Dedicated to every single one of you that I hung out with in the last three weeks

So here we are again... this time its goodbye for real even though its over the phone... How do I tell you all the things that I need to say... Can I make you understand how exactly you make me feel? Do you know that thinking of you always brings a smile to my face... Sometimes I remember some of the things we said and did and want to laugh so much because it was just the most fun ever... You need to know that when I am down and out, I will think of you and this short time that we had together... But even when I am happy and high on life (or more likely, alcohol) I will remember you and I know that I will want to call you straight away... Before I never could because I was a kid... But now that I've met you again I know that my phone bills are going to get astronomically high because I don't want to lose touch with you ever again... And have I told you lately that I love you... Thank you for the best three weeks of my life...

And so it ends...

I often wonder why we do this to ourselves... Are we so unhappy in our place of birth that people have to get up and leave in search of greener pastures all the time? I don't have the answers but I do know the pain of having to say goodbye as once more I leave behind the people I love... There is so much that I want to tell you before I go... I'd like you to know that I think you did a wonderful job of bringing me up even though I didn't always know it and didn't always show it...

I often wonder what my life would have been like if I had come here instead of Australia... Maybe Christmas would've meant something instead of being an excuse to get drunk, maybe the cure for Madras-sickness would've been just a short flight away, maybe the earth-shattering grief I felt at the death of my beloved H would've been eased by more than one person... Lots of maybes... There are probably many negative maybes too... So again, I don't have the answers...

What I do know is this... you mean the world to me and always have... When we are all together I feel that nothing can ever go wrong for me... I hate that I have to go back to Australia even though S is like my family there and you will continue to have me in your thoughts and prayers... It isn't enough for me... It never has been... I feel your absence there more strongly than I ever imagined I would...

So what am I left with... two absolutely wonderful weeks that ended in the blink of an eye... I know that time flies when you're having fun... I wish it wouldn't... It should fly when you are lonely and depressed... So when I am lonely and depressed I will remember this short time that we had together and even though it will make me sadder that it had to end I will be glad that I had the chance to experience it even...

The tears are rolling down my cheeks now as I realise that I will be saying goodbye to you in less than two hours... So goodbye dear family... My only hope is that it is not six years before we can all be together again...

Say hello to Rusty

Meet Rusty... the newest addition to F K... isn't he absolutely adorable... Obviously I'm crossing my fingers that I do get to meet him in December or whenever...




The other day I was looking at pictures of Rusty and C and my cousin M was like 'Hahaha... by the time you go home, they'll both be dead'... That was so mean but it could so easily happen with our great luck with dogs recently... Ah well, one can only hope!

Home again...

What a wonderful feeling it is to be welcomed home... even if the home is not necessarily the home you're used to, it is a home just the same because the people who live in it have been waiting for the day till they finally got to see you again and they welcome you with open arms and tears in their eyes... and they are tears of joy, not sadness... because something that none of you expected to happen, finally happened again through the grace of God... a family reunited again after so many years... well, still missing a couple of people, but it should be whole again soon enough...

And so there was garlanding and crowning as they welcomed the "Queen" and all you could do was laugh at their silliness but at the same time you were secretly so happy that you were getting all this attention!!

Since then, its been an absolute whirlwind of activity... catching up with Mom and Mama and R and A, fishing and playing pool and basketball with the boys, drinking margharitas and daquiris and eating fajitas and tortillas at Don Pablo's, four of us staying up late and really getting to know each other all over again... such a good feeling...

I really don't want it to end!

City of Angels

I wish I could say that my first glimpse of the city was the waves crashing down on the famous Los Angeles surfer beaches as the sun slowly set on the horizon... Sadly, I was wedged in between 4 people in the middle of the stupid plane and would have been lucky to even catch a glimpse of the sky... This was after being treated like a terrorist at Melbourne and Sydney airports and more than 13 hours of sitting in a cramped seat with a psycho child constantly kicking the back of my seat and the light from the projected television screen right in front of me constantly changing colours and not allowing me to sleep even with my eyes tightly shut... Ah well, I thought at least the worst must truly be over and it can only get better from here on in... Not quite... I had to endure an hour of waiting in an immigration line with a constant fear that the officer ("the face of our nation" as they call themselves) would deem me a threat or a possible immigrant and refuse me entry to see my family and friends after all this waiting... What a relief it was to finally get the Admitted stamp in my passport and to not endure any more screening of my baggage and finally get out of all the mess to see the familiar faces of R and R and the not-so-familiar face of baby A who is absolutely adorable by the way...

So then they spent the day showing me all the sights and sounds of Los Angeles... we drove down the Pacific highway and saw the beaches of Venice, Santa Monica, Palisades something (I can't remember) and Malibu... we stopped off at a fancy restaurant named Moonshadows (even though we were dressed like total bums and every car there was a Lexus, Jaguar, Porsche or Beamer) and sampled oysters and calamari whilst watching the waves hitting the rocks below us...

We drove through Bel Air and Beverly Hills and saw the houses (well, at least saw the walls surrounding the houses) that we will never be able to afford and the cars we will never drive and saw the shops we will never shop in down Rodeo Drive... you know what, I am being pessimistic... maybe one day these things will happen to us... There's no harm in dreaming!

Finally we went to the touristy star struck area of Hollywood and walked down the well-known star walk and caught a glimpse of the Hollywood sign sitting white and pretty on the hills...

That night we drove downtown and picked up J and R from their apartment in downtown LA... So we simply went down the road to Numero Uno Pizzeria and had an awesome time catching up... I cannot express how it felt to be with such familiar girls again... Girls must have their girlfriends or they can really pine away and I have been pining away in Melbourne for way too long... I was sad to say goodbye to them for the night but I am happy will get to see them again soon.

Back home we had a couple of drinks and spoke about what else but Madras and finally got some well-deserved sleep.

The next morning I left to Virginia but that's another story...

All in all it was a rather nice introduction to a city I've never been to and I found that I quite liked what I saw in the brief time that I was there... I can't wait to get back and really experience it...