and was greeted with the following beautiful things…

A bouquet with little notes from most of my friends

A pair of earrings that my friend actually made. Talent, I say…

A card and a beautiful shell pendant from two of my other friends

Two shot glasses and six tiny liquor bottles from the husband of one of my friends who remembers my last birthday quite vividly because the week before I went to their house for a party and got absolutely wasted on tequila shots (two friends and I finished 1.5 bottles between us) and very vocally insisted he come to my party the following week (he’s this 6 foot 5 inch well-built farmer man). I haven’t given such loud performances in a while. Maybe tonight…

I made bludging at work an art form yesterday… I did absolutely nothing except talk to people and answer phone calls. There were so many phone calls also… much fun it was. Parents, grandparents, Rat, JR, Sista T, Snoop (whose call I missed :( ), aunts, uncles, cousins, friends here and lots of emails too.

Lunch was a very lazy affair at TGIF. I shouted a round of drinks (we only had one round since we had to go back to work)… Check out my Ultimate Long Island Iced Tea… its not that lame Long Island Iced Tea your grandma sips… this is the Ultimate one. Look at the size of the bloody glass… Anyway, it didn’t really do much except make me very sleepy at work that afternoon (not that I was doing anything except transferring music to my iPod).

Finally last night, I took S and T out for dinner to Blue Train. Had a couple of Cosmopolitans (I’m actually a rum and coke chick but its nice to drink colourful drinks on your birthday even if they don’t get you high) and then we finished off at P.J. O’ Brian’s with two rounds of Pink Pussy shots!

With about half an hour left of my birthday I got to speak to my sister. Her friends had thrown her a surprise party at home about then and I was treated to a rousing rendition of Happy Birthday to me from all her friends. Madam was more interested in hanging out with her boys and girls than talking to me so I let her go after telling her to check her email because I emailed her the poem but I don’t think she’s had the time and today she’s off on an interstate class trip. Ah well, that’s 16 year olds for you…

Ended the night by listening to tons of my old music on my brand new iPod Nano for about two hours and very sleepy at work now. Damn… have to party my ass off tonight also!

S has been awesome throughout… pandering to my every whim. I wish it was my birthday every day. I suppose I’ll have to settle for the week.

And where was I before the day, that I first saw your lovely face

2005-09-21T16:15:00.000+10:00

Tomorrow is my baby sister’s birthday. Well she’s not really a baby anymore but since she was born when I was 8 years old, I’ll always think of her as my baby sister. So, tomorrow is also my birthday. And I’ve already heard all the jokes like ‘Wow, what planning’ and ‘Mallu family wanted to save on two birthday parties’… just for the record, we have always had two birthday parties (sometimes even a third for family) except for her 1st birthday and my 9th. That was a funny birthday party. It was at the Gymkhana club and there was a merry-go-round that I kept stopping every 5 seconds to go greet everyone who arrived and there was a puppet show that was damn stupid, or was it a magic show? But since so many people were invited for her 1st birthday party, I know I got TONS of presents!

Anyway, I still remember the day my father told me I was going to have a little brother or sister. For as long as I could remember before then, every time I prayed in Church or wished for something at Christmas, there was always a ‘Dear God, please give me a baby sister’. And He actually delivered on September 22, 1989. She was really due on the 25th but decided to come out early. That night, I remember I spent the night in my parents room as a treat (I was going to be 8 after all and it was time I got used to sleeping alone) and halfway through the night, I was woken up and sent off to sleep in my room and the next morning by the time I got all dressed up (how exciting was it to not wear a uniform for one day) and armed myself with the traditional birthday sweets to distribute at school, Her Highness had arrived. After a terribly exciting day at school (it was an exam day, so I couldn’t have taken the day off) talking about my new baby sister, I rushed to the hospital to see her for the first time. And she was everything I had always imagined she would be… a cute and soft and pretty and talcum powder smelling overall adorable bundle!

She was my babe, and she still is. I constantly told her she was the best birthday present I’d ever received. I was fascinated by her when she was a baby. I had my own real life doll to play with (although my Mom never let me cut her hair). And as a toddler, she was absolutely adorable, always saying the most outrageous things. And what a freaking temper she had… she’d throw the loudest of tantrums and yell she wanted things “now only” and when she was pissed off, she had this hilarious pout and I’d call her Miss Piggy (from the Muppet Show) and that would just make her madder than before…. Once, she got so mad, she just grabbed the glasses off my face and snapped them in two… I wanted to fucking kill her. But she was always incredibly apologetic later… she’d tear the posters on my room door in anger and later she’d slip a little note saying Sorry and beautifully decorated with flowers and all that childish jazz and Rs. 50 to buy new ones (she always had shitloads of cash also)!

So she was all very sweet and lovable for a long time and then from about age 8 to 14, she became the most insufferable Miss “I want to know it all and think I know it all” for miles around. She made it her life mission to find out exactly what I was up to, which boys I had a crush on, what I was spending my money own, etc. etc. She was really something else… she pissed me off on an almost continuous basis. We had very rare moments of bonding… like when we played with our dogs or watched Friends on TV every weeknight at 8 pm… and she still ran to my room some nights and made me hug her till she fell asleep if my parents had a fight, and she still slipped me little notes of apology when we fought. But mostly it was yelling and screaming or pretending she didn’t exist or telling her without fail that she was the worst birthday present I’d ever received.

Then I left to Australia and I’ve hung out with her thrice since. Last year, I was in India for two weeks and barely got to see her or talk to her but already I could tell that she was becoming a sweet young girl and wasn’t a silly kid anymore. And of course, she somehow managed to pop a sweet note saying she loved me into a suitcase that I took to Delhi for the wedding. This year, I really got to hang out with her day and night in Virginia for two weeks and it was just incredible getting to know her like that without the distraction of friends and parties and school and Madras in general. I found out again that she was really funny and sweet and really a cool chick… and did I mention, she’s become such a hottie… watch out world, here comes my sister, da bomb! The past couple of years I don’t know if it was just all the teenage angst or what, but she went totally grunge and wore all these horrid shapeless pants and loose t-shirts… then for this trip, she told me to buy her strappy tops and party tops and I was so excited she was over that phase I went out and bought her at least 15 funky items of clothing and boy, did she look hot in them!

Anyway, there’s something about baby sisters… they get a pretty bum deal sometimes… they become the slaves of older siblings, they are the proud recipients of hand-me-downs quite often and everything they ever do is compared to what their older sibling did at that age… but also, and they may not realise this, the need to protect and defend and nurture and pamper is so strong, its almost maternal… when I go shopping before heading home for a visit, I buy stuff for everyone, but at the top of my list and at every shop I go to, its always her I want to buy the world for in an attempt to make up for not being around in the last couple of years. And I know she adores me as I adore her and secretly she wants to be just like me (and she’s actually getting there, family get confused about who’s talking and who’s wearing what) and maybe she even misses me a little in the midst of her active high school life… I know that I miss her a lot these days and I can’t wait to see her again in December. I’ve written her a poem (this is the first poem I have ever written in my entire life, so the rhyming is pretty sad and basic) and I haven’t decided if I’m going to give it to her yet.

And as for me, I’m turning 24 tomorrow. I feel old old old! I know its not really old in the grander scheme of things, but I can’t help feeling my youth just happily slipping away from me. Anyway, I am expecting many cool presents and fun lunches and dinners and phone calls from all and sundry (oooh, now I get to get birthday wishes from bloggers too, what fun) and of course big birthday bash on Friday night! I’m still feeling old but I have the rest of the year to worry about that… the next few days is all about celebrating the fact that I was born ;)

The Looking Glass

I remember the day you were born
It stands clearly in my mind
From the minute I saw your tiny face
I never wanted to leave your side

You grew older and more cheeky
You were my favourite clown
Your antics always made me smile
If ever I was down

There were times I may have shouted
There were times you pissed me off
It was all a part of growing up
I regret I didn’t show more love

Now I look at you all grown up
And I feel so very proud
That my baby sister
Is adored by such a crowd

Today you turn sweet sixteen
And I turn twenty four
You are the perfect sister
I couldn’t have asked for more

We could be identical twins
Except we’re eight years apart
This is the lamest poem ever
Except its straight from the heart

They say we look alike
At times they get confused
The ears, the nose, the eyes
Our smiles when we’re amused

Sometimes the resemblance is uncanny
For example, when we frown
But there are differences too
Where my hair is black yours is dark brown

You have a dimple in your chin
And more than a single piercing in your ears
I have a dot on my nose
To see you cry fills my eyes with tears

We are forever tied
By the bond of birthdays and blood
With our best friends Chocolate and Holly (wish I had space to name them all)
We have frolicked in the mud

Before we can meet again
A lot of time may pass
But whenever you want to see me
Take a look in the looking glass

Welcome To My Life

2005-09-16T14:50:00.000+10:00

Sit back and relax folks… we have a hell of a lot to cover. I was tagged by The Lil’ Le Poutski and then Rat went and exposed her whole work area so I’ve decided to combine everything and expose it all.

Let’s begin with my bag… that storage device that I cant seem to get away from. I am a creature of habit and can’t be bothered moving all my stuff from bag to bag so I pretty much use the same bag for the working work and it’s an enormous pain in the ass to move stuff to my smaller bags on the weekends. Such trials, I tell you…

Anyway, the bag itself was one of the items one of my aunts bought me in May when I was in the US (as an aside, its great meeting up with aunts/grandparents who try to make up for years of no birthday and Christmas presents in two weeks). I really like the bag and the design reminds me of decorative icing on a cake.

In my bag, I carry (sounds like one of those memory games)…

A cell phone carry case that my Mom brought me from India. I keep my cell phone in it while its in the bag so it doesn’t get scratched. I don’t care that much about my cell phone, but have to use the cell phone carry case no?

My camera in its carry case. Damn, why does everything have a freaking case? I bought a really cool 7.2 mega pixel Sony Cybershot in May and I carry it with me everyday for no real reason. Digital cameras are not that bad, I guess. I stuck on to my 10 year old film camera for so long because nothing beats holding photos in your hand. So now I’ll just spend shitloads of money on printing my digital ones.

One Nine West wallet

The book I am currently reading because otherwise I would go mad with boredom on my 10 minutes to and from work on the tram. Its Salman Rushdie’s Haroun and the Sea of Stories. Its really quite funny and magical and I am enjoying it immensely – not as dark and intense as his other ones.

One pack of Wrigley’s Wild Berry Extra drops. Did you know that after eating, the pH level in your mouth drops considerably and allows cavity causing bacteria to attack? Wrigley’s Extra drops helps to restore the pH balance in your mouth so you can have strong teeth and healthy gums (fyi – straight from the pack). They are really yum and I am quite addicted!

My way cool CK sunnies (and their case;)) which S bought me last December. Before that I had a pair of Ray Bans for about 3 years and they were horribly disfigured towards the end.

Free sample of some vague perfume that I keep for fun

Lipstick and eye pencil for touch ups that I never touch up

Parker pen

One work security pass

One apartment building security pass (what a secure nation I live in)

House keys (2 nos., I told you they were dead serious about this security stuff) and a spare work key if the security pass doesn’t work for whatever absurd reason

Pack of tissues and some vague medicine

Some earrings that I’ve forgotten to take out of the bag at some point

A picture of Jesus Christ with a prayer on the back. I have one of these in every single bag I own because they’re always distributing them in front of Church or the railway station and I feel very bad to throw them away.

One electronic key that has my gym program on it, but more on new gym and peripherals later.

One compact little umbrella (in matching case) that came with the bag and for that I am very grateful because my other umbrella is this big-ass-cover-5-people kind of BMW Williams umbrella that S bought me at Formula 1 time last year when I loooved BMW Williams for Montoya and Ralf. This year I am not supporting any team, its been more of an anti-Ferrari thing and its working also. But more on Formula 1 at the end of the season.

And that concludes the tour of my beautiful earth-toned cavernous bag. Moving on to my wallet…

I have a grand total of $37 and 70 cents. Normally I only have 70 cents but for some reason I’m carrying quite a bit of liquid cash this week. Did you know that Australian notes are plastic and can’t really be torn unless you are fully determined to tear them? And yes, that is England’s Queen Elizabeth on the $5 note… Australia might as well still be a colony of England… we have a public holiday for Her Highness’s birthday and all (not that I’m complaining).

3 ANZ ATM cards… I’m only meant to have 2 and another is in the mail… the bank has been totally screwing with my life for the past month or so.

Artfully covering the ATM cards is my Sub Club Appreciation card. Two more stickers and I get a FREE 12 inch sub from Subway – the Fresh Food People. How fucking cool am I?

My National Bank credit card (which I never use) and my Virgin credit card (which I use too much).

Artfully covering the credit cards is my bloody expensive monthly Metcard.

Some other miscellaneous cards are my Indian driver’s licence which is actually my only form of ID since I don’t carry my passport around the place. I really need to get an Australian one.

We also have my 2003 student card which I am unable to let go of, my government sponsored Medicare health insurance card, a Rent Card if I wanted to pay my rent at the post office, a brand spanking new Port Phillip library card (what was I thinking spending hundreds of dollars on books every couple of months), and an Essential Beauty Club card which makes me an exclusive member of the place I get my eyebrows done at and quite frankly I had forgotten I even had such a card till I looked at it yesterday.

A Bar Secrets card of a bar called Cherry. Bar Secrets is those pack of card type things with a different bar on each card and the bloody things cannot be used as playing cards which I find slightly ridiculous. Anyway, this was in my wallet for a long time because one drunken night I think we meant to go here but eventually didn’t.

Some miscellaneous business cards and notes on my bank a/c details, tax file no., etc.

One bill (I don’t keep receipts unless there is a chance I might need to return something) and one company Cab charge. Again I had forgotten I had this cab charge, so one company sponsored ride home coming up.

One American dollar bill which I keep for sentimental reasons. I only started using this wallet a few months ago and before that I was using a wallet sent by my grandmother a few years ago and she sent the $1 bill in it and I’m still holding on to it.

And finally, a couple of photographs… my family portrait taken six years ago… this is the first thing I see when I open it and if I change wallets, my new one will also need a space for me to keep this photo. Behind the family one, I have two passport photos of S and one of Rat (yes, she’s the red one). When I left India, I asked people to give me their passport pix so I could keep in my wallet and I think she was the only one who had one.

So that’s that. Now a quick view of what I see as soon as I open my eyes every morning…

My bookcase is a total mess and slightly overflowing and I’ve resorted to piling them up beside my bed. I really need a new one.

My slightly large perfume collection – I was obsessed with perfume some years ago and collected them like mad.

My beautiful ancient TV that keeps me entertained when I’m too lazy to sit outside. Please do not miss the measures we’ve resorted to with the equally ancient and broken antenna. Neighbours is currently playing on TV if anyone cares.

My trusty heater that is never far from my side and my trusty alarm clock that never gives me (or anyone else who lives with me) a moment of peace in the mornings.

The Ferrari flag hanging on the wall is NOT mine. I don’t know why I tolerate it.

I like to surround myself with photographs of the people (and dogs) I love and there are quite a few more in other parts of the room/house.

And finally, my space at work… the place I spend most of my waking hours at… hours that would be infinitely more pleasurable spent sleeping, reading or smoking up…

My LCD monitor with my beloved dogs as the wallpaper. Well, dear Holly is no more of course but dear Chocolate is still alive and kicking. I have a post-it note with my name stuck to my monitor because my dear friend M gets kicks out of writing our names beautifully on post-it notes.

Precariously sitting on the top of my monitor is a family of Russian dolls. These are those cool dolls that fit inside the other – so you open the father and pop the mother in and you should’ve already popped all the kids inside the mother. I get immense amounts of amusement from these Russian dolls that I stole from my friend Sh who sits across from me. Also sitting there is a taxi. Everyone in the company got a different type of Matchbox car at some ‘Where are we going as a company’ type meeting. I can’t really remember what the car signified so you can tell I am a highly inspired employee.

You can also see my (well ok, the company’s) IBM T-41 laptop in its my docking station and my (these are really mine) TDK headphones that I listen to my beloved iTunes with, and my (the company’s again) cool Cisco Voice over IP phone.

My cell phone (Nokia 6610i) sits on an ugly dolphin cell phone stand that my friend Sh stole from some Christmas hamper and gave to me.

Many folders and papers and files to make it seem I work very hard and various mugs and stationery items and tissue paper.

Finally, just behind the Cisco phone, you can see a cheery Christmas stuffed dog that Sh gave me as a Christmas present last year. On that same day, we had our department Christmas party and went on this boat cruise and had the traditional Kris Kringle exchange and my Kris Kringle also gave me an identical cheery Christmas stuffed dog and so this second dog got a bit high on the boat cruise and accompanied us to a pub after the cruise and was pictured taking sips of people’s beer. So basically we decided they were twins and while Sober works hard all day in the office, Shitfaced leads a party life in my house (they were named after a set of shot glasses I have… the four stages of drinking… Sober, Drunk, Pissed and Shitfaced)!

With those pearls of wisdom I will leave you. This was really fun by the way and I’m sorry it was so long… there’s just so much to tell!

The day the music died...

2005-09-12T16:03:00.000+10:00

Another weekend gone by and only 10 days left until the big day. The big day refers to my birthday, of course. I’m not one of those people who pretend they don’t care about their birthday and who say things like ‘oh, its no big deal’. I’m one of those people who loves birthdays, especially my own and says things like ‘oh, its my birthday, so drop everything you’re doing and come party with me’. I mean, come on, birthdays are meant to be celebrated and I’ve celebrated every single one of them like they were going out of style. Anyway, we’ll see what happens this year…

On Friday I went to the housewarming party of someone who lives on the ground floor of my apartment building. He had invited everyone in the building and since we’ve never really met any of our neighbours, we dropped in. It was mostly middle-aged to older people and a couple of young people. Shantaram became a topic of conversation as it is prone to become when a white person meets an Indian for the first time and looks for some common ground. I don’t mind… I think its great that so many of them enjoyed the book. They won’t be so biased or culture shocked if they ever visit.

At one point, the host asks me "How do you take that life-altering decision of leaving family and friends and everything familiar behind and starting out fresh in a whole new country and culture"? Fuck, good question! For me, it was never a conscious decision… it was just an undercurrent in everything I dreamed my life would be when I grew up. And when I did grow up, I couldn’t really take it all back… But when I grew up, I realised that I really loved my life in Madras and didn’t think anything could ever compare with it.

Nothing has, so far.

I remember writing something when I left three years ago, something like:

But this is everything I’ve dreamed of since age 7. So why do I wish I was 7 again and this day was still 14 years away?

So these are the choices that we make and we have to stand behind them or we would be left with nothing, no direction, no mistakes to learn from, no right to say ‘I did it’. And there are still choices, there is hope yet! I didn’t mean to get all melancholy like this. Its not that my life is shit or anything but its soooo very different to my previous life in Madras.

There I was a part of a social fabric… there was always someone to call, someone to visit, someone to smoke a cigarette with, someone to smoke a joint with, someone to have a drink in the afternoon with… there were competing priorities… education, family, partying, dogs… rushing off from a family dinner to the night’s drinking gathering… rushing off from Sunday afternoon smokes (in full stoned glory) to catch at least the latter half of Mass (and more importantly, making sure my parents saw me)… rushing off from college to give my sister a lift home, take the dog to the vet, drop the dog back home (sometimes spastically sedated, poor baby) and rush off for the day’s entertainment. Anyway, my point is, it was really quite a happening, never-a-boring-moment kind of existence and then I played the cruel joke upon myself of leaving all that behind to study here.

Now I’m sure lots of people have some really fun times in university here but it just so happened that mine was the only course on the planet that people actually did for the sake of the course itself and not for the sake of getting a stupid degree. The average age was 35 and the most scintillating conversation was about which website was more usable and which website was more community building oriented. There were some fun moments and a couple of smashed moments but mostly it was coursework, coursework and more coursework.

Work at least has been much better… I’m part of a band of merry boys and girls (average age of 23 which is just right) and we get each other through the monotony and drudgery that is corporate life by talking shit all day. And sometimes we hang out on a Friday evening but it’s pretty much a work life/personal life separation thing!

So outside of these two social avenues, there have been the people you meet somehow or the other and some of them are fun and some of them are not and some of them are fun only when drunk and some of them talk too much or don't talk at all. Well obviously, I am extremely choosy… how can I not be when my friends from school and college and Madras and even Bangalore are just some of the coolest people around! I’ve been spoiled with good company and now no one seems to meet those standards.

And as for family, well really, don’t knock ‘em. Its only when they’re not around, you realise how entertaining even they can be. And as for dogs, well I don’t want to start sobbing my heart out now, so I’ll save my dog tales for another day.

So the best thing out of all this is that S and I are as close as two people can be and have had to entertain each other for three years and we aren’t bored yet.

And I really believe that everything happens for a reason and my happening life will come back to me sometime soon.

It seems I’ve forgotten what I even started writing about. The host also asked if I felt that Australia had accepted me and I think I’ll save that can of worms for another day! Got really wasted that night with some people who came over. It was fun. Had a really lazy Saturday, got a haircut, shopped for miscellaneous items, oooh S bought me a pre-birthday gift – a pair of Levis, watched The Interpreter and Hostage on DVD – the first one was shit and the second one was ok! Yesterday I just slept and slept and slept and read a bit in between. Today I have my first gym session in about an hour and I’m really excited about it – you will be hearing much about my fitness regime in the days to come.

For me, the day I left Madras was like the day the music died. Because like American Pie was a semi-autobiographical journey from innocence to adulthood for Don Mclean, so was my life in Madras my journey from innocence into adulthood and one day it ended as all eras tend to and that was the day the music died.

A long long time ago
I can still remember how that music used to make me smile
And I knew if I had my chance that I could make those people dance
And maybe they’d be happy for a while

Invariably, the music that makes me smile always leads back to Madras. They have that saying ‘All roads lead to Rome’ because in those BC days, all roads did literally lead to Rome since they were the only ones building them. For me, all roads lead to Madras… what a name, what a place, what an era!

the Waiting was not In Vain

2005-09-08T12:44:00.000+10:00

Its here… its here! My package from Mint Chutney.

Imagine my excitement to get home last evening and spot a bright pink, exciting looking package addressed to ME. I didn’t even take my coat off before ripping it open and out flowed tons of cute little, sweet smelling things. Let me list them all now:

Mint Mix CD – good stuff, been listening all day. Wont talk about the music anymore so as to not ruin the surprise for the rest of you expecting Mint Mix

Chicago T-shirt – I have a Chicago Hard Rock Café top and a Chicago shot glass and a Chicago mug but never had a Chicago t-shirt before

Chicago Postcard – by the way Mint, I visited the Shedd Aquarium this time around in Chicago. There was a very cute Beluga whale.

Magnets

Nail Kit

Fun pens, fun notepaper, bookmark, cell phone charm

Scented erasers

Keychain

Pocket Mirror

2006 Calendar (with cool vintage crate labels)

and my personal favourite:

Chiclets… tiny size Chiclets… flavoured coated gum Chiclets – I had really forgotten these even existed and I finished the whole packet in about 10 mins… kept popping more and more… it was damn yum and also quite nostalgic. Haven’t had Chiclets in years!

Thanks a lot Mint… was much appreciated… and as said before… the Waiting was not In Vain ;)

2005-09-05T17:28:00.000+10:00

Ok, its been very long and I don’t really feel like *completing* the snowboarding saga. Just some quick bullet points on the rest:

The Saturday afternoon was as tiring as the morning
The instructor tried teaching us how to snowboard backwards although why she thought we would be able to do this when we could barely snowboard forwards, I don’t know. Suffice to say, I tried this twice and took two terrible tumbles and decided that I would stick with the forward henceforth
The instructor also tried to get us on this strange thing called the Poma lift which pulls you upslope by you holding on to a cable attached to this circular thing. Now for skiers, it didn’t seem so bad… they held that circular thing between their legs and it just pulled them up very gracefully. For snowboarders, you hold it under your arm and what happens is the thing actually drags you but your snowboard still doesn’t move so your body gets pulled but your feet don’t move and guess what happens next… that’s right, you fall on your fucking face! Again, suffice to say, two attempts at this has turned me off “pomas” for life!
The instructor made us feel very cool when she said ‘Now remember, snowboarding is an EXTREME sport’!
The instructor taught us how to point our arms to change direction and slow down, etc. and much fun was made of my earnest Staying Alive attempts… all I can say is, it fucking worked!
After the lesson (and a brief 4 pm snack which served as lunch) we bravely attempted the mountain again. This time, my pointing helped me have a really really good run for about 5 secs and of course I got very excited and thought, ‘Ha, there’s really nothing much to this snowboarding business’ and then of course, everything came crashing down as usual as I totally got confused about which arm to point in which direction. B, who watched the entire debacle from the ski lift had much to say about this to everyone else.
Halfway down the mountain, I decided to quit for the day. By now my head was hurting so much, I felt sure some brain damage must have been sustained. So I unstrapped my feet and dragged the snowboard behind me much like taking my dog for a walk and wouldn’t you know it, I slipped even when off the snowboard as it somehow sneaked up under my feet. Next thing I know, I’m on my ass again and I’ve let go of the damn board and it goes hurtling down the mountain at breakneck speed. Everyone around yelled ‘Incoming’ and luckily no one got hit. So that was that…
Sunday we tried skiing and that was slightly calmer. At least I could glide off the freaking lift without losing my balance and falling on my ass. But there were still moments… much easier to break a bone whilst skiing I feel… legs splayed in opposite directions, skis stuck in the snow, etc. etc. Anyway, managed to have a couple of successful runs (fell only once or twice) so there is hope yet… but I think I will give snowboarding another go when I do return to the snow.

And the beach is still my holiday destination of choice, but the snow makes a good winter getaway.

Last week, I went to Sydney twice on freaking work. The first time was on Monday morning, so that was a real blast… waking up at 5 am after two days of the most physical activity I’ve undertaken in many months… I could barely lift my laptop into the overhead compartment. The rest of the week was a blur and then I went to Sydney AGAIN on Friday morning. Whoever said corporate jet setting would be much fun and highly glamorous has got it all wrong. Its just tiring and boring and plays havoc with my ear pressure. I’ve now been to Sydney four times on work and still haven’t seen anything except the Opera House or done anything except eat at McDonald’s (Sydneysiders are not that keen on Subway, I’ve noticed – there are never any around)!

The pic below I took from my hotel room when I last stayed in Sydney a few months ago!

Ok, its Monday evening and I am forcing myself to go sign up at the gym next door. I have three months to get fit before Christmas and my visit to India where I can say ‘Up Yours’ to everyone who made fun of the weight I’d put on the last time I visited. Also, my tummy must be super toned for Neha’s wedding (of Neha C fame) as I am going to be one of her bridesmaids. Yay… I can’t wait (for the wedding, I mean, not the gym)!

Baptisms of Fire (on ice)

2005-08-31T12:52:00.000+10:00

So here I am again… bruised and battered but still in one piece.

So there we were all together in my house on Friday afternoon… 6 snowboarding virgins (2 snow virgins even) and one ex ski instructor. The peace pipe was smoked as it always is at the start of a journey and we were off in two cars. The snow team included me, my boyfriend S, my housemate T, my friend R and her boyfriend K, S’s friend from work B and our friend V.

Roadtripping with my two favourite allies
Fully loaded, we got snacks and supplies

The drive was nice… for once we didn’t argue about the music and just listened to everything that played. And most of it was singable so quite naturally I didn’t shut up for six hours. I even found this CD that I recorded maybe 4 years ago when I first got a CD burner and it was full of songs I hadn’t heard in ages. You Are My Religion, for fuck’s sake and Unforgivable Sinner. I’d forgotten those songs even existed. And as always, I gazed out the window at the rolling hills and country towns and villages and thought of other trips I’ve taken in the past… trips that start out as this one did, with the smoking and the drinking and the driving and the laughing and the singing.

We saw many sheep along the way. Ah, rural Victoria, is there anything quite like it? Please excuse me, I think sheep are damn cute.

So anyway, many smoke breaks and toilet breaks and food breaks later, we caught a glimpse of some snow covered peaks.

These mist covered mountains
Are a home now for me
But my home is the lowlands
And always will be

We drove up the mountain (Mt Hotham, it was), taking corners at terrifying speeds as always… boys will be boys after all. Eventually, it was 9 pm by the time we had settled in and eaten dinner and started sipping our first drinks. By 10:30 pm, we were SMASHED!

To kick things off, we started playing Fuzzy Duck but I think everyone’s just become too damn good at it these days… fuck-ups are rare and few between. Fuzzy Duck is this highly entertaining drinking game which involves people saying Fuzzy Duck in a circle until someone says Does He. The direction is then reversed and the phrase changes to Ducky Fuzz. After a few drinks most people mess up and say things like Fuck He Does and Does He Fuck, and when you mess up, you slam a shot! So anyway, we’ve been playing this for a long time at my famous fruit punch shot nights but I’ll save those experiences for another day.

We gave up on Fuzzy Duck and started playing Dumb Charades. S, T and I were on one team against the other four and we were on a fucking roll, I kid you not. We’re not normally that great or anything but that night, we just had some kind of connection going and were guessing everything in about 10 seconds and the other team was just losing miserably. And sometimes the most obvious things are the hardest to guess… T was trying to charade a sounds like for ‘brass’ and acted smoking some ‘grass’. We got what he was trying to do alright, but S and I must’ve said every single other word we knew for it from ganga to Mary Jane and just completely missed the basic, first word I ever learnt in the whole business of smoking up. By the end of all this shouting and screaming, we were extremely smashed and decided to go hang outside in the snow.

The photo below was taken to capture my comic attempts at drinking my drink with my gloves on. It made for such a blogworthy pic though since it preserves my anonymity ;)

Outside in the snow we drank and took drunken photos on someone’s parked snowmobile and bonded with various other guests who also came out to hang in the snow and shared the love (the weed love, that is) and smoked many cigarettes (this was also terribly difficult with my gloves). All in all, it was a very fun night and we went to bed extremely late. The "single" boys were in a room full of bunk beds and it was much fun to climb up to the top bunk and pretend one was on the Brindavan Express.

Barely five hours later, we were rudely awoken by the bright morning sunlight. Apparently sunlight is always much brighter in snow towns because of the sun reflecting off the snow – I had not thought of this before!

We showered and dressed in many layers (at least I did, I don’t take chances with the cold) and drank much water to combat our hangovers and spent some time renting our gear. So on top of all my layers, I had a puffy snow jacket and waterproof ski pants, some horrendously heavy snowboard boots, and a very cumbersome snowboard. Thus armed, we set off for the slopes.

As mentioned before, B used to be a ski instructor and he was on skis while the rest of us were on snowboards and he was still able to give us some basic pointers on snowboarding. After about half an hour of gliding around on flat terrain, we became overly ambitious and decided to take the ski lift up one of the slopes even before we had our beginner’s lesson which was some time away.

The ski lift itself is obviously a terrifying experience on its own. I fell trying to get on it (you try getting to the lift from the gate on time with one foot strapped into your snowboard and the bloody seats don’t stop for long enough) and I fell getting off it (again, you try gliding off the lift with one foot strapped in and then having to get out of the way quickly before the next set of people get off it)!

Once I had regained my composure somewhat, the enormity of what we were attempting hit me and terrified me no end. We were at the top of a very tall slope… we couldn’t even see the home stretch, and we couldn’t even stand up on our boards without sliding off in the wrong direction or falling on our asses. If it had not been for B, who very patiently helped me up every time I fell, and who prevented me from falling every time I tried to stand up, and who tried to show me how to stand without sliding or falling, I would’ve surely slipped off the side of that mountain onto the hard road below.

So we attempted the long slide down the mountain. Every couple of feet, I would have a tremendous fall that rattled every single bone in my body. The fun part was that every single one of us was going through the same so once I fell I’d look around to see who was around me because surely one of them would be nearby, also on their ass. Some of their falls were incredibly funny to witness as I’m sure some of my falls were. Getting up (and staying up) after having fallen was certainly the hardest thing to do. And if anyone had told me that I would actually feel hot on a snow covered mountain in 4 degree Celsius temperature, I would’ve laughed scornfully at them. But it was hot and I actually began to regret my many layers because snowboarding is hard work, and the sun was beating down pretty fierce that day. So every time I fell, utterly and completely exhausted, I’d lie down on the soft, clean snow for a while and that was pure heaven. Halfway down the mountain, I completely lost my will to continue. I felt that I simply couldn’t lift myself up again. But more than the pain in my bum and my head, I felt I couldn’t take the heat and dehydration anymore and simply forced myself down the rest of the way, half boarding, half sliding and half falling. Phew… just recapping that all has made me slightly exhausted. Also the story is rather long for me to finish now… so, *to be continued*.

Oh, and if anyone wondered about the title of the post, that line from Brothers in Arms kept playing in my head over and over again as I struggled to snowboard. My fellow beginners were my brothers in arms, that long, tiring and yet extremely fulfilling day…

Through these fields of destruction
Baptisms of fire
I’ve witnessed your suffering
As the battles raged higher
And though they did hurt me so bad
In the fear and alarm
You did not desert me
My brothers in arms